Anxiety symptoms have come back!

Posted , 4 users are following.

Hi, I recently went through a hard time in my life ( my dad died) and shortly after I had exams. I went to my doctor as I started getting a ringing in my ear and weird feeling in my head. She told me both were due to stress and anxiety. She told me to join a gym as it may help with the symptoms,which it did. They completely vanished! However,I then pulled muscles in my chest which made me think I was having a heart attack. I can't go back to the gym before the muscles have healed fully. Now my symptoms are back, but not as bad. I have been trying to keep my mind off of then but even if I do for a day, when I go to bed I have problems getting to sleep worrying about my symptoms. Anyone one else have this problem? Any advice? 

Thanks Jack

2 likes, 91 replies

Report / Delete

91 Replies

Next
  • Posted

    A pulled muscle can be really painful but it is far removed from a heart attack so don't let your imagination run away with you.

    Losing a parent is heartbreaking and on top of that you had the added stress of exams. Little wonder you have anxiety disorder symptoms. Now then, you have to accept that with all you have recently endured it is no wonder you have physically and emotionally out of sorts.

    Stress causes the body to flood with adrenalin and you were ridding yourself of it by physical activity which is excellent. Now due to your injury this avenue of relief is temporarily closed. But there are other means of dispersing adrenalin. Any form of movement will suffice for the time being. Even climbing up and down the stairs, walking, whatever you are comfortable with.

    Laying in bed worrying will cause insomnia and then you are tired and the symptoms worsen.

    Acceptance. That's the key. Tell yourself, I've had an awful time so my body is reacting but if I go with it, it will eventually fade and I'll be back to my old self. Its no good trying to "escape" from the symptoms cos that's a form of avoidance fear. An inner voice that says "Go Away!  I don't like you! Leave me alone!"

    Go about your day as best you can. If you're symptoms are there tell yourself nothing bad is going to happen because nothing is, believe me.

    Buy some chamomile tea. Four cups a day Its an acquired taste but it is very calming, especially at bedtimes smile I neither believed  in it nor enjoyed the taste

    at first but now I wouldn't be without it

    All will be well!

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Thanks for your reply, I'm keeping my mind preoccupied by looking forward to going on holiday and plan on joining the gym when my muscles get better. I will give the camomile tea a go, hate the taste but if it helps me relaxed I will drink it.

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      PS, I have great faith in you. Don't ask me why cos I don't know why. I just have that's all smile And if you have setbacks take them in your stride because deep down I know you can and will get better!!!!!!!!!!!

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      You see? If mind and body are occupied there is no "room " for the symptoms! Its great you are learning to drive!

      Hope you are managing to sleep better. Did you get some chamomile? I knows it tastes like crap, lol, but it is good stuff for calming the mind and body.

      If you are still having insomnia problems when you are laid in bed use your imagination. Imagine the car you are going to get, imagine yourself on holiday...imagine a flat/house you are going to get...dreams coming true like things you want to do, the things you want out of life...anything that stretches the mind

      I say this because apart from clock watching, which is a sleep killer, or laying there stressing cos you cannot sleep or just plain worrying, it occupies the mind with healthy thoughts and like as not you'll drift off to sleep

      I say this because I'm a fiction writer. I plan all my stories whilst laying in bed trying to sleep. The imagination  is strongest when we are in bed at night and there are no outside/life distractions. I often fall asleep this way...works every time.

      I hope everything is going well for yousmile

      My faith in you unwavering!!!!!!!!!!!

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I actually had a good night's sleep last night, however, I did have a nightmare which woke me up in the middle of the night,but I just rolled over and fell back asleep.

      My physical symptoms are not as bad as they have been, but I still get that weird feeling in my head every now and again, which makes me worry. I know I shouldn't but my mind is always thinking it's something bad...like a brain tumour. I try to reassure myself because I don't have headaches or take seizures ( which are the main symptoms) but that only works sometimes. Other than that I did sleep well and my symptoms are not as bad as before

      Thanks, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      That's great news!

      Funny feelings in the head are very common, I know, but they are scarey when they are happening.

      Some symptoms tend to hang round more than others. Personally I think it's the one's we're still a bit frightened of and have a hard time reassuring  ourselves that is is down to AD and not something else

      But the thing is you are making a concerted effort, which is brilliant

      You're not struggling, which is a no-no, not fighting to make it all go away,  which is a no-no. You're beginning to accept. That's the path to recovery

      I am so damn proud of you!

