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I think when you have problems with your head you are truly alone. Last time I posted on this site I got a reply from Patient saying "you are not alone", they then told me to see my GP or call the Samaritans. I know why. It is part of the "duty of care" that Drs talk about. I once told a Dr that her duty of care was just words, she was offended although I was not being rude. I just mean that if I am found at the bottom of a multi story car park she can say that she passed me on or gave me advise, just like Patient did. It is a duty of care ok, but not to me. I am so unwell, it is getting worse, my wife tells me that the things I think are happening have not. I can not get help from CMHRS because I have an ASD diagnosis so I am on my own. Every time I try and get help something goes against me. I even had a Hospital get me investigated by the Army once, I knew what had happened because of something they did to my phone that I noticed so I have to wipe it, put loads of anti malware apps on it and get a new SIM. But I have nothing to hide so why they want to do this I do not know. I did something really bad to myself once and the A&E would not let me leave until a Psychiatric nurse saw me. The funny thing is at the end he summarised what had happened to me and it was so weird because he described it in such clarity, better than I even understood it myself and I got really scared because I did not think he was going to let me go but when he said will you do this again I did not say I would, and with that I actually managed to walk out. But looking back I am not sure this was a good thing. 25 years ago I was treated on the ward and they really helped me but this is not something they seem to b willing to do anymore. I do not know what to do because I just can not go back again. I am not sure it is right for me to do something else bad to myself at the moment. Why does this happen? it is like all the campaigns for mental health are just for show, it is how people get votes for things they want. I can not see any evidence that it really helps people.
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