117 days now

Posted , 7 users are following.

Hi it been 117 days on 23mg diazepams tapering going really slow. I keep getting women trouble every 2 weeks. I can't believe how many people can do this better than me. Some days I will get out never far. And the next day i feel so ill jelly leg's arms. And the head ache are bad. I'm my the only one who has been so long tapering . Keep feeling like I need the toilet. Front teeth hurting is this normal. I don't think I can drop mg s this close to Xmas. But then i feel bad cos that's means longer on 23mg i bloody hate this feeling.

Regards shell

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  • Posted

    Hi Shell

    To put your mind at ease no your not the only one.  I went 9 months coming off slowly but felt like sh*t the whole time tried everything I did get to zero but just kept feeling worse and worse until i ended up in hospital but I probably came off quicker than you so you prob dont have to worry about seziures.  I don't no what to say to make you feel better.  I think you would be surprised how many are going thru what you are.   It's the hardest thing ive ever tried to do and at the end of 10 -11 months i simply went to my doc and said Ive had it i only have to options, to die or go back on these things, my tolerance had lowered but he put me back on and i was not just saying it to get what i wanted.  No life at all.

    Dont drop any more esp before xmas, and dont feel like your weak if I were you I'd actually ask to go on a different benzo perhaps Clonazepam or xanax if you can, I promise you that will give you relief and you can begin to live your life, its a mental disease.  My doc said if you had  a broken arn would you get it operated on and put in a  cast?  I said yes, he said same thing something is wrong in the brain waves and delicate pathways so you need to treat it.  Suicide should not be an option so ask for help.  Diazepam is also not a very strong benzo its just longer acting you need something stronger at present get on to get on  an even keel and go from there but you nee some  relief and your brain and body (womans problem) needs a break.  Don't be ashamed, Doc's put you on this stuff so ask for help and write everythng your experiencing down,you forget once your in there, most Good docs are astonded by how you have been EXISTING only  existing and thats  no life.

    Some reductions can take years and should be making you feel better, thats the whole point so im not saying stay on them for the rest of your life buy you need a different and stroger med.  PLS SEE YOUR DOC, you will be so glad you did. if you get a doc that wont help be strong and find another, and let it out the sweating the shaking the headache, no eating, wanting to go the toilet, digestion not working, I had paranoia, agraphoia, dont want to talk to any one, no sleep, badd thoughts and if your exp is like mine the list goes on.  Take care of your self, DO IT BABE NOW feeling good at xmas.

    All the very best my dear, let me no how you go if you can.   Your not along and your not crazy.   Nicky.  Once you feel a little better Research it there are better ways of coming off.  xx

     

    • Posted

      Hi my doctor won't put me on anything else. I take 150mg sertreline in the morning and evening 40mg amitripytline she says this help. Once i stop the amitripytline just to see if they helps. And my anxiety went high. I really don't want any more med's as they have bad side effects on me. My doctor always said i am sentenced to drugs. Some days I will get out drve go shopping. And out of the blue I'm back in bed feeling crazy and spinning out. Them good days is what helps me knowing this is how I should be feeling. It's just hitting that brick wall make you realise how much you miss the little things like driving shops just getting out. I wonder how many people feel like this. I have a dairy what I always write in day 2 day. And that helps when you read back. Just a long ride,

      shell

    • Posted

      Hi Shell,

      I do understand and I suppose in the long run to give you something stronger will help you now but you would have to stop within a month.

      I know how bad you are feeling but to hear you say you do have the odd good day is so positive. as you no usually you dont so you are coming along, it's just time and the thought of ohhhGod not another day.

      Believe me many people out there feel this way or worse, i no that does not help you now but honey you have done a lot of hard hard work and I thinknow you may be getting somewhere.  I really hope your feeling better than last time you wrote.  Try have a good xmax.  Don't no about what Pat said in going too slow I did not think that's how it works but i could be wrong.  I would not drop any more before xmas. Take care hun, Im on sertaline and coming of Clonazepam just a stronger version of valium not as long acting and I'm feeling the same way.  IT'S NOT FUN AT ALL. I really do wish you well.