      You've made my day smile

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      In fact, it has really made my day! I am going to put on some Kaiser Chiefs and tackle the ironing I've been ignoring since I rolled out of bed

      That's how good your post made me feel!!!!

      ( I love Kaiser Chiefs)

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Lol,thanks....the Kaiser Chiefs are ok....but I'm more into a band called Twenty One Pilots ( TØP) I'd say you've heard a few of their songs on the radio..( stressed out), but I'd listen to nearly all music ( except country and western...I can't stand it!)

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I too like most music. apart from country and westernm and jazz cos it does my head in!  I have eclectic tastes in most thing

      Twenty One Pilots?

      Never heard of 'em

      But then you're a young thing ( my protegee, lol )

      Me, I'm just an ole fart smile

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, I'm having a bad day today, my symptoms are bad and I can't stop worrying about them. I have that weird feeling back in my head again...and this morning I woke up and my vision was blurry. ( it's fine now ). I've tried everything but I just can't stop worrying...do you have any ideas?

      Thanks , Jack 

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      You have converted the ole fart!

      Loved Twenty One Pilots!!!!!! Stressed Out/ Ride/ Can't help falling in love, being my favourites so far!

      His voice is awesome, it has a kind of echo to itsmile

      So, the ole fart thanks her protegee

      Just goes to show, you're never too old to learnsmile

      Hope you're hanging in there!!!!!!!!!!!

      Momma hugs from Helen

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Oh dear! Just replied and the moderated has blocked it sad Don't know why.. well I might have cussed..oops! LOL

      Anyway, here goes again

      That feeling at the back of the head is tension. It's the muscles bunching. It can lead to back of the head pain and neck pain. Make sure your shoulders are relaxed, okay? When this happens to me a good hot shower helps as does brushing the back of your neck and head  with a hairbrush, to promote blood flow and loosen the muscles.

      I know it's freaky when your head feels funny but it's quite common. I get it a lot. Ride it out honey, nothing bad is going to happen to you

      Vision blurring is also common. But that too is scarey when you first have it. If you just carry on it will soon pass. But the more you panic and think, I can't see properly! the longer it will hang around.

      You're having a setback is all. Everyone has them. Sometimes it can be due to tiredness of mind or body or both, sometimes the "memory " of what we are coping with tricks into fear again. Also, make sure you are properly hydrated. Dehydration can cause a number of issues  so get plenty of fluids down you

      I know how disappointing setbacks can be. But you're not going to be stuck in that setback forever.

      Try to stay calm. Do what you need to do but don't rush round hoping to "escape"

      Nice, slow and relaxed, okay?

      Mummy hugs from your very own, personal ole fart smile

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Forgot to ask, Is it a feeling of pressure? Cos if it is that's common too. When I first had it I panicked and ran to the GP's at 90 miles an hour only to find it was tension pressure!rolleyes Me, I was thinking brain tumour, as you do with the vivid imagination that AD creates..sigh

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      That's the feeling I had when I first felt it and ran to the GP! I swear to God I thought something in my head was going to explode! It was awful sad

      That, I might add, was 30 years ago and look at me! Still here, living La Dolce Vita to Kaiser Chiefs and Twenty One Pilots!

      That should tell you something Jack smile

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Full head? Yes, that's about right. Sorry, I was in such a rush to reply I didn't explain properly. I meant the cause usually starts in the neck with muscle tension and affects either the neck and back of head or, I SHOULD HAVE ADDED, the whole head!

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Lol, I did the same thing, I went straight to my doctor who told me it was stressful..I have noticed that watching funny shows and movies helps with my symptoms..I dunno if it's the same for everyone.

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Sometimes it's a feeling of pressure. It deppends on how stressed I am. Sometimes it's just a weird feeling...hard to explain and then if I am really stressed it is head pressure and some times it's Luke a dizziness

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Well new things pop up, believe you me

      I suppose the worst thing is not knowing how to ignore this "new" thing whatever it is..well, we know what it is, it's an offshoot of AD.

