Worrying about the future! Help?

Posted , 3 users are following.

Hi there,

Not sure how this works fully as it's my first time here, but I suppose I'll just go ahead!

I'm 20 years old, suffer from social & general anxiety. For approximately two years I'd spent a lot of my time hiding away from the world, to a point where sometimes I wouldn't leave the house for a few months on end, but I'm slowly starting to get myself back together. I have ambitions to go to university next year to study wildlife conservation; if there is a positve to my anxiety it is that it has helped me to finally decide what I want to do as a career. However, I'm always comparing myself to where my peers will be currently. They'll have progressed a lot more than me in university, while I've just wasted two years. I know my anxiety has been a barrier in progressing my life beyond where it is now, but I still feel like a failure for missing so much. I've recently started volunteering at a place that does a lot of conservation work, which although still fills me with a lot of anxiety, is slowly getting better and will be a huge help in getting me to where I want to be. Although I'm working now so I'll be ready for next year, I still end up comparing where I am now to where my former friends are now and become incredibly anxious as a result. It just keeps going round and round in my head and I start feeling sick and my heart beats incredibly fast. I'd just like to know if there's any way I could stop this mind frame? I don't have anybody who I could talk to really in person, so here I am!

Also, how can I talk to people normally when my mind is on overdrive around them? I always feel like I seem antisocial, because I often don't know what to say when I panic and end up giving abrupt one word answers. There's this really nice guy at my volunteering place and I'd love to be able to just speak to him without getting all flustered.. it's been a long time since I've had a proper friend and I'm worried I'll never be able to make a friend if I come across in that way all the time and feel as I do around people. I'm always conscious of my skin as well as I've always felt it looks really bad and have had nasty comments from people in the past; it has always been a problem and I avoid looking at people directly. Not sure if this is relevant but it contributes to my social anxiety in a big way.

Finally, I've previously had CBT for my social anxiety about a year and a half ago, but struggled to keep the effects lasting. Just wonder what your opinion is on me possibly going back? I know I'm pushing myself to do things outside of my comfort zone, but I still always feel anxious. I also feel self conscious about going back as I've already been before, and failed to get myself well the first time round and don't want to be judged.

Well, thank you for any help!

Jas smile

0 likes, 6 replies

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    May I ask what do you have such major anxiety about?
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    • Posted

      Social situations. Making a call, meeting new people, writing an email, replying to this, that sort of thing. Or it often comes on out of knowhere for no particular reason. My anxiety is major for all of those situations, in short I just want to know if there's a way I could control it more in relation to what I listed above in my first post. It used to be a lot worse, but it still stops me from doing basic things like making a phone call or just saying hello to someone. Sorry, muddled my original post together a bit hoping it would make clear what I'm anxious about, but it didn't work!

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    • Posted

      Wow, social anxiety barely hear about it much sorry to hear you have it. As of dealing with it I'm not sure, do you have anyone you trust? If so I would really try and get them to help you socially take their advice, practice with them etc.

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    • Posted

      Unfortunately not many; it's difficult as the people I do trust are shy, so even they aren't really comfortable with others themselves even though it isn't on a scale as big as mine. It'd be great if I knew someone more outgoing who could help with it. Maybe I could speak to someone where I volunteer, although getting up the courage to do that is another story! Thank you for the reply btw, even though you aren't familiar with social anxiety I appreciate it!

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  • Posted

    Jas,look how far youve come. You should feel good. Think of it this way..it helped you decide your career and future plans. Its brave to work through anxiety issues,so keep moving forward and all will fall into place. Xx
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  • Posted

    Actually I think social anxiety is very common.
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