Why am I getting these thoughts?!!!!
Posted , 7 users are following.
Hi I am new to this,
I am a 17 year old girl. Recently I have been getting these weird and very disturbing thoughts. It is very embarrassing to talk about and I feel disgusting as a person.
I keep getting thoughts about sexually abusing little children, I would never ever do that! I am not that type of person no way! I have little brothers who are 4 and 5 and sometimes i get these thoughts about sexually abusing them! This is a really big struggle for me and I don’t want to be judged because I don’t want these thoughts, I would never do that to my brothers or any child!
But then I think to myself if I’m having these thoughts then I must be a pedophile because only pedophiles get these thoughts. But I don’t want these thoughts and I don’t want to do these things!! I feel sick when I think about this and I’m really struggling to make them go away.
Not only do I have thoughts about that, I also have thoughts thinking that someone is going to come in my house and kill me and all my family! It is horrible.
I keep getting different thoughts though, some will come and go but the pedophile one is the worst that will not go away.
I also keep thinking that I’m schizophrenic or something, I will hear something and then convince myself that I am hearing things and other thoughts that I am thinking are ‘you have to stab your boyfriend or your mum will die’ obviously I would never do that to my boyfriend, but it’s really getting to me and these thoughts are constantly in my head and I’m struggling and I can’t cope with getting through the days.
I honestly feel like I am going mad! I just need to know if anyone is experiencing the same things I am and will I get better? Am I a pedophile? Could I kill my boyfriend? But I don’t want to do any of these things and it’s literally ripping me apart as a person that I’m thinking about these things, I feel like I’m disgusting and need to die!
Please can someone help me and answer me! Are there ways to get through this!
0 likes, 10 replies
Guest Kate37890
Posted
It's anxiety caused by intrusive thoughts and/or vice versa. Are you on any drugs or medication?
Kate37890 Guest
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Guest Kate37890
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girl02520 Kate37890
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These are classic symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (a type of anxiety disorder). I am diagnosed with this disorder and experienced symptoms like this growing up, these are intrusive thoughts - it does not mean you are going mad or really feel or want to do these things so please try not to feel ashamed or guilty or scared about them. Obviously I am not a health professional so I would advice bringing this up to a doctor or mental health professional of some sort, or to a family member if you trust them. Don't be afraid to tell them exactly what you are experiencing, even if you feel embarrassed or ashamed as these are CLASSIC symptoms that medically trained professionals will understand and know you mean no harm to anyone. You can get more info on OCD here https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/obsessive-compulsive-disorder-ocd/symptoms-of-ocd/#.WpCYVUx2uYM and if you want to drop me a private message at all or need to talk, feel free x
Kate37890 girl02520
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Kate37890 girl02520
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MF6699 Kate37890
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First of all, there is no way that people on this discussion forum can determine if you are schizophrenic or not..only doctors can determine this as it is a genetic disease and they can detect it from a specific line of mental and physical health tests. Secondly, I suffer from OCD and used to (in my early teens alike yourself) used to think about the worst possible things that could happen to me. I would have visual flashes of falling down flights of stairs in school, I would think about hurting my mother or my father. I would have to walk up to the top of a building on some absurd street in the downtown of my city just to look at everything in the corridor or on the roof. It was completely irrational and I still can't explain it, but it was painful and I still deal with these absurd thoughts to this day (I am now a 28 year old female.) I can assure you you aren't alone and you might feel like you're going mad but you aren't....but I would strongly advise you get to a medical practitioner and a therapist (not a psychiatrist) first.
Kate37890 MF6699
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brooke69679 Kate37890
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rieez brooke69679
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You should talk to someone about it. Mental health is very important. If you can't talk to your love one, maybe call some therapies. Sometimes it's really hard to talk about something that bothers us mentally cz not everyone will understand. Don't let these thoughts fill your life. I encourage you to talk to someone about it.