      But when we have, say, measles, it's measels, right? Everyone knows what to do. We have an answwer and a remedy right there and then. But with AD

      All manner of odd bodily symptoms can pop up.  We have to avod asking ouselves for theThe whys and the wherefores, Cos we won't get an answer. Wre just have to let them come and let them go, Jack, let them flow and not fear them

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Well I got vaccinated for measles in primary school...a booster a few years ago..I think. I know there was a measles outbreak about 250 km from me a few months ago
      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      How dare you google your symptoms! You bad boy!

      Googling symptoms can throw you into a frenzy of fear. You'll find you're dropping to bits from head to toe with every illness known to man It takes someone with full medical training to arrive at a correct diagnosis!!!

      Bad, bad boy!

      Hypothyroidism my ass!

      If you fear that or if you've got that idea in your head get thysen to the GP

      Silly boy smile

      But I forgive you..naturally

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I know.... I shouldn't have done it...they only show the rare diseases and conditions...I remember reading an article saying that 90% of the time..Google is wrong..I would believe it, some of the things they said I had.

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I've spent the whole evening worrying about my symptoms..I can't stop thinking that my doctor should've sent me to get a MRI or some other scan...I know this probably sounds stupid as if she thought something was wrong, she would've sent me in. The only thing I keep telling myself is that my symptoms have not got worse...

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Aw Jack! It's not going to fade if you sit there freaking out over it dear. I know you think, Oh, it's easy for her to say! I'm the one suffering! But I honestly care enormously because I've had something very similar and I know how frightened I was until I sort of got my right thinking head on. And I feel a bit helpless here cos I cannot do anything to calm you down other than to say...

      Take pro-active action. Making a decision can bring ernormous relief. If you feel  in your heart, that for your own peace of mind,  you need a scan,, go see the doctor as soon as possible.. Tell her/him exactly how you feel and he/she will probably arrange a scan

      I don't think you realze how much you have been through emotionally lately. Losing your Dad, exams. Trying to cope. Trying to carry on regardless.

      It all puts a toll on mind and body.

      So don't wonder why you're all over the place! How can you not be? But you have to rein in your imagination where  life threatening illnesses are concerned. It's right back to accepting. Accepting you're mentally/physically weary. Like a guitar string wound too tight. It twangs. Well so do your nerves when you are stretched to the limit.

      Nothing bad isn going to happen to you.

      Positives? as follows

      You can sleep.

      You can eat.and take in fluids

      You can walk

      You can talk

      You can hear and see

      Your body is functioning as it should but....but the pattern of the function has a few malfunctions in the sense that the adrenalin in you, flooding your system, brings with it fear and panic,

      You can do this. YOU CAN

      I know it. You just have to believe it

      Get back to me if things are still rough, okay?

      Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner Was in the shower

      Mummy hugs from ye ole fart

      xxxx

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Thanks Helen, this really helped me! I was just talking to aanother person on this forum who has try exact same feeling in his head as I do, he told me that breathing exercises help, I tried then and they actually work! I'm trying to drink another cup of chamomile to help me sleep...I think I'm starting to get used to the taste

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Dear Jack! I'm glad you're feeling a bit calmer. Shallow breathing or gulping in air ( and you can do it without even realizing it) is the curse of AD.

      Never ever inhale and let your lungs expand. You have to breathe in through your nose, making sure your belly bloats, lol, exhale slowly and for as long as you can, to expel as much air as you can

      They do say breathing in and out of a brown paper bag held over nose and mouth works, standard quick remedy for overbreathing and great for out of the blue panic

      But you have to learn the right way to breathe and to do it naturally without even thinking about it. I used to practive when I was trying to get to sleep. I'd lay flat and start the breathing excercise, playing my hands on my tummy to make sure it rose up as I inhaled

      Aren't people great the way they extend the helping hand? I'm happy someone rushed in to help you.

      Now get the pig swill....I mean chamomile tea, lol, down your neck! And chill

      Goodnight my protegee!!!

