Worried, no one to talk to

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I have got a breast lump to my left breast, had a hysterectomy 5 months ago, still have my ovaries, been to see GP and I am waiting to go for a mammogram at Breast clinic, l feel pain round my left shoulder on and off, GP assured me it could be a fibro adenoma, have had these in my twenties, had them removed twice, I am 48the waiting is stressful, have only got back to work after 3 months off post hysterectomy, now l am supposed to be at work the day I'm booked for mammogram, don't want to say anything yet at work, my daughter is only 17, she only has me, her dad died some years ago, and I don't want to tell her anything yet but I feel like I'm gonna break down, being xmas I just don't want to burden people, im in a dark place, just some encouragement to keep going is all I need.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    You poor thing - please try not to worry.  I too had a lump when I was much younger and had it removed.  Now I have a couple in my left breast and one in my right.  I just got a letter today for my mammogram.  I agree that waiting is the worst.  However, be assured that GP's see these things all the time and if they thought there was anything serious to worry about you would have been given an appointment in a few days.

    It is awful when you feel responsible being a one parent family.  Again, I too am a widow so know what it is like to worry about my kids should something happen to me.  My husband died when they were just starting school, so its been a long time.  Luckily my boys are now 22 and 21 so this time that worry is off the table. I think that the chances of being fibrous adenoma is very high.  For both of us.  And, unlike so many people the world over, we do have a NHS.  We are being seen by qualified medical staff quickly and they will be very thorough with us.  Christmas is such a stressful time anyway and this on top is probably making you crazy.  However, there is absolutely nothing you can do till they mammogram is done.  Try to give yourself a wee pamper night and focus on having the best Christmas ever with your daughter.  She can pick up on your anxiety and kids always think it is something to do with them.  Go Christmas shopping.  Take your daughter ice skating.  See a pantomime or an ice show.  Be good to yourself and take care of your wee family.  As for work, tell them it is a follow up if you don't want to go into the reason for the appointment.  In a way it is because it is all to do with your reproductive bits.

    Finally, having had a hysterectomy recently it is understandable to have these wee lumps.  Your body has gone through a tremendous change recently (no pun intended)

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    • Posted

      Thanks so much, I feel better already, after reading your reply, it's really put my thoughts back on track, I felt as if I was gonna crumble, come to think of it I'm a nurse myself but nothing prepares you to be on the other side, I'm actually getting ready to go for a night shift, you have no idea what this reply has done to me. I came across the site by chance when I was googling about lumps, no words ca describe how grateful I am, my appointment is Monday so this weekend I will do as you say, maybe put the xmas tree up, it is good to know there are good people out there, I wasn't even expecting replies so soon, thank you so much, will keep you posted, take care.
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    • Posted

      I am glad I replied!  My appointment is next Thursday 17 so we will probably get our results at a similar time. Sorry for a short reply but I am just having dinner.  I fancied kids food - so, fishcakes and chips!  (And it is yummy!)  let me know how you get on Monday and good luck with the Christmas tree.

      Linda x

       

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  • Posted

    Sorry, I posted before finishing.  Shamu, try to relax a bit and focus on something else - Christmas is ideal.  I will let you know what happens with me, and you can keep me abreast (haha) of any developments with you.  Take care.

    Linda x

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  • Posted

    Hi Shamu,

    Don't know if you will see this but no other way to contact you.  Just want you to know that I am thinking about you and wishing you good luck tomorrow with your mammogram.  Let me know how you get on.

    Linda x

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    • Posted

      Hie Linda,

      Sorry for late reply, managed to get through the weekend, BF came to stay over the weekend, Monday morning arrived for my appointment 30 minutes late due to traffic, got so overwhelmed as I got in, eyes welled up, was on my own, BF offered to go with me but l just wanted to be on my own so that I can remain focused, It was so intense, didn't realise they did mammogram, USS, and biopsy all on same day, they were so lovely at the clinic, especially the ultrasonographer and her assistant who did the USS, she assured me that the chances are it's an innocent lump, the lady who did my mammogram was great, it's quite an uncomfortable procedure but she talked through everything, was there for almost 2 hours, so on Friday I get my results, the staff there were great, even asked to use their phone to call work as l was running late, managed to tell my manager, very supportive and apparently she has been through it as well, she knows exactly how l feel, it makes a difference you speak to someone who has been there before, at least you know you are not alone, got days off wed and thur so will try not to stress about the results, and take a day at a time, will think about you Thursday, will probably catch up then after you have been, take care, Bee x

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