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Why won't this just go away?

Posted , 5 users are following.

ronnie27968
ronnie27968

Hi everyone,

Since January, I've started doing things that scare me, things I used to like doing but now, due to my anxiety, can't handle.

I went on a class trip for a week, far from home and everything I know.

I went skiing with my family, in a different country, which really freaked me out.

I performed in a class play (I thought I would have to drop out, my symptoms were making me feel like I was dying).

I survived all those things, even though I thought I wouldn't.

Before I actually did those things, I thought that if I overcame it and survived it without fainting (my worst fear right now), then the anxiety would just leave me alone.

But I did all those things and the anxiety is still very much here.

I am trying to keep myself busy, so I went to a job interview and got accepted, I start work first thing next week. And I am freaking out.

I'm just SO tired of this routine, freaking out, feeling like sh*t, and then overcoming. But I'm just so tired of the before part.

How long is this gonna stay?? It's been seven months since it all started. 

I am 17 years old. I got my blood checked in October and everything came back fine. I wanna get it checked again but my therapist told me not to because it's just gonna become and obsession, I think she's right...

When will this just go away? I am seriously losing hope, what if I have to live like this forever? It sure looks like it right now...

I am not going anywhere and this whole year has been a waste, all I did was worry and feel physically awful.

I just want this to go away.

Thank you for reading this, is anyone else feeling like this?

xoxo

2 likes, 13 replies

13 Replies

  • Mindy27
    Mindy27 ronnie27968

    Posted

    I feel the same way I go to school and that's about it. Going to the grocery store is a big tasks for me at times. So you should be very proud of the things you have accomplished that's a huge step.
    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 Mindy27

      Posted

      I was also like that for four months... I actually barely even went to school.

      But then one day I was so p*ssed that anxiety is controlling my life and it's so unfair that there are people who have to go through this and people who don't, I said I wouldn't let me be different.

      But anxiety does still catch hold of me at times and I'm sure you're gonna get better.

      You just have to really hit that rock bottom where you just say, I can't do this anymore, and you start fighting.

  • elaine75237
    elaine75237 ronnie27968

    Posted

    Hi there Ronnie first of all anxiety sucks doesn't it. I'm sorry there is no magic cure but sounds like you were doing everything the right way. You went on holiday were in a play and you have been for an interview and have a new job. Wow, that's great. You also have a therapist and are talking about how you feel which I find helpful. You just have to keep going, I also think why is it so hard but in the long run we will come out the other side better people, I really believe that. Have you tried different breathing techniques to help you relax ? I also worry like crazy, but why ?all the worrying in the world never helped anyone. Best of luck with everything and keep moving forward. It might not seem like it but you are going in the right directipon. Be good to yourself and keep saying how well you are doing.cheesygrin
    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 elaine75237

      Posted

      Thank you so much!

      I know... It's so much easier asking yourself, why am I worrying, there is nothing to worry about, but the minute your heart starts beating fast, or you get dizzy, this is it, you're dying.

      It's just that routine that bothers me.

      The routine where I know nothing will happen, I will overcome, but I still feel different and not at all healthy...

      And also, people say that the things that happen to us are the most unexpected things, and we constantly expect to die a certain way but we never do. And I've never heard of someone actually dying of anxiety...

      I meditate at times, sometimes when things get too overwhelming I do a bit of yoga exercises...

      I also go to CBT, so I also have other tools I could use..

      Thank you so much and I wish you the best of luck!!

      Xoxo

  • Guest
    Guest ronnie27968

    Posted

    Do you have a therapist or a counsellor or someone who can help?
    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 Guest

      Posted

      I have CBT sessions... Which really help.

      I've tried a few techniques and the CBT seems to be helping me the most..

    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 Guest

      Posted

      Because my therapist made me start doing this I was terrified of doing.

      And also the technique is really helpful.. At least I found it very helpful...

      Xoxo

    • Guest
      Guest ronnie27968

      Posted

      Great to hear!

      Have you tried any other types of therapy?

  • lucy170
    lucy170 ronnie27968

    Posted

    Well done! You should be extremely proud of yourself for doing those things. I am 18 and suffer with anxiety, and many things are difficult for me to accomplish. Stay positive and remember worrying only makes the symptoms worse

    Take care

    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 lucy170

      Posted

      Thank you so much!

      I know... But the minute the symptoms attack, especially out of nowhere. It's hard to actually do a reality check and say, okay, I'm okay, stop worrying, this is nothing.

      You probably know what I mean...

      I wish you the best of luck!

  • christina_68845
    christina_68845 ronnie27968

    Posted

    Hi Ronnie I've had anxiety panic attacks and agrophobia for over 20 years..trust me you are doing well...even though your scared of doing these things,your still doing them...the biggest advice I can give you is not to avoid situations that scare the hell out of you...if you avoid these situations you will be come agrophobic...keep pushing yourself your doing well
    • ronnie27968
      ronnie27968 christina_68845

      Posted

      Thank you so much Christina!

      Why has it been so long? Do you go to therapy? Medication?

      I'm sorry to hear that it had been so long for you, you really don't deserve this...

      But I avoided everything for four months, and then one day I got up and said, this will not control my life, it's so unfair, and I started doing things just because every part of my body was telling me not to.

      I just really hit rock bottom I guess...

      I wish you the best of luck!

      Xoxo

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