Wife has spondylosis - how can I support her?
Posted , 3 users are following.
Hello, I've never really been involved in any discussion board on anything, so I hope I'm doing this right. Basically, I'm looking for any advice on how to support my wife, who has cervical spondylosis. I'm also looking for any insight on what people go through emotionally with this condition, so I can be more empathetic with her. (I know sharing those feelings can be a big ask, so I understand if that's a bit off limits.) My wife was diagnosed last September, and has had two major attacks that incapacitated her. She works as a nurse, and she had to take 6 weeks off work earlier this year. She's 37, and her doctors don't know why an otherwise healthy woman has this condition. She was also on a series of drugs (lyrica, naproxen) that made her gain weight and made her feel "not herself."
I'm trying my best to support her, but I feel I'm coming up short. The last year has been a bit rocky in our marriage, as she comes to terms with this...and as I am perhaps not doing everything I could. Any help from this message board would be appreciated. Thanks.
0 likes, 3 replies
mike09523 roger05344
Posted
Hi Roger,
It's good that you are looking for advice to help with your wife's c/s.
It varies greatly from person to person. Some have tolerable pain, some are in agony with it. Also , as you stated it can have flare ups and then level out. If your wife is in a lot of pain, constantly, then until her gp can sort out med that work, she will be at her wits end. I have cervical spondylosis and cervical stenosis with myolepathy and it took 13 months to sort the pain out, sometimes mild, but usually agony, like full blown earache and toothache together, slowly grinds you down. Patience and love are needed in big portions from you as you will bear the brunt of it, how my dear wife put up with me I don't know.
I could write down my medications but not knowing the severity of your wife's pain and discomfort, as well as any med she already takes, I won't for now.
Best of luck to you both,
Mike.
roger05344 mike09523
Posted
Thanks Mike!
She seems to have a low buzz of pain pretty frequently. It annoys her but she can deal with it. She recently had a CT-guided cortisone shot, but she says it didn't feel like it made her any better. She hasn't had a bad flare-up since December 2016.
But the condition is always on her mind. I suppose that may be what I need help with the most. I know I need to step up when she has a flare up (help with kids, do more housework, etc), but I'm at a loss how to comfort her emotionally and mentally. I feel like anything I say will be trite or meaningless. The more posts I read on this site, the more I realize that I will never truly understand what she's going through. So how can I be there for her? Anything that your wife did for you to help you through the emotional pain? (Hope that's not too personal a question.)
-roger
mike09523 roger05344
Posted
Cannot lift anything, no diy, lost my business, my wife having to do almost everything for me. But despite all this we came through together. You just need to be there for her and try not to get hurt when/if she turns on you. Patience and understanding.
Mike.