Veterans With PTSD and The Effect On Relationships

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This has been a long year. One of much heart ache and education. I dated my Air Force Combat Vet ex boyfriend for an amazing year. Truly amazing in so many ways. Last Aug when we pulled out of Afghan he had a very bad PTSD break. He received a lot of treatment but nothing worked and he refused medication after the first go around with it. He continued to do things to push me away although he will strongly disagree that he was trying to push me away. Regardless, because I understood the ugly of this trauma his behavior was met with understanding and compassion. I went through the roller coaster of "I cannot say I love you" out of the blue- that lasted a month. Then it was "I love you and need you to get through this" and then same pushing behavior until he finally ended our relationship in a text. He told me he could not give me what I needed and that he was broken. I believe that in his mind he was trying to spare me heartache but he actually broke my heart. It has been 6 weeks and I have not responded- I have no idea what to say as that was an awful thing to do to someone who loves and supports you through the ugly. I have read so many stories in the past year of the same exact behavior except most women are met with verbal and or physical abuse. I was not but the pain is as if I had. This has been an absolutely awful experience.

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    hi melissa, i can't imagine what combat, armed fighting, defending countries or supporting people with ptsd feels like at all BUT my background is suffering ptsd through multiple assault. i still sometimes experience nightmares, flashbacks, shaking, sickness, fear, heart-racing, i hated men, i wouldn't go near, i would shake, throw up, sob, get angry, self-harm and sank in to depths of such deep depression. ptsd is the most misunderstood condition until you've experienced it! both you and your partner who you supported experienced ptsd. it doesn't affect 1 person in a partnership, it's both. you may need to pull away from him for a bit/long time who knows but you? well done for trying to support him though, i am definite it was tough. he may need some professional support, trying to convince hi.n is a tough thing. concentrate on you. try take a break for you, i lost our chance at ivf through having untreated ptsd, it's something i'll never forget - ever. i hope your partner is ok? you spoke on here, he didn"t! you did the hardest thing....

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