Ahem... sex
Posted , 19 users are following.
Ok, I'm just going to put this out there. With all these debilitating symptoms we are all going through, crippling joint pain, emotional issues and family committments, does anyone actually ever feel like sex?
4 likes, 43 replies
BellaRubia AusWinnie
Posted
madcow1964 AusWinnie
Posted
For such a ...um....sore subject....this discussion really made me laugh! What a good job we can just about hang on to our sense of humour!
Been a good few years for me, too, though it's kind of mutual - no interest on either side. I know things fizzled out when I thought I should come off the Pill at about age 42.About 5 years ago I ventured to ask why we never did "it" anymore, and the reply was "You're always bleeding!". Back then, and until last October (when I hit 50), I was regular as clockwork, virtually to the day! It's just time goes so fast! Been struggling with our own business for about 10 years - so many financial issues - plus he works for a comapny under the self employment banner, and the stresses are even worse, with finances hardly any better. So it's no wonder relations are as friends and colleagues only (I know exactly where you're coming from, Shaznay!)
Apart from financial issues and crumbling home issues, I seem to have been going through peri for a few years without knowing it! We are all made aware of hot flushes and dryness down there....but nobody ever told us about all the other crazy issues! About 4/5 years ago I started getting overwhelming feelings of worthlessness and depression, and hubby was often (vocally) unpleasant. I had many suicidal thoughts (not severe enough to even get close to going through with it) but I had 2 beautiful, cloe friends who kept in frequent touch by text and phone calls, and they both kept me from the brink. I also had hot flushes, without sweating, mostly just a red face and neck, plus drenching night sweats around period time.
For years I seem to have had awful memory and concentration issues. It was only whn I found this forum about 18 months ago, that I realised hormones had started going haywire, although my symptoms were mild. Just before my 49th birthday I spent 5 whole days crying for no good reason, from the first day of my period, so I finally saw my doc who put me on Fluoxetene. I tried a few each month for 3 months, but I got a temporary Christmas job and my self esteem shot up and my moods lifted and I haven't touched the pills since, in spite of mood swings (did someone say "homicidal"??? Yup!).
Ayway, I digress! Batty old woman rambling on - hbby just rolls his eyes and carries on! Doesn't want to get into health discussions, especially potentially embarassing ones! Mind you, he has to listen to female customers of a certain age, filling him in with their embarasssing ailments!! Ha ha!! Bless him, he has a lot of stress to contend with, on all sides, so it's hardly any wonder that, between us, we can't even contemplate the S word! Hit the big 5 oh and periods started misbehaving - just had 3 periods in under 2 months so have no idea what to expect next!
I seem to be a bit slow on the uptake - after months of shoulder problems it is only in the last few minutes that I have twigged that it could be down to peri! Just the act of putting my hands on my ample hips is difficult and painful for my right arm!. Think I broke my little toe yet again, stubbing it on something as I can't seem to walk in a straight line anymore!
Anyway - I shall leave you with this gem I recently found in a 1930's health tome - during a certain transition time in a woman's life, she may lose all interest in relations or....she may become SO desperatelt interested that she becomes a nuisance to any man in her vicnity and will have to be locked up in an institution until the crisis passes and she returns to her normal self!!
mel64317 madcow1964
Posted
One dear friend of mine in her 80s today, doesn't even remember her memopause happening ( not dementia ! Just had no issues..) and another friend has had horrible symptoms for the last 10 years....
My advice ? Keep a diary of feelings and symptoms...share this with your partner, friends and health professionals, and if in trouble YELL out till someone listens to you and helps you get some releif..
big hugs ladies .....we've got this we can do it.. 💝 xx
shaznay96184 madcow1964
Posted
Seriously, a friend of ours was feeling low in her early 40s. She had 3 kids, worked F/T, felt constantly knackered and had absolutely no interest in sex.....much to her husband's sagrine.
Took herself off to the GP who took some bloods. Found she was completely depleted in Testosterone!! She was given a small dose, for a short time, and things certainly changed.
I vividly remember the 4 of us chatting on a jolly, drunken night, all sharing stories,and her husband telling me that she wouldn't leave him alone!!
She confirmed that she felt really horny all the time, and he sometimes knocked her back.
Moral of this Story: be careful what you wish for boys!!!!
(Funny really, because we are spoon-fed Oestrogen and Progesterone: we rarely hear of how very low Testosterone affects us, especially regarding sex drive. Mind you, it should be mentioned that she developed a fantastic Adam's Apple, deep voice and a terrific Goatie tee, hee!!!
(I gest of course
))
Sx
shaznay96184 mel64317
Posted
She was in a L/T relationship at this time, and I recall her saying that 'the sex is great on HRT'!!
I remember a particularly horrible time, however, where even I could see she had 'classic' Menopausal symptoms, alongside her being given a real cocktail of anti-psychotic drugs. The 'demons' were being dealt with but not the depleted hormones!
There alone I suppose lies my deep dislike of the use of SSRIs/ADs alone to treat menopausal symptoms. I believe my sister's mental health was seriously affected by having the safety net of her HRT snatched away from her. Afterall menopause relates directly to hormonal imbalance not chemical imbalance.
Enough of my rantings.
*Suffice to say that the rest of us were a lot less 'whollier than thou': we smoked, all of us drank, flirted(!), some rarely exercised and some ate crap. I suppose Life's a Bitch - but definitely there to be lived!!
Moniee shaznay96184
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Moniee madcow1964
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madcow1964 Moniee
Posted
Anyway, I was sitting quietly in Morrisons at lunchtime when I suddenly had a dizzy spell. It felt as if the inside of my head was spinning, and I was surprised when I looked around and the images appeared normal! However, I did begin to feel like part of me wasn't there (I am not mentioning THAT to hubby!!), I was sort of detached from things for 30 seconds or so. I hadn't eaten breakfast and only had a cup of tea (no sugar), until I sipped some full-fat Coke - and that's when the dizziness hit...
So....purely low blood sugar? Purely dodgy hormones? Or a combination of both? I often seem to get a bit squiffy (such a lovely word!) for no good reason.
Just been watching 30 Years of Neighbours, and I'm sorry Scott & Charlene - I'm just not up to reliving your memorable wedding now it's after the witching hour!
Nitey nite x
Oh all right ..... such a sucker for romance! Gosh, don't they all look so young?!
mel64317 shaznay96184
Posted
Thank GOD they now are starting to recognise the issues..! At the most challenging time of our lives for some of us, we need qualified proffessionals to help us make the RIGHT decisions....as in some cases women have been robbed of their normal reason due to hormone imbalance....not fair...and we deserve better....
Good luck ladies !!!💝
shaznay96184 mel64317
Posted
jacqueline08904 AusWinnie
Posted