Anxiety still so high

This is normal Victoria. Ups and downs. Just enjoying the up periods and look forward to when they become more frequent. Because they will.

I ve been a bit better the last few days

Don t feel right, not relaxed but not terribly anxious either. Feels a bit limbo like. Feel very fragile and a bit agoraphobic and overwhelmed but been an ok few days.

What I find hard is I feel like I am waiting for the anxiety to return and constantly looking for signs of it.

How are you ?

Hi yesterday I felt sick most of the day, today my anxiety has been more prominent. Can't win! The anxiety just hasn't gone today. I really want this citalopram to work, but it's 8 weeks now and I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere. Some days I can be fairly ok in the afternoons but others I feel are like a constant battle. I look forward to the evenings because it seems to melt away then, but then I dread it because it's closer to another morning and they are just awful. I just want out of this vicious cycle xx

Hi Victoria

Can I ask a few questions?

1. Are you, or have you done CBT or any other therapy along with your medication?

2. Are you working presently?

3. Do you have family or friends support?

4. Do you spend less of time thinking about how you feel?

Sorry for the questions but the more we know the more we may be able to give good advice.

Alex

I have been on cit for 11 weeks now. 3 weeks at 40. I have felt an improvement but these last 4 weeks have been really hard

I do find not focusing on the feelings helps. Anxiety is a trap that we keep ourselves in by feeding it. Harder said than done and a massive battle.

Really hoping gor a better week for both of us x

Hi Alex

Yes I am doing cbt, had 3 sessions with a private therapist and just got access to the NHS online course. I've been signed off work for the last 8 weeks, back at Drs tomorrow for another sick note!

I have lots of support from family and friends and I do think a lot about how I feel, though I do try to just get on with things. My cbt therapist started me practicing acceptance last week, which I'm trying my best with.

Mornings are the worst with the anxiety and I wretch every morning. I can't eat and I'm surviving on protein shakes. I've lost 2 stone in 7 weeks. I had loads of side effects when I started taking the citalopram and got them again when I upped the dose to 30mgs 3 weeks ago.

Xxxx

Hi hope all are doing well just want d to see if anyone has seen an initial improvement on citalopram and then the anxiety to return not quite as bad as at beginning and will this clear over time

Hi Victoria

I do sympathise as I have been through similar.  I also have lost just short or 2 stone in 7 weeks and thought I was going to die.  I was living on Bananas and toast.  I find it weird that your doctor has upped your dosage so soon after starting.  This will make the whole process unbearable.  I thought the first two weeks on 10mg was hellish let alone going through higher doses rapidly.  

I have been been doing online CBT (silvercloud) and it has been useful.

you really have to apply yourself to get relief from this but not easy while suffering side effects from the meds.  

have to be totally selfish and do whatever makes you happy.  Examples: Massage, aromatherapy, swimming, deep breathing, tense and relax muscles starting from your feet,  Read positive literature.

Relax relax relax.  Your brain needs to relearn that you are relaxed and not stressed.  When you feel symptoms, say "it's ok" it's ok". Accept whatever your body throws at you.  These are times when you can learn, you learn nothing when you are well.  With every lesson you learn more and you get stronger. Accept the sensations, you won't die.  Your body is doing what it thinks is natural and until it get different messages from you it will not stop.  

This disorder started with you, by your own will as it has with all of us,  likewise you can change your will and diminish the anxiety and its symptoms.  Try not to stop thinking about your symptoms, yes, think about them, welcome them, will them to get worse and worse, laugh at them, smile through them and in the end you will diminish them.  Weaker and weaker they will go.  You must believe your actions, your brain is no fool.  This is the paradoxical approach and it works.  TRUST ME.

KEEP GOING, And then some more. In the end you will be victorious if you fight the battle in the way it is to be fought.  Good luck.

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I have. About 5 weeks into 30mg I had a, return of anxiety...... 7 weeks on cit all together. After a week my dose was upped to 40mg this led to worse anxiety than before I started cit. 3 weeks after the increase I am a little less anxious but still not great or as good as before the crash.

