Brain Zaps/Shivers

One More Step Along The World I Go

One more step along the world I go

one more step along the world I go

from the old things to the new

keep me travelling along with you

Chorus:

And it's from the old I travel to the new

keep me travelling along with you

Round the corner of the world I turn

more and more about the world I learn

all the new things that I see

you'll be looking at along with me

Chorus

As I travel through the bad and good

keep me travelling the way I should

where I see no way to go

you'll be telling me the way, I know

Chorus

Give me courage when the world is rough

keep me loving though the world is tough

leap and sing in all I do

keep me travelling along with you

Chorus

You are older than the world can be

you are younger than the life in me

ever old and ever new

keep me travelling along with you

Chorus

Goodnight Ja and all xxxx

Melbi. You have had the courage to open your heart on here and still found it in yourself to support and find kind words and constructive help for others.

Courage, strength, call it what you will. It's there in you.

You feel cheated of seven weeks of your life because your doctor made assumptions about you and treated the symptoms without taking proper time to explore with you the real issues that were concerning you.

You can draw on that emotion to get the result that you want for yourself now and going forward.

There have to be happier times ahead for all of us.

Goodnight and sleep well.

Morning folks........What was that Melbi? Bzzzzzz, like my ears were about to explode, half of me enjoyed it, it was like.................hell, Im going to have a fit!! Oh well, go withit. No fits, just felt like i was playing music too loud. Bzzz. Honestly, not been playing with the bees or eating royal jelly, Bzz........(Oh, none of youguys will know whay Iam on about, cnat explain.........but good old Roald Dahl and Tales of the Unexpected would explain it. ) Bbzzzzzzzzz...............

:lol: Oh well, been up since 430am, and Im tired, but okay. Arms are a bit achey and my nerves in my tummy went loop de loop, but passing now. I reckon any minute Ill wantt to go to sleep.....just at the point when I am needed.

Huh, though Id just share my sleep deprivation with you folks. Theres no one else to talk to, bloody long night and long days and black eyes.

has anyone heard from breezman? Oh well, hope he get s this.....listen to Simmone White\"The Great Imperialist\".....you might like it, hope so. I do.

Must go , get 10 mins kip, Night night

Good morning to you all

Okay deep breathe - calm down!

I wasn't going to ring the doctors this morning for an appointment because she is there on Mondays.

Then I thought sod it! I'll ring anyway and ask to see someone else.

I've just come off the phone - the receptionist gave me several different options for times of appointments. I finally asked if I could have the 11:10 one and realised I'd forgotten to ask which doctor.

Shakily and hyper ventilating I asked which doctor it would be at that appointment. Blurting out straight after that I have no wish to see the female doctor. I haven't even got a clue how many female doctors work there!

Thankfully the receptionist appeared to pick up on my anxious question and told me the name of the doctor. Phew! It wasn't her but the receptionist then asked is that okay with me. Fine I tell her in a clamer voice. She double checked that I was okay with that doctor then said lovely - see you at 11:10.

I'm shaking like a leaf in a hurricane to say the least!

I think I will write everything down - knowing me I'll just tense up when I get there and mumble some crap to him and get into a right state.

Why do I feel so bloody anxious at the thought of seeing a doctor today?

Brain zaps............... well I've just shhok no I didn't I shook my head side to side and nothing!

Feeling somewhat subdued but that could be due to doubling up on the syndol last night! Oh! Weird or what? Certainly wasn't what so must have been weird!

About 2am this morning I was in the middle of a dream when someone lay on top of me (for some reason I was lay on my stomach - I didn't think I ever slept in that postion but there you go). Anyway, this someone - something lay on top of me and pinned me down - I could feel their hands as I struggled to escape (mine were under the duvet - theirs were on top) but I couldn't get a grip of this persons hands through my duvet. I tried to kick them but they had my legs pinned down too. The bloody bed was shaking as I tried to fight this someone off of me.

I opened my eyes to try and see who the hell it was but it was dark and I couldnt turn my head round far enough to see anyway.

Then they got off and disappeared - into thin air!

I sat up and looked around my room - nothing - nobody to be seen - door was closed - I never heard the door open or close before or after this attack on me.

Yeah! That's weird! Whoever tried to attack me was real - I might have been asleep when they first started - but it woke me up! I battled with this someone while awake!

Strange - they never made a sound not even when I struggled to get the words 'get off me' out of my mouth!

Who was this person and what the hell did they want? Why attack me? What have I done to them? And more to the point - where the hell did it come from?

Okay, off to get showered and ready for doctors.

Dreading it but it has to be done!

Melbi xxx

Melbi. Good on you. Good luck for this morning. You know what you want so go and get it !!

Tiny Tears. I know exactly what you're on about. It was an episode of \"Tales of the Unexpected\" from the late 1970's which starred Timothy West as a beekeper. I'm sure the episode was called Royal Jelly.

His baby daughter wouldn't feed so he gave her the Royal Jelly from his bees and she turned into a queen! :shock:

Hi all

I'm back! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

I only went and had a major anxiety attack while speaking to the doctor.

