Can't stop crying...feel like a burden and affecting my family

Posted , 8 users are following.

Does anyone feel numb as if a wet blanket over your brain? Or is this what depression feels like? I have never felt like this before in my life until reactivated EBV...it's spring..wanna clean, walk my dog, play with grandbabies, cook out on grill for my family, help my aging parents, get my hair done (scared of chemicals in color), put on makeup, enjoy a movie...this all seems so far out of reach..I have been going to my oldest daughter's often to be with her and grandbabies (we always were together a lot before I sick also) but the past few days I can tell im wearing on my daughter..I know me being sick has been so difficult on my entire family but now i need to leave my daughter alone for awhile as even my granddaughters are getting frustrated cause I can't play like they were used to (they all have been so sweet and supportive but no one expected I would be ill this long and things are changing now).. I've been crying all day uncontrollably..this has amplified my symtoms 10 fold and I'm angry with myself for doing this! Anyway, my days will now consist of being home and basically sitting and staring at all that needs done here...is it time to try an antidepressant?Does anyone have same experience? And anyone try antidepressant? This doesn't necessarily feel like depression but maybe it is? I wish i could come on here and be more positive! I've stayed off for a couple days as i knew I would be a downer like now..im thinking of you all and hoping you all are making improvements! Wishing you well..lecasco

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  • Posted

    Hi Lecasco,

    I had many days of feeling down, I was never depressed before. It did pass but if I get a virus I can feel it again.

    How long have you been sick?

    I have never been on an antidepressant, but there are others on here who have gone on medication, hopefully someone can respond with their experience.I hope you feel better soon. 

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    • Posted

      Thank you for response mono too..I've been ill since October but diagnosed with mono in december (I had mono when i was a teenager but i think i was only out of school for 2 weeks and just tired for awhile after that)...I may have to try some medication to see if it may help at all cause I'm in a dark place right now (I have Always been the one in my family that is there for everyone when they need help of any kind and now incapable of helping myself is a mind screwing ride I would love to get off of immediately 😢! I wonder if maybe a drug like adderal has ever been used to help combat mono (or ebv) fatigue? Just rambling again...I hope you are feeling better! It means so much to me that you responded..take care ?

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    • Posted

      I have been feeling better for about six months, that depressed and foggy feeling for me lasted from October 2016 to about September 2017, it was a long ride.
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    • Posted

      Hi Brent,

      I think you two are about the same time frame for illness also. I hope it changes soon for both of you, she seems to be catching every virus that comes along which doesn't make it any easier.

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    • Posted

      I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is struggling Mono and that you are struggling also Brent. Just wish this thing would cease in its tracks now, I know you guys have been through so much pain and heartbreak with this and just want you to know still thinking about you and rooting for you and believing truly in full recovery for you and your families.

      Take care and hang in there.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Hi Brent,

      im not in the same place as I was last year but I still suffer from the exhaustion, not really bad but it is still there sometimes.... Get really out of breath. It's nearly 18 months for me.

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    • Posted

      I am not in same place but I still feel like crap most of the time. It is starting to wear on me. My level of hope is starting to go down. I have started going to counseling just to try to help with coping with everything. I am 18-20 months diagnosised. I just want my old life back.
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    • Posted

      Hi Brent,

      You're doing things to help yourself I can tell, counselling can be something worthwhile for sure if it's the right person giving the right advice. I know how you feel man, it's been nearly a year with my back and being off work and I've been struggling at times to hold on to hope and confidence, we just need to keep trusting God and remembering He knows the bigger picture and knows why this is happening, even if we can't see it ourselves right now.

      Still rooting for you Brent, still believing you are going to get better and get back to a good way of life again - thinking about you and I still see wisdom in your messages and that you are a good person and I believe God will pull you through man - thinking about you and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Hi Brent,

      She also has body aches and feeling like she has flu. When did you first get sick? She got sick in November of 2017. Some things are better, I guess it just takes time but it sure is miserable.

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    • Posted

      It's so hard to live through that time Mono, I know how easy it is to say oh well things will with God's will be much better this time next year or whatever, but it's hard when you have to live through each day experiencing the symptoms, I really do get it Mono and having the same issues myself with coping with back pain at the moment. Still thinking about you and your family and rooting for you and believing in full recovery for all of you.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Hi Craig,

      Thank you as always for the support. I would rather go through it again myself than see my daughter go through it.

      I am sorry you are still having back trouble. I hope you are feeling better soon.

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    • Posted

      Thanks Mono, I'm always very grateful for your kind and supportive words too, it always lifts me and means a lot.

      It must be a very different and heartbreaking kind of pain to watch your daughter go through it, and for you to rather take that again than her to have it says so much about your character - your daughter will have age on her side and that is a plus, although I know that can be harder to see someone younger going through such a hard time. Really still believing and praying for your daughter's recovery - absolutely still believing better times are ahead for your family and blessings and peace and good health are on the way.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      I got really sick December 2016. I contracted the virus fall 2016. I have took several weeks off at a time during this time but I have to work to support my son.
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    • Posted

      It's amazing you've still been able to work on Brent, you've shown so much courage and I know you're weary - that message to hold on is for you today also man - things ARE going to improve in your life. I truly truly still believe that. Hang in there man.

      Craig

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