Thanks Alex that's really useful to read. How are you feeling now? I just want to feel some improvement but I've started accepting that it will take time.

Vx

Me too.

I seem to be getting worse at over 11 weeks.

Hi Sarah how are you now? I feel much the same though I am getting some ok ish spells in the afternoons. It's so hard, I just want things to settle down and be able to function normally. I'm having cbt and trying my best to focus on the positives but do keep worrying that I won't be myself again.

I wish I could somehow stop the awful mornings so every day doesn't start on such a bad foot.

I've been on the citalopram for over 9 weeks now and it feels like a lifetime

Hi Victoria

I have gone done from 40 to 30 as of today. I ve had about 4 ok days but as of monday feel crap again. My psychiatrist thinks 40 is too much for me. Hopefully the drop to 30 will help.

I've been on cit for 12 and a half weeks. Trying not to get dishartened. I did have some good weeks on 30 so fingers crossed.

Hi Victoria, I'm struggling again at the minute, I saw the mental health nurse yesterday who has now referred me for cbt. My mum went with me too as sometimes I find it hard to explain how bad things are and put a brave face on it! He was how anxiety is habit forming and how we have to break the cycle..... easier said than done. Is that what they're trying to do at your cbt sessions??? How many have you had?? Do you work? I keep having to have time off and I only work part time as well. It is sooooo hard to keep positive but it is something we must try and do to push forward with our recovery. I keep trying to make light of some of the situations I've found myself in as its takes the power away from the anxiety. I was shaking so bad on Monday I made me and my mum a cup of tea and about spilt it everywhere. (My mum said it was like the two soups sketch with Julie Walters...google it it's hilarious if you don't know what I mean). Maybe when we message each other we can support each other when we're bad but also try and tell each other something positive we've done or something we found funny!!! Just to try and boost each other. This is something we're all going through together, anxiety is a normal emotion we all need but it's just that ours has gotten out of control and we'll all get through it and come out stronger. We can do this!! It won't be forever and then we'll appreciate being relaxed even more. Sorry for going on and on!!! Take care 😁

Hi Sarah

What dose are you on and for how long ?

I keep being td I need to break the anxiety cycle and I understand what they are saying but doing it is another matter !!!

Braking the cycle is a lot easier said than done! In my cbt I've been trying to learn to accept, but it turns out that repeating it over and over in your head is self talking not accepting! Now I've got to try to just notice and observe the physical sensations without questioning or self talking.

Why oh why isn't there something that can make it go away ????

I know, the self talking is crazy, makes you feel like you are going mad. The self talking subsides the better you start to feel. Which is clearly not yet for you. If you continue to self talk, keep it simple with "this is fine" or "it's ok"

This was me 3 weeks ago. Said to my other half I've been talking to myself in my head. This is quite normal at this stage but irritating. Doing this is better than worry or fear because it's a positive action not a negative one. You will even get tired of fooling yourself. It gets easier.

Started on 10mg for 2 weeks, then 20mg for about 6 weeks, now I've been on 30mg for nearly three weeks. Yes it is a cycle and it's flipping hard to break it because thoughts, feelings and then behaviour become habit forming. We'll all make brilliant counsellors by the time we're through! 

Hi Alex, how long have you been on the citalopram/working through the anxiety it sounds like things are going well. I do the talking to myself but know I've decided to carry a pad and pen around and I've been told to write my thoughts down and respond to them with a rational/positive answer.....I will have a novel by the end of it!!!!

Absolutely, my therapist charges me £80 per hour....... I would seriously consider doing cbt training after this!!

Looks like we're all up for a career change! I had hypnotherapy last year and that was £65 an hour. She was always completely booked and worked 9-7 everyday including Saturday's! No wonder she had a brand new sports car in the driveway lol! She was good though! Problem is the wait on the NHS is awful! Did you know it was national mental health yesterday we should have had a cake to celebrate 🙈🎂!!