      And keep in touch cos I'm on tenterhooks over you smile

      Mummy hugs

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, the last few days have been great ( symptoms wise ). I've kept myself busy and have been trying not to think about my symptoms. All I've had is a slight headache, but I'd say that was caused by the humid weather we're having. I've gone off the thoughts of me having a brain tumour, as even saying it now, makes me feel like an idiot for even googling it. ( Dont worry, I'm not googling symptoms anymore because DR.Google is never true ). The weird feeling in my head has gone, but it's still kinda there at the same time...but other than that everything is good,I better go as the dinner is about to burn

      Hope to talk soon, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Great stuff! I'm about crying here! Well done! I'm so proud of you my chest is swelling so much I'm going to have to buy bigger bras! LOL

      Enjoy your dinner

      keep in touch

      Yipeeeeeeeeee great, just damn great!

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, today was a good day, but I had that spaced out feeling. I went back to the gym and dice then have been feeling great, my head feels a bit better but its still there. Also, my vision was blurry this morning.

      Other than that, today was fine. This is a weird question but do you have to have panic attacks with anxiety? Or do only some people have them? Also, how do you know if you had a panic attack?

      I don't think I've had one, but I was thinking about it today. 

      Thanking you, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hello there dear! You are doing great all things considered. Spaced out feelings are a kind of  "detachment " and don't be surprised after all you've been through. If you just see it is part and parcel of the illness, if you just accept it's there without honing in on it and letting it frighten you then eventually it will fade. See it as, for instance, like itchy plaster on a broken legs. It's a necessary evil on the road to recovery. It's much the same with blurred vision that comes and goes. Calm acceptance that it will go away once you accept it but don't allow it to freak you out or delude you into thinking something bad is happening to you.

      Panic attacks. I used to have them until I realized what they were and how to deal with them. You'd know if you had one. It's a sudden, terrible crushing feeling of fear. Your heart races, you gasp for air, you feel lightheaded, your legs tremble. The flood of adrenalin releases the Fight or Flight response in your body, a most unpleasant sensation.

      Not everyone suffers panic attacks with Anxiety Disorder. It depends upon the individuals ability to cope with the symptoms of anxiety. If the symptoms freak them out, they pile on the fear and bang! panic attack.

      I truly believe that had I known at the time what was happening to me when I first had Ad I wouldn't have had to cope with panic attacks on top of everything else, But there was so little information and understanding in those days and by the time I had sought my GP's help and was given medication, my AD was firmly entrenched

      There is no reason why you should add Panic Disorder or fear it raising it's ugly head.

      You have the little box of tools . It comes back to accepting exactly what is wrong with you and not freaking out and imagining it's something life-threatening. It's about not shrinking and fearing the symptoms. It's about "right" breathing. Keeping hydrated. Not skipping meals. It's about moving the body to flush out the adrenalin. All these tools keep panic at bay and batter down the symptoms

      And it's about talking it out. Even if it's with an ole fart like me, lol! Because bottling it up is stressful. A new symptom, an old symptom. Don't think about it. Don't worry it into the gound. Talking about it lets it go

      I think you have done great. It shows a strength and determination few AD sufferers have. That's what will see you through.

      Funnily enough I was just thinking about you yesterday! Wondering how you were. Keep in touch. I care, I really do smile

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, I have taken your advice and am keeping hydrated etc.. My symptoms have been good, the weird head feeling is not as bad. I mentioned the blurry vision to my GP who told me that it is all stress related and not to worry about it. I knew this already but it's good to hear from a professional. I've been keeping busy, going to the gym and counting down the days to my holiday. My fears of having a Brain Tumour are still there, but I just don't listen to them. I just reassure myself that it's my body dealing with stress. My doctor recommended counselling, which I plan on doing in the next few weeks, I've also noticed that I'm not the only person with anxiety that worries about having a BT, which helps me reassure myself.

      Thanks for the advice,Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Aw this is all good smile And a holiday to look forward to and time to recharge your batteries!

      Glad you saw the GP dear..now then " I Predict A Riot " ? LOL Not anymore!

      Well done, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, Just fought you might like to know I just got a 9 week old puppy. I got her off a nice woman who had about three million other dogs ( legit no joke ??). She's great during the day, but does not sleep a wink at night, and just howls and barks the whole night. I haven't slept at all in the last 48 hours with her, however we leave her to bark as its the only way to learn. I'm bringing her to the pet shop to get better food and see if they have any ideas. Let's just say she makes a big "mess" if you know what I mean. As I have not slept, my symptoms are nearly the worst they've ever been. I've been dizzy for most of today on and off. I'm currently trying to drown out the barks by listening to music . Other than that, everyone else finds her adorable ( which she is ). My cousin brought her puppy around earlier and the two of them had a great time. But she's a terror when she's alone!!! 

