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I've posted here a bit about my problems with dealing with anxiety and depression. I feel i have a grip on both now (occasionally), but it has somehow morphed into fearing for other peoples health.
I live at home with my parents and we get a long really well, sometimes i guess i use them as an emotional crutch when i'm down or feeling agrophobic.
They are both in their mid 60's, in decent enough health (they can walk for 4km sometimes without any discomfort or breathing problems). I have just gotten over my initial anxiety about losing them eventually, it sometimes feels like i could lose them at any moment and when i'm not feeling ontop of things, this absolutely cripples me.
My mom is a heavy smoker and i seem to have latched onto this now as she coughs occasionally and it sounds quite muccusy (is that a word?!)
I have asked her to quit, cried infront of her about losing her and recently i helped her to buy a new e-cig to try and cut down on the smokes.
I guess my issue is, any small thing that disrupts their health or shows signs of aging, sends me straight into a panic attack or massive anxiety.
I don't know how to get out of ithis, i plan to start college next year and i can't concentrate on it at all with all my anxiety linked to their health.
I see younger families and i get really jealous and think "You're so lucky, you'll have your parents for years to come".
Am i being irrational? Should i take a step back and gain a bit more independence at the risk of making them feel unloved?
I'm at a loose end with this and it's really making life a living hell.
Any feedback or someone who has gone through the same with solutions would be hugely appreciated.
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