What's the point?

Posted , 4 users are following.

Hey Guys,

It turns out the lump near my anus turned out to be a perennial abscess. I'm really bummed out and feel ashamed. I'm a clean person and this was really unexpected. From all the horror stories I've read, it seems like this is a lifelong condition and that really makes me sad. I went to the ER and the doctor was able to drain the abscess, but it seems like it's popped up again (fistula), I think. I'm going to book an appointment tomorrow asap! However, that does not bring me closure as it seems like this will reoccur every so often. My question is, how do I deal with this? How do I live a normal life? How do I gain any motivation daily? It's so hard just to push forward, I know I don't have cancer but it still feels like the end. I really need someone to talk to who has experienced this issue and can provide some insight. I've been eating nothing but fast food for the past two years, I smoked weed on a daily basis and I only sleep about 5-6 hours a day. I've started to change these habits but I feel no relief. If I'm going to get this all of the time, how do I live a productive life? 

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  • Posted

    I’m going to try and answer your questions in order firstly, your perianal abscess honestly has nothing to do with cleanliness, I honestly am the queen of clean unfortunately they just happen. It’s also not always a life long condition, but you do need to make an appointment to see your colorectal consultant asap, it’s not necessarily a fistula, it’s not uncommon for abscesses to come back again . If it is a fistula then believe me you will learn to cope with it. It’s interesting that you have said “ I know it’s not cancer “ my colorectal surgeon said to me a couple of years ago, in a way it’s a lot easier to treat cancer than this. You do need to eat better definitely, fast food doesn’t give you all the nutrients you need (I’m not lecturing you on anything here, I’m certainly not a skinny healthy person).  About the weed I don’t know if that will affect it all I do know for a fact is that regardless of what anyone says it does cause serious mental health problems later in life but that’s completely your choice, smoking does slow down the healing process, having said that I gave up but it didn’t help !.

    i think at the moment the best thing is to see your doctor and find out if it’s a fistula. Now a bit about my problem, I don’t actually have a fistula, I had a perianal abscess nearly 5 years ago I was very very ill with sepsis and was close to dying by the time I got to A&E. I was operated on and had it packed every day, however the open wound just won’t heal. I’ve had several surgeries to try and rectify it but I am still left with a 12cm deep 4cm wide open wound that drains pus continuously. It’s horrible and I hate it, but eventually you do learn to live with it. Just remember that mine is a very rare problem. Also remember that on here you will only hear people’s horror stories and not success stories and there are success stories I promise you. 

    Try and keep smiling and let me know how it goes 

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  • Posted

    Hi Sad, 

    Sorry to hear about your troubles. Don't worry about your diet, it does not affect your fistula.

    I have a fistula and fighting it. I have'had one seton placement and one additional surgery and it is already better.You can read my story in others posts.

    Not true that it is a lifelong issue (even if it is indeed a fistula).

    The overwhelming majority of the people that get fistulas fix it, and some recurrences can also be fixed as well! Especially if its simple, it's only one surgery.

    My advice: Get a good CRS quickly (the diet staff simply does not work in my view) and keep your spirits up! It's 100% curable, not cancer, nor terminal!.


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  • Posted

    Hey Sad,

    It looks like you have already gotten some good advice but I wanted to say there is no reason to feel ashamed. There is basically nothing you could have done to prevent it.  These things just happen.  You must "move forward" and not look back.

    Keep in mind the abscess didn't necessarily come back - but rather a fistula formed. This happens up to 50% of the time when a peri-anal abscess is drained - and happened to me too. Like you, I too was freaking out.. 

    I had a fistulatomy about two weeks ago and happy to report that it seems to have been a successful surgery.   My symptoms are almost all gone minus minor discharge (only a few drops here and there) but expect it to stop knowing it can take 4- 6 weeks to fully heal.

    All I can say is go to a well respected colo-rectal surgon ASAP.  You and your doctor can then come up with a treatment plan based on your situation.  If surgery is part of that plan, don't worry it's really not that bad.  I really was never in any serious pain.  You just need to follow the post surgery instructions and you will be fine! 

    Good Luck


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  • Posted

    Hi Sad. Nothing to feel ashamed about .It is an abscess and abscess can form anywhere. Only problem with perineal abscess is its location and due to which it is little difficult to heal.

    I am having same issue since Nov. Keep faith and educate yourself by reading online .

    Mine started with excruciating pain and hard lump few days after bowel movement. I felt tear inside . It has been 4 months but finally i feel better.

    I made couple of changes in my diet and lifestyle.

    Drink juice (homemade) with kale, mixed greens, carrot, raddish tumeric, blackpepper, orange. Don't add any sugar.

    Drink lot of water .

    Use stool softners

    Sitz bath with plain epsom salt as many times as possible.

    Most importantly, research and fins a good colorectal surgeon. Good one is important as their procedures are less invasive and precise.

    I also made homemade suppositories with tumeric and coconut oil.

    Besides this i used Arnica 30X, Silicae , Tumeric caps with curcumin.

    I know one feels so sad and believe me these 4 months were terrible but i feel so much better now.

    Avoid sugar in any form.

    Keep area clean. Buy witch hazel and wet wipes .

    Take care


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  • Posted

    Hey guys!

    I appreciate everyone taking the time to leave their comments. It helps more than you can imagine.

    I’ve had about 3 abscess’ now and I have a feeling it’s a fistula. I have an appointment scheduled with a specialist but this keeps coming back while i’m waiting.

    Life sucks...

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