      Ah well, when she's trained she should be an amazing dog!

      Thanking you, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hello dear boy smile

      That's wonderful! Animals give unconditional love and are faithful. Added bonus being an animal owner is a great stress reducer. Also the puppy will give you someone to focus on which is no bad thing. Being a puppy she will depend upon you for everything and it's so rewarding taking care of a pet. I'm so pleased for you, I really AM!!!

      I take it she's piddling everywhere? Sigh. That will stop when she settles down and feels safe in her new environment...hell, even I've felt like piddling on the floor when I'm in a strange place, lol

      I'm not surprised your symptoms are battering you. Sleep is vital for recovery. AD is the most tiring of illnesses, Jack. It's damn hard work coping with the symptoms and carrying on with the day regardless...But for all that you are doing great all things considered. You could try placing a warm hot water bottle in her bed/basket at night, one wrapped up in an old sweater or T.Shirt of yours. The warmth will remind her of her Mommy and the scent of you will reassure her.

      You updating me has made me so happy and for that I thank you!

      Please, Jack, try and get some rest!

      Hugs from ye ole fart xxxx

       

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I did the hot water bottle and t-shirt tonight. She is used to not having her mother as she sadly passed away after giving birth, however I'd say she misses the other puppies as they all slept together

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I get my Kava tea at Sprouts or maybe even Jimbo's. I've cut out drinking coffee. That has been difficuly but I'm trying anything and everyting to help with the anxiety.

      ?As for tasting better than chamomille, I think so. It's a little stronger. Give it a try.

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I have noticed that my symptoms are worse on days that I've drank a lot of caffeine, I'm gonna try cut it out completely. I don't think we have Sprouts or Jimbos here in Ireland, would a normal health store ( Holland and Barrett ) .Do it?

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Oh for goodness sakes! I was told at local HB store that. Checked on google and said it was banned for the above reasons. Now I see it for sale on Amazon!!! Sorry for all this muddle....sad

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      The Foods Standards Agency here reinforced the ban I think it was last year. In the beginning retailers voluntarily withdrew it after government prompting. There had been cases of people suffering liver damage. Then it became illegal to import or sell it in England

      Personally I wouildn't drink it but don't freak out. Years ago I used to take Kava tablets and they were great for AD. I was mightily Peed off when they became unavailable...anyway, I took them for years and I'm still here, liver functioning smile

      Better safe than sorry Tip. Stick to the horse piddle..er, I mean, the chamomile. Proven safe the world over and encouraged to drink by most of the medical know-it-alls!

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Well, I don't want hat anyways lol...Although I could do with it after the stress my neighbours are putting me through. The names I call them would certainly not be allowed on this forum lol. Not only have I just lost my dad, I have those pr1cks ringing the police ( gardaí here) and saying there's a domestic disturbance!!!! All over my new puppy crying at night! I was honestly close to knocking him out earlier today, we've gone through years of cr4p from them. Now I have to go to the police station to make a complaint about them tomorrow....great. I think I'll need more than chamomile tonight. Arrgh! Now the ringing in my ears is acting up!!!!!!!!! 

      ( I put the numbers in the swear words...well kinda swear words because I didn't want the reply to get taken down)

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Ah well Jack, some people are never happy unless they are making someone elses life suck. They have miserable souls. Sad sods! Imagine complaining about a puppy! What the hell....!!!

      Gardai? Are you Irish? Oh, please tell me you are! I Love the Irish!

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, the last few days my symptoms have been through the roof! After getting the pup I've only had about 10 hours sleep over 6 days!!! I think they've gotten worse because of the lack of sleep. It's mainly just head pressure and a slight headache, but it's really annoying. I might not be able to reply as I am flying to London tomorrow for a few days. Maybe I might get a bit of sleep! 

      Hopefully the symptoms will ease, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hello there dear smile

      I'm not surprised you have head pressure/headache. Sleep, a chance to renew our batteries, is vital. Take the opportunity, Jack, to relax and be kind to yourself over the next few days! And enjoy yourself!!!