       

  • Posted

    hey shell

    may names paul, mmmmm its a night mare is'nt it, 25mg you say youre stuck on how much were you on before, or if its always been 25mg then it is the usual stumble dose, this is when the physical side of it starts to kick in,the added affect of the mental addiction having to swapp its self over to not wanting valium is what i call "hell fire" theres no messing about with this drug it will turn you upside down a through you about like an empty tracksuit!!!!!!! But theres two ways you go at 25mg up to 30mg to take away the usual susspects, no sleep,pins n needle skin,a liitle but wont last forever youre body will son get used to that dose aswell

    i feel youre pain shell really i do and youre right so close to xmas which is stressfull enough, i wouldnt say its the best time,i know this as am doing the same,hopefully for new year, i would contact youre GP no shame in it tell him xactly how and what youre feeling he or she maybe put you in touch with drugs worker,maybe ride out xmas put ah bit possitive thinking in the head about starting youre reduction after the year,maybe take away the stess ah bit and build youre self up to what is comming, you prob know youreself shell you need to come off these horrid little pills,but dont beat youself up about how you are feeling because its the drug not you,ha you prob dont even know who you is right now,good advise from frank reading that book is a great help theres also on called the dr Ashton plan, any book is good take youre mind some where else,make sure you also read up on the right foods and supplements to be taken

    plenty protein,Vc,and general fresh good diet,also ah know its hard but dragg youreself out for a walk once a day every day even half hr, you can do this and the rewards will be superb belive me,best wishes and have a happy xmas

    Paul

    • Posted

      Hi reading your bit made me feel better. Thanks for your post. I was 27 when I was taking these nasty pills. Ten years taken up to 48mg a day. One panic attack then ten years went by when I was taking to many when ever I want. Its been 910days i have been tapering this drug. My doctor said sorry and she will help me. My Xmas will be me not being able to get out. If i woke up tomorrow morning like this I will drop half mg.

      Regards shell

    • Posted

      Hi i must say that my Christmas wasn't good, spend the day in bed. Couldn't make it to my mum s for dinner . so my mum bought my dinner to me and took my kids to hers. So Christmas day I felt really low. So I thought right now I'm going to drop the daizepams so now i am taking 22.5mg not 23mg and on day 4 why not i am feeling s..t anyway.
    • Posted

      Hi Shell,

      Thats a shame your still feeing this way, must say that's how I felt constantly.  Do you think you feel any better since the start?

      You seem very determined, so dropping .5 should not make it worse, I understand. A friend of mine would say be on 25mg for quite a while then one day he decided to take half that amount, next day took 25mg next day took none, next day 20mg and so on, I was quite amazed at how well he went, I think by taking nothing for a day after a while a cpl days, dropped tolerance so when he took a higher dose he actually felt it, relief for a day, but still all the while dropping.  It's in your system for roughly 2-3days.  Personally I was to scared to do that but I think it was in my head.  He did this till he got to zero had a couple of very bad nights and days mainly with legs jigglying and the rest, you no.  Then one day he rang me and said I think i've done it I feel good and actually feel again.  They do say usually men handle it a little better,I think he just was strong minded and constitution and did it.  mind you he did go thru hell for a few months previous to him trying this.  It's a hard road my friend (stupid thing to say really) and I wish you all the very best as I've said before.  You are strong.   

      Nicola

  • Edited

    shell like i said earlier youre doing great pal

    nicola iam glad to here that story about youre friend very amazing story by the way

    plus there is alot i think to be said about that kinda approach youve got all the facts as youre friend obv did spot on, ive read about it,it tricks the mind which is hard to do but at 25mg the mind and brain are very vunrable to be tricked into not wanting then wanting thus not noticeing mmmm well you will feel rather edgy through this procces,but it works its a head on attack towards the valium and by god hats off to youre friend it must of been some hike that!!!!! well done mate,

    i think some times like youre friend nicola and toyou shell you have to be in control of this youreself at the "stumble dose" 25mg i think yes with a very srong head you can take control and plan youreself now, it has to be a feel good factor in itself surely,like ah duno,say someone trying to loose alot of wheight gets there ass in gear and sees the wheight cominig off they start to feel in control and push themselves, WHY to be happy in the selfs,its no diffrent to them as afterwards they must keep it up which is another battle, tho id swap this for a diet and some exercise and day of the week,hope you know what i mean, folks this is no fairy tale far from it infact its "hell fire" the worst feeling possible, but at this stage coming through xmass and all that jazz, i think everyone deserves a patt on the back and ah bit of well done heres to a new start, and lets be honest here, who got you through such a difficult time of year whom those not affected dont understand trully, you did, you were the one who how ever which way you had to YOU!!!!!! done it because its a very lonely time and place youre in during xmas and newyear esp with children shell, ha xmas dinner in bed sounds good to me hun,

    hope every one is doing good and keeping strong for 2015

    love and peace to all

    Paul

    • Edited

      Hi Paul,

      That is such a wonderful message to all of us, you are a wise man.  Yes we all got ouselves through.  We do all deserve a pat on the back.

      Thank you, You have picked up my spirits tonight, Love, Peace, and real freedom to you Paul and everyone.  Thanks.  Nicola x biggrin

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