Where do I start?

Posted , 4 users are following.

Long story short, I am 42 but in 2012 had major back surgery. Now in 2018 I still suffer and I am on lots of meds and have no one to talk to about it. No one I understands and I feel so lonely.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    HI Scott

    I’m in a similar position to you, I have had 4 ops since 2012 and I still suffer daily on a regular basis. If you’re like me and have been “lost in the system” my advice would be 

    1. Have regular appointments with your GP. It doesn’t matter if it’s 2 or 3 times a week, you need to keep on top of your mental health, it’s so important.

    2. Try and get an appointment with your local pain clinic at the hospital. I was in such a bad way before seeing them and although I’m nowhere near any type of normality I’ve found the pain clinic to be the best help yet.

    3. Keep talking to friends and family and if you have to, then badger them for support. It’s frustrsating having no one that knows what you’re going through but persevere.

    Good luck and keep posting on here for support.


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  • Posted

    Thank you for your replies. I just feel in constant pain and also have moments of extreme pain. On oxycodone liquid and  longtec tablets as well as some nerve tablets. Just feel down a lot and feel like I have lost the zip in life I used to have. My posture is terrible and can no longer stand straight like I used to. Hate seeing my scar in the mirror as well. 
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    • Posted

      Scott there are lots of different medications available that combine pain killing, depression and nerve upset,  I’m currently on Duloxetine and find that helps for all 3. You sound fed up and I can sympathise why. Things will get better I can assure you.

      N - no

      H - hurry

      S - service

      Sad but true, there is not going to be a quick fix. Try and stay hopeful! I still suffer from terrible anxiety and get many episodes where I fear that I will be in this pain for the rest of my life. I’ve tried everything to combat these but they still come regularly. 

      One day you will start to see an improvement. I go to a help group of people with similar chronic conditions and there are people there who were in similar situations to you that now have a good quality of life. 

      You will get better!

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  • Posted

    Dear Scott,

    My heart goes out to you as your story is similar to mine...... I am now 60 and had fusion on L5 / S1 in 2000.  No one ever told me until afterwards that back surgery can have a "Domino" affect on a back that has many issues....... like mine...... they fixed one level only...... later they told me that they start with one as it could be the cure!! liars....... I also had a partially severed Sciatic Nerve and S1 Root Nerve..... they didn't fix that....... had herniations and bulges and leaky discs all the way up my spine..... and tumors........ and they told me that I would need more surgery!!!  F**** that!!  these doctors know nothing of the PAIN...... and they do not understand what it is like..... but your fellow "Pain Pals" here will....... you will find a lot of support here from people with great advise to share....... What good things do you do for yourself and your back now??....... do you go to a warm pool where you would be weightless and able to stretch and walk with minimal to no difficulty and pain??........ Have you tried Acupuncture....... Massage........ watching funny TV shows and Movies as laughter seriously helps when our tolerance to constant pain wears out....... Music Helps....Aroma Therapy...... Hot Soaks with Aroma Therapy......Hot Tub...... do you have a dog or cat??...... have you ever thought about getting a therapy dog?..... I have one....... I am allergic to Cats so I can't give you an opinion on them....... but a therapy dog would be amazing for you....... they love us and they understand what we are going through..... they lick us and cuddle us...... no way you can be lonely...... and then you would go to the dog park........ If you are single their are many single people that go to the dog park....... Most dog owners are good people........ do not allow yourself to be lonely...... do you not have family??...... if not I am so sorry...... but you can find friends and support as long as you do not allow this situation to turn you into a "shut in"........ Join an art class....... or a music class...... Hydro therapy....... you will find that there are many people at these events who are in similar situations....... send me a message if you ever want to chat...... take care...... I hope to hear a good update soon!

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  • Posted

    Hi Paul/Erela. Thank you for the support and info. I find that a lot of the time it's the lack of understanding what people like us are going through: I feel like a freak, scared to say to the wife my back is sore, she mocks me a lot even tho she knows I had a 10 hour op and still have regular check ups. Sorry to keep going on. 

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