Pins and needles

Hey Jess

Well done you on your one week and one day :lol: dirty dirty habit hehehe

Having read your latest messages I am just in awe of u, and I read u have an essay to do and some studying too....guess u r keeping yourself busy then

Seriously I think you are a a star :magic: , I really do and hopefully others will see whilst this op works differently for different people, we are all, in one way or another, a very positive and supportive group.

Dont study too hard :-)

Russ x

you lot - u keep me going. trust me.

my study is proving 2 be agood distraction method from my pain. doing a degree in geosciences/physics.

Raindrop, i have got 2 take measures 2. goin the pretend kitchen 2morow 2 c if ok. thanks 4 ur reply and info. much appreciated. hope u keep well look after urself hun. xx

TFU, my height is 5ft 7 n a half. My second toe is 1cm longer than big toe - urgh. freeky. So far ur theory works, hahaha :lol: :lol: :lol:

Russ, this is the best kind of support i have found in this site/group. i certainly am not positive 2day though, having a bad day.

post soon.

Doped up Jessica

xxxxxxxxxxxx

At the age of 21 you do not think you'd ever be in pain with a prolapsed disc. I used to think people that moaned about their back pains and aches just over exaggerating and thought oh god another moaner about nothing. That was until god paid me back if you like! No one really understands and can really ever sympathise with the pain caused by this disc problem until you experience it yourself. I can’t do much and as a young sociable full time working girl I find this the most unbearable time. I have a good orthopaedic consultant fortunately and I’m hoping an operation may make a world of difference! I hope it will get better for me and everyone with this problem because I finally understand the moaning and it not just older people than me! I have become that person! Is there anyone else around my age group that also suffers with a prolapsed disc i wonder!?

Hi Sarah,

No I'm not your age I'm afraid. I wish I was unortunately I'm old enough to be your mother!!!! But like you, I never really understood what people with back problems go through and no amount of reading or listening to people was ever going to get me there. It was only when it happened to me that I learned. What I knew about prolapsed discs would have fitted onto the back of a postage stamp!!! But now, 14 months on, shall we just say that I am very much more educated and I have made it my business to learn.

I'm sorry that this has affected you at such a young age. But regardless of age, we are all in the same boat. What are the medics suggesting as the way forward for you???

Best wishes,

TFU

hello crew

Well i should have gone home yesterday-but tablets and reactions.

They started me on amatriptaline and upped dose of pregabalin. o I slept, and slept, and slept. Woke at 3pm.

Today better.

Chief of pain team came to c me. Right leg is disabled for life. Chronic pain team 2 c me wen Im discharged. He talked a lot about alternative treatments. May or may not work. But Its just now hit me that Im unable to walk properly and Im going to suffer this pain always.

everyone is just doing their normal stuff. Nurses workking hard and this lot in my bay whinging. Im feeling really upset and dont know who to talk to. I have ALWAYS been sporty and walk everywhere. (i cant drive).

Now i cant. The pain is horrendous!! How do you cope daily with that?

I dont want 2 spend my life moaning and crying with this awful pain.

i cant sit on a loo seat, a hard surface, lift the leg up, walk right, bend down, etc. I know I sound selfish and should be grateful I wasnt paralysed permenantly, I am grateful! I just wanted to run around the park with my kids and that, u know?

Should be home 2morow anyway. Cant wait.

Jess

Hi Jess,

It's such early days yet sweetie. Remember when you had the first two ops, I bet you couldn't do much bending/swatting/sitting stuff then either? I know I couldn't. But that gets better once the body starts to heal up. And your body has been through so much in the last few months. It is going to take a while for the internal tissues to heal. I have a new MRI scan next Monday and I was told that even though it will be 10 weeks post my second op, there will still be a lot of blood and swelling inside making it difficult see what is going on.

At least the pain team are planning on looking after you after discharge, but it will probably trial and error and if we've learned anything it's that the symptoms are a moving target, right??

You'll get back to the park. And you'll sit in the sunshine with your son playing around your feet. And you'll do what you can, as you can. And I guarantee you'll feel a whole heap better once you get out of hospital and back home.

Baby steps my friend, baby steps.

I am just so glad you are on the mend.

TFU

Hi Jess,

Poor you I feel for you, you sound really down and there's no wonder! As Tfu said, it is early days yet don't give up you'll get back to running around the park with your kids. You've had a lot done to your back over the last few weeks so things are bound to be numb and feel odd for quite a while till things settle back down.

Have the Pain Team suggested taking any other medication to help with your pain? What about Morphine Patches (10mg) they certainly helped with my pain. I was told that Acupuncture's supposed to be good too.

When I first came out of hospital (3.1.08) I couldn't sit down on a hard surface, especially the loo seat, but it's gone off now it will all take along time to heal.

I know your pain is unbearable now but believe me it will get easier I've been there, I never thought I'd be pain free again, every day I would be sat unable to do anything thinking is this how life's going to be from now on. You won't spend your life moaning it just seems like that now.

You can always moan to us lot as we know exactly where you're coming from. It does help to get things off your chest!

Take care and keep posting.

Angela

Hi all,

For some reason the thought of going for another MRI on Monday is really starting to get to me. I don't know why. It will be my 5th in 10 months. I think that it is just that it brings back memories of all the other stuff.....3 emergency visits to A&E, 5 visits to the Consultant, 3 hospital admissions, 2 operations (microdiscectomy and discectomy), dural tear, CSF leak, pseudomeningocele, suspected Bacterial Meningitis with blackouts and fit/seizure, losing all desire to go to the loo since the first op (whatever that means) and best of all being carted off to a mental hospital last May by the police because of the pain/effects of Tramadol.

