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Since January, I've started doing things that scare me, things I used to like doing but now, due to my anxiety, can't handle.
I went on a class trip for a week, far from home and everything I know.
I went skiing with my family, in a different country, which really freaked me out.
I performed in a class play (I thought I would have to drop out, my symptoms were making me feel like I was dying).
I survived all those things, even though I thought I wouldn't.
Before I actually did those things, I thought that if I overcame it and survived it without fainting (my worst fear right now), then the anxiety would just leave me alone.
But I did all those things and the anxiety is still very much here.
I am trying to keep myself busy, so I went to a job interview and got accepted, I start work first thing next week. And I am freaking out.
I'm just SO tired of this routine, freaking out, feeling like sh*t, and then overcoming. But I'm just so tired of the before part.
How long is this gonna stay?? It's been seven months since it all started.
I am 17 years old. I got my blood checked in October and everything came back fine. I wanna get it checked again but my therapist told me not to because it's just gonna become and obsession, I think she's right...
When will this just go away? I am seriously losing hope, what if I have to live like this forever? It sure looks like it right now...
I am not going anywhere and this whole year has been a waste, all I did was worry and feel physically awful.
I just want this to go away.
Thank you for reading this, is anyone else feeling like this?
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