Vague memory problems and multi system troubles/premature ageing 18 years old
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Hi, I am harry 18,
Over the last two years I have been suffering from memory problems (Mild at times, severe at times) these have not improved and linearly increase, my neurologist has brushed it off, labeling them attention problems because of my age.
It's not just recent memories it's everything, I feel like my life is disappearing between my fingers, childhood memories are disappearing en masse.
There is a list of symptoms I cannot ascribe a time period to partly due to my memory. problems and partly because I haven't kept track, so some of these I have had for 10 years others months.
-Ageing skin (Spots of hyper pigmentation and 0 pigmentationwidespread cherry anginomas, wrinkles, abnormal fat distribution, hardening. General aged and unhealthy appearance relative to family)
-Extremely rapidly thinning hair on scalp
-Steep decrease in pubic hair density, widespread greying, as in every single hair is grey and thin at 18
-Overall neurological decline (Includes: memory problems, reasoning capacity, tingling sensations, trouble finding words, hearing loss (Higher frequencies) )
-Loss of emotion/complete numbness
-Abnormal bone structure, thin bones relative to family
-Small circumference
I was diagnosed autistic at age 6
This is not a result of bad genetics in the non disease sense, my dad, mum and brother have none of these problems, my brother is younger than me yet taller, has about 2x the bone thickness, and none of the above mentioned problems.
I don't have a B12 deficiency, because I take a b12 supplement every day
I have been to my doctor so many times, it is no use. I am suffering from suicidal thoughts because of these things and have attempted to end my life once.
I don't know what is wrong with me, I have been to an electronics club (exposed to lead)
opened watches and clocks as a kid (radium exposure) and have been exposed to dioxins by roughly the same pathways.
I am depressed desperate and angry and jealous at my brother
I would appreciate any suggestion immensely thank you so much
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Patient harry89618
Posted
Hi harry89618
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.
Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.
If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
Kindest regards
Patient