Ups and Downs All The Time

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When I was on anti depressants I had up and down days.  Anti depressants helped a lot in the acute stage.  Mornings always bad.  But as the years went on the anti depressants did not always stop the "downs."  Sometimes I would feel well for days, and then down I would go again.

I came off anti depressants over a year ago (after 20 years).  I do everything I can to help myself, like taking supplements, walking, going out, etc. but oh get up and down days so much.  yesterday I felt OK, today I am low ago and feeling tearful.

I started a voluntary job with children in a school, and I was doing well.  I would not have taken it on if I did not think I could do it, I felt well then.  Now, after a blip at Christmas, I am worried I will not be able to cope with it, which saddens me.  I never want to go back onto anti depressants, and I know, from experience, they will not help with these constant ups and downs. 

I do so want to cope, but I am an old lady now, and after 20 years of fighting depression I am getting weary of the battle.  But I will soldier on, but it is getting very tiring.

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    what suppliements are you on Anne? Have you tried 5-htp. I did a lot of research on them earlier this year and they work very well for some people. Unfortunately, for me they caused very bad cystitis so I had to come off of them but I definitely noticed a difference in my mood.

    Don't foget also Anne, this time of year is terrible. THe weather is grim and dark.

    Have you got a light box?  I suffer from SAD and I have invested in one.  I must say, i've been a bit slack in using mine, only becuase if I use it before work, i'd need to wake up at 5.30am to get 30 minutes of light in before having to get out of bed!!!!


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    • Posted

      5HTP really makes me feel weird.  Tried it before, got it again recently, but I really don't like it.  St John's Wort made no difference either. 

      I take Omega3, VitaminB complex, VitaminD, Multi vitamins and minerals, magnesium, and cod liver oil for my arthritis.  I am not on any prescribed medication, so think I am doing well at my age.

      Yes don't like this time of year.  I don't know if you are in the UK, but at the moment really horrid weather. 

      No I don't have a light box.  My depressi9on is all round.  I don't have a car so walk a lot and get outdoors as much as I can. 

      I am lucky as retired now so not ruled by the clock.  i belong to a senior citizens group and do a lot of activities.

      I am just low at the moment.

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  • Posted

    hi anne nice to hear from you i dont.think i would be able to cope without my meds ! i applaud you for regards christmas you werent to know would happen stop being so hard on your self and your NOT a old woman your  a teenager in a young.body lol regards your meds would you consider a maintence dose to help ! take care  david x
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    • Posted

      Yup I am young at heart.  I do a lot of things to help myself.  I am out a lot.  Walk a lot.  Have great family.

      Just a bit blue at the moment.  After over 20 years on anti depressants I am glad not to be taking them. 

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  • Posted

    you are still doing medicine is wonderful.i think we all try to pay alot of attention to ourselves when we feel bad.its only natural.thats all i did do.your doing really good not to be taking medicine.i think anyway.we all have our bad days.i been on depression med.17 years.i just had to have something to get me through the withdrawls
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  • Posted

    Hey Anne.....I am so happy for you....stay strong....the victory is always yours at the end.....age does not act as a huge factor....but your will is strong.....Don let anything bring you down....God Is always With you....stay strong!!....Jesus loves you!!!
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  • Posted

    Its ok to feel the way you do Anne,

    I have played the game of emotional snakes and ladders since my early teens.

    Up the ladder of positive thinking and down the snakes tail into depression.

    But mostly just plodding on day after day.

    I used to think I was the only one to feel like this but it seems not.

    We are all just doing our best day in day out. I just Seem to have more than those around  me.

    But I am starting to accept that this is the way I am.

    I can imagine  your a wonderful asset to the school.


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    • Posted

      Hey Jo, thank you for your really nice message.  Yes plodding on.  I am getting out, and just low hopefully will feel better when spring arrives.  Hate this time of year. 

      You are right, we are doing our best to live with depression.  It is just I seem to have had it for so long. 

      Thank you for being so kind

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