Wife of 6 years just tested positive for Herpes type 2, I am negative. What should I do?

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We have been married for 6 years, I haven't cheated on her & she says the same. We have a 4 year old boy together.

Over the past year she has had outbreaks every couple months & got tested about 6 months ago figure out what the breakout was. Turns out it was herpes hsv-2. I looked further into it & figured it could have been dormant from either one of our pasts & just assumed I had it as well.

A week ago I decided to get tested & I am negative.

Can someone please explain this, the only conclusion I have come to is she has cheated on me within the past year & managed to get genital herpes.

She swears up & down, even though everything points to it, that she has been faithful. Is there seriously any other possible way this could be. Could she really have had this the whole 6 years being together, gave birth to our son & I magically by God's grace haven't caught it despite having unprotected sex 1-2/week?

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5 Replies

  • Edited

    hi Eric im not sure I can give you many answers but im sorry to hear this and i am in pretty much the same boat except its my husband of 8 years who has it and I am negative. he only had one outbreak (that i know of) two years ago. it can stay dormant for many years so i guess you would have to decide if you can trust her word or not. Do you have any reason to believe she has cheated? It might be a case of deciding if you can remain in a relationship where you can never find out the truth. Something I am trying to decide still myself. Very difficult situation when children are involved.

  • Posted

    hi from reading up on it it can stay dormant for many years or she may not have had an outbreak until now . also you can test negative thru blood and still have it a lot of people have gone thru that

    • Posted

      I understand it can take years for an outbreak to happen. But once you have the virus,the antibodies show up in your blood like 4-6 weeks later. I've taken 2 blood tests this past week & both are negative.

      I believe the negative blood tests you are referring to, is people who just recently got the virus, which it takes time for the body to produce the anti bodies.

      We have had sex 500+ times in the last 6 years, I don't see how I could not have gotten it if she really did have it almost 7 years ago.

    • Posted

      the blood tests can be negative even if you have it. i really recommended posting your post on reddit /herpes because they can give you better knowledge and insight about it than me

  • Posted

    If she's had it the entire time I'd say you are pretty lucky. I got it when I lost my virginity. Gave it to my next partner from about 20 seconds of contact before we stopped, then gave it to my next the first time we had unprotected sex. I've had 3 partners, got it from one, gave it to two others. From my experience it's extremely contagious. I do not have a lot of luck though.

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