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Very teary today, little things getting to me ..is this normal?

Posted , 9 users are following.

tilley49386
tilley49386

Hi fellow forum users, I am having a real downer of a day. Up until today my pain and discomfort has been manageable but today the area is really uncomfortable and throbbing. Ice packs help and of course I am resting but I wonder if other ladies have days like these.

I am feeling very foolish today. Very uncomfortable down there and very teary, my plumber couldn't come to fix my blocked tiolet for few days and I burst into tears. Is this normal or am I getting depressed? trying to stay positive but it iis so hard to just keep resting and 8 weeks seems so far away. Stiches starting to tighten and I fel heavy down there , more than bit anxious that everything is falling back out again.. of course I know it isn't ..but have cried most of day. Think lack of hormone cream may be giving me menopause symptoms too. Never mind tomorrow is one day closer to recovery and I must stay positive. Good friend cannot understand why I need to rest so much and why I cant just get back to my everyday activities, their lack of understanding has not helped. Mind you they are a mere male and guess they wouldn't understand. Hope other ladies are coping better.

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15 Replies

  • barbara_92
    barbara_92 tilley49386

    Posted

    Oh bless you. It will get better. We all go through this feeling, well most of us. I have been lucky that I have had the support of friends and family. I am going back to work today after 13 weeks off of work. It is 6am I am trying to waken up.

    Around six weeks what you are feeling hit me. Give it time it will get better.

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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 barbara_92

      Posted

      Yes I sure it will can't get any worst can it? LOL. Sure hope not .

      Thanks for the support , good luck for today and make sure you take it easy. If I had 13 weeks off I don't think I would have a job to go back to. You must work for a good company.  

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  • diann34970
    diann34970 tilley49386

    Posted

    You had major surgery and it is very important that you take it easy and rest. There will be days like you are feeling, and that's normal because we have been used to being superwoman and now we can't do the things we used to right now. Get some days, weeks in between you and the surgery and soon enough you wil be up and moving around, and things will be back normal again. I'm 17 weeks and I am still guarding my recovery and taking time out to rest and not overdo it. Sorry that some people don't understand or empathize with what you have and are going through. Remember it's your body and your recovery, and hopefully you get the support and help you need during this time of recovery. We are here for you, and care , most of all we have been there. Thanks for mentioning the hormone cream , I seem to forget I'm supposed to use twice a week , even though I got bad cramps immediately after I applied last week, don't know what that was all about. Take care!!
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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 diann34970

      Posted

      You are absolutely right about the super women thing, think that is one of reasons feeling depressed , so used to be busy and getting stuff done. It's actually really draining doing nothing! LOL. Thanks for support. I take a magnesium tablet for the cramps really helps.This site is a heaven send after lack of freidns support. Hubby is great but again doesn't see it and still asks me to do stuff. I must just be stronger. Will take care , you too and thanks for replying. Feeling supported and luved 
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  • sueStace
    sueStace tilley49386

    Posted

    Bless, I was teary 2 weeks in, felt so useless, hubby doing everything! You go from being so active to nothing!

    Stay positive, you'll get there hun! I'm 4 months post op and it's a distant memory now! Xx

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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 sueStace

      Posted

      Thanks for replying so soon and for your support and kind words.Yep useless and not in control was just how I felt today.I am that kind of person hate relaying on others and bit of a my way or highway kind of girl so I have to really bite my tongue when hubby does do work ebevn though I really want to get up and go do it myself. I will try & follow your advice and stay positive and not be such brave, took myself of daytime pain killers as was coping. Roll on 4 months and again good to know it is usual to feel this down really helps. lol
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  • bresychen
    bresychen tilley49386

    Posted

    You poor lovely. As the others have said, it will pass. I can't believe how much the op messes with your head. I take low dose mess for anxiety (which becomes depression if I don't manage it properly) and I seriously contemplated increAsing the dose. My low point was a day when hubby took the kids out and I wailed - yep, physically howled at the moon. Terribly humiliating but I felt better afterwards! Can't even remember what triggered, something insignificant I expect, certainly not as important as a blocked toilet - that would have required two days of crying! I hope you feel better soon. I found a book of short stories helped me escape - couldn't concentrate enough for a novel. It was Sherlock Holmes so totally unemotional and just right. 
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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 bresychen

      Posted

      Thanks bresychen, your post made me smile and gave me back my sense of humour. Great idea re short stories because I find I can't concentrate for a long time either. Thanks for sharing your experience makes me realise I am not only one.I will keep smiling and trying to stay positive and will be so much easier with the support and help of all you lovely ladies who keep posting on this forum 
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  • KJ1234
    KJ1234 tilley49386

    Posted

    I'm teary too today. 2 weeks post op - home alone all day every day. Its hard.  I'm a divorced mum of 2 and its times like this I wish I wasnt single and that I had someone who could help me. I know this is a down phase and will probably feel different tomorrow
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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 KJ1234

      Posted

      Hi KJ, thanks for sharing. Realise now this is normal as I have had so many replies telling me they feel the same. So makes me feel normal and will expect more and just except them as to be expected and that tomorrow I will feel better and in 6 months it will all be a distant memory and all will be great. Sorry to hear you have no one to help you. At least I have my hubby at night. Keep smiling 
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  • Bunky
    Bunky tilley49386

    Posted

    Oh I remember the week I just cried over everything including at my poor hubby for not having put the lead away after coming back in with the dog - it was like have baby blues all over again !!! It really does mess with your head but the good news it passes just hang in there and try not to judge yourself on how you should or shouldn't be feeling ! You have had major surgery and it is completely normal that you have teary days, grumpy days, tired days - don't let anybody including yourself make you feel like you should be doing anything more than you are !

    Hope you have felt better as the days gone on xx

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    • tilley49386
      tilley49386 Bunky

      Posted

      Thanks for the story and support. You are right about judging yourself and I don't mean against fellow forum patients but more to do with how others think you should be coping better. No visible wounds and a taboo subject - not exactly diner conversation make it impossible for others to relate and empathise. Instead I get surely you must be feeling better now. You look so well when can you start babysitting again etc. Work wise they cannot understand if I can sit - why cant I sit at work? ARGHH, just explained so sore and get tired and they arn't happy but like a fellow forum lady put it just for a change we need to put ourselves first. Keep smiling. 
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