where am i

Life is like a rollwin coster, you have the hight and the lowland the length in each part depends on many actions. To ensure you reach the top, you first need to conquer the low part of the ride. In total, life is beautif and interesting. We just need to learn to take what is ours. Do what makes you happy, help others (very helpfull), and just enjoy the little things in life.

Life is amazing, we need to learn and open our eyes. My kids and my dogs are.my goal... find yours.

Find something harmless you do. Even if it's just once. Hope everything works for you.

How long have you been taking the med? Sounds like it is not working for you at all. I found this on it. You should contact your doctor asap. It sounds like you are sinking further into your depression. I've never taken it personally, but I've tried a good variety of different antidepressants. You are not alone in this struggle. I've been there, I know. Please read this and see your doctor. There is hope for all of us. I agree completely with 2taina75! Life is beautiful and there are so many ups and downs. I've just come out of a 6 year low!!

http://www.drugs.com/mirtazapine.html

it's true reading through this thread and responses, yes, life can be amazing and great. But i also appreciate and recognise for you at the present, feels meaningless and unattainable, due to feeling so unwell. In addition you have experienced an excessive amount of loses. This illness is destructive and a robber of everything that once was eg job, home, family etc. I have been on Mirtazipine for just over 5 weeks. It was great for me for the first two weeks, lifted my depression and returned my joy. The last couple of weeks i have been rather down and experiencing uncontrollable sobbing and extreme rages! My gp has now asked me to quit meds for two weeks. After this he will reassess and provide me with a new plan of action in achieving a positive outcome for my depression. General concensus is; 'finding the right antidepressant is like finding a needle in a haystack!' People consider themselves lucky if their first or second one works for them. It's worth getting a meds review from your doctor to ascertain if he/she thinks any slight alterations to your doseage or antidepressant may help you. Only when you start feeling a little better, will you start to see a light at the end of the tunnel emerging.

You mentioned you lost your house and this must of caused you great stress (both personal and monetary) and a geat deal of pain. But try as hard as it is, to let that go eg. 'that was then'. and to focus on the 'now' which is getting well. On achieving a lift in your depression, you can then look forward to 'what will be') on reading through your post, i know only to well the pain and scepticism of regaining your life back. Many of us here have travelled or are travelling the road you are now on. Some of us (very few) travel at steady 50 mph with no road blocks/obstructions and get to their destination reaching reasonable health in record time. Most of us have trouble starting up our engines and even when we do, we only can only manage 0 -10mph and are plagued by potholes, road blocks and to compound matters we are constantly travelling with a severe weather warning ... heavy fog!

Not a bad analogy from a non driver lol!

Murray you will get your health back, don't let any side effects of meds or deepening of depression slide too long before seeing your doc, keep pestering if you are feeling unmanageable symptoms. I am sure when you are feeling better, you can mend any broken relationships with your family.

now....off to the doctor pronto! Lol.

god bless and please keep us updated ♥♥