Anxiety and fear of being alone

Posted , 6 users are following.

Okay I was told about this forum by a friend who used this for help so Im hoping it works for me too.

I have been suffering badly with anxeity and depression since October and have been on citalopram since the start of October when I had my first major panic attack. The first few weeks were insanely difficult and I was off work trying my best to keep busy, but its hard to fill the hours of the day. Gradually I managed to get back to work and solve the issues that I believe had been causing the anxiety. Everything seemed to be almost back to normal. I was still on a low dosage of citalopram 10mg and I was awaiting CBT councelling which starts in January.

But over the last week, negative thoughts began to creep back in and I tried my best to combat them. My mood went up and down so much even from minute to minute. Mornings were always hardest but the anxiety eased off towards the evenings to the point where I almost felt relaxed. But on Friday I had a mild panic attack at work and I tried as much as possible to change what I was thinking about but it had taken over by then. The weekend was so hard. I have begun having morbid thoughts about how easy it would be to hurt myself even disappear completely.

I woke up this morning and felt the same so I phoned the docs and he has put me back on 20mg of citalopram and given me something to help with sleep etc at nights and to calm me down if I have another panic attack. He explained the morbid thoughts are common with anxiety. I have started to develop a fear of being alone which im hoping is just a side effect of the anxiety as well. Has anyone else had similar symptoms? As with everyone else I have it in my head im the only one feeling like this. Thanks for reading this and I really appreciate any help. This has been the hardest few months of my life and I would never wish it on my worst enemy.

0 likes, 27 replies

27 Replies

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  • Posted

    Yes!!! In fact today is my first day alone in 2months and I feel awful sad xx
    • Posted

      Its horrible feeling Rachel so i know how you feel sad It scares me which raises my anxiety levels I used to enjoy being by myself but now I cant remember how that feels xx
    • Posted

      Ive never really had dizzy feelings. I feel like I am in a bubble and others around me seem distant if that makes any sense
    • Posted

      Yep that's right! I say dizzy coz my head is running but no not dizzy as in off balance. I feel disconnected/spaced out/like I'm in a bubble or a glass box. Totally loose myself all most as if I'm under water. Does this make sense? Iv had it 2months daily now and its bloody awful was someone could tell me when it will go away. I'm not letting it bother me as much now so fingers crossed! I blame the meds but I had it before them too so...... 
  • Posted

    Yea ross.we are exactly like you.having diffrnt panic attacks from head to toe.sometimes it countinues for many hours n days.i had perfect days for a while but now i am in my panic attacks days again.hope we all get back to our good days.
    • Posted

      How long do your panic days normally last for? Like you say I was back to having perfect days almost and now back in the panic days. It was this time last I started to worry again and it was like I was sitting on a fence, just waiting to fall off either side into a total panic attack again. And thats exactly what happened this weekend.
    • Posted

      Well it depenes.sometimes i had been on panic attacks for a week n maybe more.but sometimes just for 2 days n then suddenly u get oh yea all those terrible attacks n feelings r disappeard.only thing we should know that we need some time n then they go away.but during those attacks its realy awful time:-(
    • Posted

      Feels like it will never go! Not had a break of the glass box since a attack end of October. 
    • Posted

      Heya rachel.i am sure it would be last days of ur panic days.some month ago i had a long time panic attacks too but it finishd finaly.urs will go away soon too.
  • Posted

    I think 10mg is too low also and u might have had side effects from the increase which hasn't settled yet maybe xx

    • Posted

      Im hoping the increase will help settle me down after a bit. I started on the 20mg, then went down to 10 when i started to feel better and from today im back on the 20mg.

      I used to take them at 5pm everyday and slowly have drifted them towards first thing in the morning. Not sure if this can have an affect? I have read people saying just before bed can be the best time to take them as it helps them get to sleep so I might try this. I have trouble staying asleep and get a maximum 5 hours sleep each night but always waking up every hour almost.

    • Posted

      I think the doctors say once u feel normal u need at least 6months treatment from there. I stop on mine 5years and felt normal. This time on fluoxetine I feel rubbish at 5weeks but I'm hoping it will pass. I just feel in a constant bubble and I can't wait to reconnect with the world and my loved onessad I know how you feel! I take it at night and I don't sleep much but if I take it in the day I'm dazed x
  • Posted

    It is hard and my anxiety was bad enough post divorce despite my orginal anxiety been related to a bad marriage

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