Golly! How embarrassing :oops: Bless him - he held my hand and passed my the tissues after!

He has prescribed zopiclone. He wouldn't give me a return to work note but instead asked to me see again on Wednesday and to book a double appointment so we can sit and chat.

He says he might think about me returning to work after we have chatted and I have had a couple of nights decent sleep.

Okay, you know what's coming next......

Have any of you had these tablets and if so do they work? I have to try 3.75 mg if that doesn't work then take 7.5mg

He said: 'How the hell can anyone cope with lack of sleep is beyond me'.

gave my hand a squeeze and said enjoy your sleep and see you on Wednesday.

Melbi xxx

yes Melbi, I had the higher dose. Hmm....well firstly they did not work, (In the beginning) but by night 3 I was fine, though I was told not to take them every night due to the addictive side effects. It is a hynotic, and it does work.......yeah...i want more.............hum!!!

Oh, I hope they help. Me gor bad chest pain now. I think I suffer from GAD, not anything else, sh*t....going dizzy spin spin, cats driving me mad he keeps trying to trip me up.

Hope the pills work and you dont get side effects. I slept on them....and believe me....even when I knock my head out I dont sleep :lol: Youd understand that if you saw the scar on my face. :oops: take care, glad it went better for you this time. Aside the panic attack.

Hi Melbi.

Yes I've taken Zopiclone and they work for me. I've only taken one at a time 3.75 mg. I've found they work best if I take time to relax first, maybe have a bath or a quiet sit down and take the pill about 20-30 minutes before you want to go to bed.

I've generally woken after 8-9 hours solid sleep and apart from a very dry mouth on waking I have had no other side effects and been OK (well as OK as I can be at the moment) the following day. :zzz: You certainly feel better for the sleep!!

I have found the effect is not cumulative so if take them for three/four nights in a row they seem to become less effective.

I've tried to restrict the amount of these i've taken (got though about one pack of 28 tablets since January) as they can be addictive but if you're taking them under your GP's guidance and supervision you should be OK. I'd give it a chance at 3.75mg first off.

It is only designed to treat short-term insomnia, not depression and some people have found it can increase anxiety, but that has not been my experience.

Fingers crossed!!

Best regards

Hi guys

Thanks for the feedback. He has given me 14 tablets (my I am honoured lol)

I will try the lower dose first.

He wants to see me again Wednesday after I've had a couple of good nights sleep to discuss long term treatment as when he asked if I would be prepared to try another anti depressant I declined.

He mentioned me doing thast questionnaire thing for depression but told him I did that the other week and scored 25 which the other doctor said was high and above average for showing signs of depression.

At least he did ask me if I felt depressed and asked if I would like some leaflets on it to which I burst out laughing and told him I could write a book on depression never mind a leaflet.

I also told him about my self medicating - he didn't comment but held my hand and said everyone needs their sleep and reassured me he would sort it!

He asked the usual have I had any thoughts of self harm - so I told him about my morbid thoughts and planning my own funeral but hadn't actually considered killing myself.

He said if I ever feel the need to talk or feel I'm going to harm myself to ring the surgery and ask to speak to him..... said he's always there even if it's just for a chat.

When I asked if I could go back to work he asked if I felt ready to go back - all I could do was shrug and say I didn't know but I do know I just want to get back to how I was before all this happened.

Yes - all in all I feel as though this time I have been listened to despite me getting into a right proper frenzy and ending up hyper ventilating and giving him front seat to one of my major anxiety attacks.

LOL at one point he said cry, just cry, you can cry, don't hold it in.

That did it for me and I breathed slower and deeper, straightened my back and pulled myself together.

Cry? I can't - no - I daren't cry - I don't think I'd ever stop - these tears are best locked away - I don't need to cry - I just need to sleep.

So - come Wednesday - what then? Long term treatment? What, I wonder, does he have in mind?

Am I really in such a mess he thinks I need long term treatment? Does he know how I'm really feeling? I thought I hid the majority of my feelings well - what did he see? What did I allow him to see? Have I opened up too mch to this doctor?

I'm looking forward to going to bed tonight and not feeling the guilt of self medicating to achieve sleep, finally I am going to take something on a doctors approval.

Will he make a note about my use of syndol and night nurse? No - I didn't mention the codiene - not that! That to me is like alcohol is to others - besides if I don't have codiene I'd use alcohol - codiene is better - you can go about your daily life taking that - you can't go getting a bottle of vodka out of your bag and taking a swig of it in public or at work LOLOL can you imagine! :shock:

Yes. It would seem I am far worse than I would ever admit to myself - never mind admit to anyone else. Some things are best kept deep inside - letting go means losing control - allowing the demons to take over - I'm done with the demons - this is my life and I will have control of it - not the damn demons.

A few nights sleep and I'll be as right as rain.

Melbi xxx

How are you managing this! I've tried to come off citalopram three times, and each time I have had such bad physical effects I literally feel like I'm dieing, vommiting, headaches, can't breathe, chest pains, can't move, light hurts my eyes. It's awful. Any tips on how to help?