      Hugs from Helen

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi, may be a stupid question, but I have had a bit of ear pressure this morning( it went after about 15mins) when I was last at the doc she checked my ears and said I'm ok to fly, but now I'm afraid I have an ear infection or something ( I have to be in airport in 3 hours so wouldn't get to my doc)

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi sweetiesmile If your doctor checked that you were okay to fly then try not to worry. She would not have sanctioned it had she suspected there was anything untoward in your ears. This is probably arose due to your AD, you know by know it can thrown up odd symptoms out of the blue. Don't let it frighten you honey. It came. It went. Ear infections are painful and don't just go away.

      Get on that plane, rest and enjoy yourself..And that's an order! Big hugs and keep in touch. Helen xxx

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, currently in London ( my ears didn't hurt at all,  actually the best flight I had , my ears didn't pop at all) I pushed my limits today, and did a slide down this massive tower in the Olympic Village. It was the best thing I could have ever done! Was really tired after the flight, even if though it was short....but got the tube into the city,which was great sheen though almost everywhere was closed. My symptoms are gone completely today ???? which is great! So can't complain

      Well, I better go, I'm heading out to dinner with my cousin

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Helen, so for as long as I've had my anxiety, I've been hiding it from people, well....trying. I didn't want to make people worry about me. But today I hair couldn't, I broke down and cried constantly for nearly an hour, I also started to hyperventilate and felt a weird tingling. This happened in the comfort of my own home ( luckily ). I finally told my mother who already knew about it, but didn't know how bad it was. I think I haven't told anyone about it because I don't like opening up to people, I suppose I have trust issues. I also found out that my mother's aunt died today, so she got that news and then me telling her about my anxiety. Now I feel terrible because I feel I have made her worse. And I promised my dad that I would look after her. Also being an only-child means that I'm usually the only one who sees how upset she is, however her sisters and my cousins have been great. II've been told by I don't know how many people (I've lost count) about how proud my dad would be. But I only told my mother a couple of weeks ago about what my dad asked me to do...

      So yeah....today's been honestly the worst one so far, hopefully tomorrow is better, I feel better after finally talking.

      Sorry for going on, Jack

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi there sweetie,

      Of course your Dad would be proud of you! You are a son worth being proud of, believe me. You have stamped down on your own grief to protect your Mum. You have had the most awful time, no wonder you are anxious. But you know, honey, hiding it made you worse. Can you see that? Holding all that inside of you? It's too much for anyone.

      Now let me tell you, you have not made your Mum feel worse. I promise you on that. I'm a Mum with sons, as you know. I would feel really, really bad if my sons kept health issues or emotional worries from me in the name of protecting me.

      Mum's don't want protecting. Mum's don't want to be left out where their children are concerned, no matter how old they are! . It's a Mum's job to protect her kids.

      My sons are older than you but they are still my "boys" My eldest son recently had an awful scarey health issue and I was aware of it right from the very start. Had I found out later that he had been keeping me in the dark, secretly frightened but not wanting to worry me, I'd have been devastated. I'd have felt I wasn't "there" for him when he needed me the most. I'd have felt I failed him.

      You promised your Dad you would look after your Mum and you are doing a magnificent job, Jack. But please don't shut her out of anything that worries or frightens you or if you feel ill. I want you to promise me on that. Yes, she needs you to be strong but she also just needs you to be her son, if you can understand that? She has lost your Dad as you have. But Jack, she still needs her boy, someone to "look " after otherwise she won't feel needed. So don't be too brave, don't be too strong. Let her feel that you do indeed need her.

      I know you have had an awful day but in a sense I am glad that you "let"

      go! I'm glad that  you let it out instead of allowing everything to fester inside of you. And as before you can always pm me because no matter what I always look forward to hearing from you!

      Everyone tells you your Dad would be proud of you. Now I'm telling you that I am proud of you.

      Lots of love, honey, lots and lots of love xxx

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Addendum, Jack. Now I can see why you had all those awful symptoms. Now it all makes sense to me and I hope it does to you. You've been keeping the lid on everything, hiding everything, trying to be the strong one. It was only a matter of time before the dam burst and you were able to confide in your Mum.

      God, I feel so sad for all you've been through. But this might well be the turning point for you, Jack smile

      Wish I could hug you bettercry

      xxx

      Report / Delete Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up