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It turns out the lump near my anus turned out to be a perennial abscess. I'm really bummed out and feel ashamed. I'm a clean person and this was really unexpected. From all the horror stories I've read, it seems like this is a lifelong condition and that really makes me sad. I went to the ER and the doctor was able to drain the abscess, but it seems like it's popped up again (fistula), I think. I'm going to book an appointment tomorrow asap! However, that does not bring me closure as it seems like this will reoccur every so often. My question is, how do I deal with this? How do I live a normal life? How do I gain any motivation daily? It's so hard just to push forward, I know I don't have cancer but it still feels like the end. I really need someone to talk to who has experienced this issue and can provide some insight. I've been eating nothing but fast food for the past two years, I smoked weed on a daily basis and I only sleep about 5-6 hours a day. I've started to change these habits but I feel no relief. If I'm going to get this all of the time, how do I live a productive life?
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