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Can someone shed some light please?...

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HelpingFriend
HelpingFriend

Folks, I need your feedback please.  I love my husband and care deeply about him.  He was diagnosed with CP in 2011.  Back then, he had multiple stays in the hospital during the more severe attacks.  As expected, the hospital just gave him pain meds and fluids…and he would eventually feel good enough to go home.  As time went on, he decided to self-treat in order to save money.  So when an attack came, he’d suffer through it on our couch.  Although dangerous, this has actually been working for him.

 During his last hospital stay years ago, the internist in the ER said that along with cysts, he was approaching the stage that would require surgery…like the Whipple procedure.  So his pancreas is not is great shape.  He’s also dropped from 175 to 130 pounds, and can’t seem to gain any of that back.

He’s been taking ZenPep since August 2014 and it has stopped the daily vomiting.  He eats almost anything he wants – fats, meats, sugar, etc.  He smokes and is an alcoholic who has not stopped drinking.  This is where I need your input…he drinks daily, sometimes multiple drunks per day, but rarely has attacks.  I’m not complaining, but how can this be??

0 likes, 27 replies

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  • gavin99243
    gavin99243 HelpingFriend

    Posted

    Hi. I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. I'm not sure if you are aware but alcohol is one of the things that masks the pain of pancreatitis do that might be why you think he's not having attacks whilst drunk but he will be doing a lot more damage. I know when my partner was still drinking that the hospital pretty much refused to help once he stopped they finally operated.

    I hope this helps some. It's a vicious circle really.

    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend gavin99243

      Posted

      Thanks for your reply!  It makes perfect sense that the alcohol would mask the pain while he's drunk, but wouldn't he be in increasingly bad pain once he sobered up?  He doesn't appear to be in any pain...most of the time.

      I understand he's causing more damage.  I've tried to talk to him about it, but he doesn't want to hear it.

      I'm happy to hear that your partner has stopped drinking.  You're right, it is a vicious circle.  Alcohol is evil.

       

    • gavin99243
      gavin99243 HelpingFriend

      Posted

      We found that the pain only started once he had stopped drinking for prolonged periods so it would depend how long he is staying sober for.

      My partner left it too long to stop and now has severe diabetes, he has had half his pancreas removed but the other half has now died and he is suffering severe problems with liver, bowel and bladder. And is in pain constantly and has been on morphine for last 4 years at very high doses daily amongst over drugs. As others have said being on morphine is no way of life. He's now in hospital more then before.

      I really hope he stops drinking it's so important he does because the pain might be awful now but the after affects if the damage gets worse is just as bad if not worse.

      Does your husband want to stop drinking? It took for my boyfriend being taken into hospital and fed through a nasal tube for a month before he would stop.

    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend gavin99243

      Posted

      Wow - you've been through hell!  I thought it was bad here, but from what you just said, it's just beginning.

      He will SAY he wants to stop, but there's not a whole lot of effort behind it.  He keeps saying that he's going to stop smoking first...that's not happening either.  Typical of any addict, he's avoids the subject while he feels good.  He won't discuss getting help either.

       

    • gavin99243
      gavin99243 HelpingFriend

      Posted

      It took us finding the right doctor to scare my partner into quitting and the fact that he got so ill. Unfortunately as much as u nagged him, threatened to leave or cried they will only stop if and when they are ready and I learned this the hard way .

      Has he read through these forums to see what will happen? Please don't think that stopping will cause a massive attack strict away I think it's more the case of the pancreas is already dying and then they stop drinking so they are then able to feel the pain and focus on it instead of drowning it out. Either way the same damage has been done it's more a case now of how much damage he continues to inflict.my partner couldn't stop cold turkey we had to reduce the amount and then finally slowly stop.

      I really hope this all help you instead of frightening you

    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend gavin99243

      Posted

      I really appreciate you sharing.  It's nice to hear another partner's point of view because I don't have anyone locally that can relate.

      I know the nagging, etc. doesn't work - I realized that years ago.  To be honest, we're just roommates now - he lives his life and I live mine.  Because of this I've often thought that I should just leave, but I really do care about him and I know he needs me, so I haven't been able to do it.

      As far as him reading this forum...no, not even close.  If I had to guess, I'd say he's in denial.  His denial has put me in a position where the most I can do is educate myself and be prepared for what's to come....hence my questions on here.  sad

       

    • ivor79774
      ivor79774 HelpingFriend

      Posted

      Gosh you sound like a saint  I do hope your appreciated as some of us have to deal with all this alone which is no fun I can tell you, 
    • gavin99243
      gavin99243 HelpingFriend

      Posted

      I know exactly how you feel and it's soo hard to know what to do.

      Because my boyfriend is on so much medication now his illness is heightened as he has side affects from the meds. Seizures, hallucinations. Liver failure being but a few and is in n out of hospital every few weeks now. No one can tell you Ho to deal with it and it's horrid to watch someone go through it and not help themselves.

      That's what I found hardest when he drank as he was basically torturing himself and making me watch was how I viewed it and then you have the guilt of thinking you should stop them. I know now he would have stopped had he known what was coming.

      You should speak to his doctors and ask if he can be referred for cbt concealing to see if they can help with his drinking. I still don't know what's to come with my boyfriend all you can do is take each day as it is.

      Not many people will understand when u explicitly what is going on. It's not just the patient suffering. I do hope he stops soon for himself and for you and doest leave it too late x

    • GeorgiaS
      GeorgiaS ivor79774

      Posted

      I'm dealing with it alone Ivor now the government have cut my carers! As you say it's no fun; how on earth are we supposed to deal with daily tasks? My home is always in a mess, cooking etc is difficult but that's the thing I try to use my little energy on the most.
    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend ivor79774

      Posted

      Oh heavens no - I'm no saint, but I beleive in my vows.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm part of the problem though (being an enabler) and he'd be forced to deal with his situation if I left - that's been a huge question in my mind.  I'm not sure what I should do.
    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend GeorgiaS

      Posted

      From what I've seen, I can't imagine someone having to deal with it completely alone.  I'm so sorry if that's the situation you're in.  No matter what, keep your faith.
    • ivor79774
      ivor79774 GeorgiaS

      Posted

      I've even gone done to 8stone four which is really upsetting and can't stand to look at meself in the mirror most days then no appetite daily oh well it go,s on hey!
    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend gavin99243

      Posted

      Thanks Gavin - you're a sweetheart and your boyfriend is lucky to have you!  Hang in there...as will I.
    • gavin99243
      gavin99243 HelpingFriend

      Posted

      I'm gains girlfriend. Kind of hijacked his forum account to reply to you. But My names levi. If u ever need or want to talk again just message. It's nice to speak.to someone else in my position.
    • HelpingFriend
      HelpingFriend gavin99243

      Posted

      lol...oops!  Sorry for the confusion Levi.  I appreciate the offer to talk, the same goes to you,  Take care!!
    • GeorgiaS
      GeorgiaS HelpingFriend

      Posted

      Thanks for your understanding SadandLost; I will keep the faith! biggrin
    • GeorgiaS
      GeorgiaS ivor79774

      Posted

      That's rough, having no appetite! Can you eat porridge? It's so good for us, filling, you can add bananas and raisins, agave nectar. I add dried herbs like cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves for their health properties. And what about plain natural yoghurt, the kind with no added ingredients. That's easy to eat and good for us.

      Home made soup is easy to make once you know how and again, easy to eat.

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