What are the odds I gave my bf herpes? (help)
Posted , 7 users are following.
I NEED HELP!!! Just for some context, I used to get cold sores as a kid but i have not gotten one in years. Okay, so earlier this morning while i was driving to his house i felt a tingling sensation on my lower lip (i brushed it off, as i have sensitive skin so it happens sometimes). I met up with my boyfriend and spent the day with him, and we later made out and i performed oral sex on him. Later that day around 9 at night, i notice two small bumps on the very bottom of my lower lip. i dont immediately assume its herpes, since i had not gotten one on my lip in YEARS and there are other rational explanations. However, i know tingling is a symptom of a cold sore. Even though i did not have visible bumps on my lips (that were not opened nor oozing with anything) at the time when i kissed him and went down on him, I am still freaking out because im worried i gave my boyfriend herpes, either in his mouth or on his genitals. Keep in mind he has never had a cold sore in his life, so he did not give this to me in the first place. Someone please reassure me that I did not just ruin his life. Or someone tell me the possibility of me giving him my herpes. I would never be able to forgive myself if i did. 😦
0 likes, 18 replies
joseph666 pagirl01
Posted
i dont think you infected your partner,but did you disclose herpes to him?
pagirl01 joseph666
Posted
Yes, I explained to him the situation last night. He was not mad since he knew it wasn't either of our faults, although obviously he is a bit worried. I am way more worried than he is actually, I would feel like s**t if I found out I gave him either oral or genital herpes and idk what do do ah
carley11433 pagirl01
Posted
1000000000% U GAVE IT TOO HIM . EDUCATE YOURSELF !
pagirl01 carley11433
Posted
To* maybe you should educate yourself as well and calm down.
xDx91xPi pagirl01
Posted
its possible you did pass it on to him.
if its going to flare up it usually happens 2-21 days after. you dont have to have an outbreak to pass it, the virus sheds and can be passed that way.
i think you should tell him you have herpes orally and let him decide if he is happy or not to use protection orally 😃
pagirl01 xDx91xPi
Posted
I understand if I passed it on to him orally, but I don't even think the area of my lip made contact with his penis since the tingling sensation was on the very very bottom of my lower lip (like where my lip starts to meet my upper chin), so is he safe from genital herpes? And yes, I told him last night and he wasn't mad or anything. He was glad I told him but I was up all night worrying that I may have given him this.
xDx91xPi pagirl01
Posted
No he's not fully safe from it. Even if you don't have a cold sore for the rest of your life it still stays in your body! The virus is most likely to spread during a active outbreak (cold sore).
He could have it now and never have symptoms ever. Only way you'll know is if he has a outbreak and gets swabbed or if he gets his bloods checked!
If he himself has cold sores before then i wouldnt be too concerned.
carley11433 pagirl01
Posted
its0 your bodily fluids that transmit it not the bumps chic. you should b practicing safe sex period . its so irresponsible of you . does he even know you have herpes simplex 1? crazy
xDx91xPi carley11433
Posted
herpes is not transmitted via fluids its skin to skin contact or contact with the fluid within the blister if thats what you mean.
the virus is not always active.
so many people in this world have herpes and dont know it. alot of people are not educated about it or transmisson so are unaware that it can be spread orally to genitally.
its very clear is worried that he might get it, but if you read above she has told him and he is okay with it ( you'd be surprised how many people are). Herpes is not a death or life sentence and shouldnt control how you life or your happiness!
pagirl01 xDx91xPi
Posted
thank you! 😃
xDx91xPi pagirl01
Posted
no problem!
life is short, we shouldn't spend it over worrying and resenting people! yes herpes is for life, but its not a life sentence! it took me a while to learn this but honestly does deserve the stress it causes! if anything its made me look after myself more 😃
i got hsv2 from an ex that was cheating, he himself didnt have symptoms till long after. im not from america and they wont test for herpes unless there is a lesion! of course i was angry but i dont think the amount of people who go around sleeping with people to intentionally spread something is very small.
try not to worry!
Noname01 carley11433
Posted
Oh man, herpes is transmitted from skin to skin contact, not fluids.
you can practice safe sex and still get it because condoms would literally have to be used 24/7.
Get over yourself.
Noname01 pagirl01
Posted
Its possible you did. you dont even need an active outbreak in order to transmit.
even if you did though, i promise you didnt ruin his life lol
Genital herpes is no different than your cold sores. its the same thing just a different location.
its kind of mind blowing that you dont have to disclose oral herpes (cold sores) but have to when its genital, even though they both transmit the exact same way.
carley11433 pagirl01
Posted
you do not need to have an outbreak to infect him period ! i got herpes from my ex would get cold sores . im DEVASTATED i feel like im nev er gonna b happy n in love again ever bc i refuse too give someone herpes
Ahhh123 pagirl01
Posted
did you ever find out if he got it ?
pagirl01 Ahhh123
Posted
no he never got it! thank god