I suffer from complex post traumatic stress disorder anyway. I really don't need all this stuff banging around in my head. I am just so damn tired. If I could just get a decent night of sleep it would be a start, particularly as I am back at work full time. I really didn't expect to be in such a bad way when I stopped taking the meds for 24 hours. It is nearly 10 weeks since the second op, surely I shouldn't still need as much medication as I was on pre op??? That is - pre any op!!! And I really can't bear the thought of having to be admitted again. I'm almost tempted not to go for the MRI on Monday. At least then I won't have to find out what is wrong. And best still I won't have to do anything about it. I know the Consultant is concerned. Why couldn't she have just said that everything was progressing normally when I saw her two weeks ago?? Why are we now talking about a new possible prolapse/symptoms of a problem at L1/L2 (she has already taken L5/S1 and L4/L5, how much more does she want???)/the dural tear possibly having re-opened/a nerve ending trapped in the dural tear/possible unrepairable neurological damage.

I am just so totally exhausted and it just bangs round and round my head. I don't think I could handle another op, not after everything else that has happened over the last year. It is just all there, like a ghost that won't leave me.

I would like nothing more than to just walk away. But by going for the MRI on Monday, I am choosing to walk back towards it. Does that make sense????

I am truly fed up today. And truly exhausted. And if I'm honest, truly scared!!! I guess it is decision time!!!

TFU

Hiya Jess,

I can only echo what Truly has said...she's a wise bird (sorry Trules but you are :D ). You have been through a lot, not only physically, but emotionally too. Your body will need time to recover, but you also need time to adjust to your new set of circumstances.

I'm sure, in time, when your body is over the gruelling surgery you will have a bit more energy to psychologically deal with what's going on (the pain management team often have access to health psychologists who may be useful if you need to talk to someone about it).

When I was in horrendous pain and unable to do a lot of things prior to the op, the only way I could keep going was to focus on the things I could do....some days it was even focusing on the fact that I was able to wash my face without help.....I know your situation is different, but using this strategy may help...I hope it does..

It's really good that you can use your laptop, so you can still have contact with us and other people/information etc.

Spring is coming so maybe soon you will be able to spend time in the fresh air, this will be good for you and the kids. And even if you're not running around, you'll find other ways of playing with them and having fun...it may be worth going onto the netmums website and having a look on there..

I guess it's a case of adjustment, and whilst that may mean saying \"bye bye for now\" to some activities, it could also mean a big \"hello\" to lots of others.

Take care of you Jess, I'm thinking of you and sending big gentle hugs.

Love,

Jules xx :D :D

[quote:4b1cb8ab83=\"daisymoo\"]hi darren, i have pm'd you sweet, k, :D

:rose:mandy :rose:[/quote:4b1cb8ab83]

No point PM'ing me as I need a coffee LOL xxx

Hi Truly,

I just wanted to say \"Good Luck\" for the MRI on Monday :magic: . I think that after what you've been through, it's perfectly understandable to be feeling anxious, as the MRI has an outcome, which if not good could potentially mean further surgery. I think the fact that you are back at work is amazing!! And probably a good thing as it can be a distraction from all the other stuff. Maybe your taking the decision to have the MRI because it's the right one and you know your back isn't as it should be and needs sorting?

I know it's easy for me to say but thinking about what may be going on in your back is probably fuelling your anxiety and in turn stopping you from sleeping. When you have the results, then you can look at what the options are in terms of treatment/management.

Are there any techniques you could use in order to relax, and take your mind off things? Also, with the pain meds,it may be worth reducing them first of all rather than going cold turkey? What are you taking at the moment?

I'll be thinking of you Monday and let us know how you get on....

Take care,

Jules xx :D :D

i used to write on this site all the timje when i was absent from work following a l5 disc prolapse, Just wanted to catch up and let u all know the latest on me and find out how daisy moo and gail are? I have quite a happy ending so would love to share my expeirences with all who`s interested. Kelly xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Kelly,

I joined the site inOctober 07 just prior to undergoing an L5/S1 discectomy..open plan. Things are going well for me too but would love to hear how you are progressing :D

Take care,

Jules xx :D :D

Hi Jess keep your chin up i can only echo what everone else has said but we're all here for you shout and scream at us if it helps get it out your system an then stop and think about all the positives your still here yes you've got restrictions some will improve and you will learn what you can and can't do and the things you can't do you will replace with other things that you may have never thought about before, its still early days take them one at a time note down your improvement each day if you get a day when there isn't an improvement look back at the days when there was and i bet you will have more the day after sorry if i'm waffeling but take care i'm thinking of you xxxx Julie

HI JESS

i feel for you i really do as do a lot of peps on the site, being in hospital doesnt help with your emotional feelings, you,ll be home soon and focusing on things you can do, which will be a little more every day, at the moment you are post op and your body hasnt had time to adjust and heal to that intrustion , the surgery alone takes many weeks for the body to heal and with it will come less pain and the time for you to adjust, we,r all in such a hurry to get well that we do tend to forget this type of injury takes far longer to recover than a lot of illnesses (think thats me giving myself a lecture! lol) im sure when your home in familier surrondings that things wont seem as bad, yes you have new circumstances to over come but nobody expects you to adapt over night these things wil come slowly, i wish you well and hope in a few weeks you,ll be posting on the site saying all the things your able to achieve, but i,ll echo everyone elses phrase BABY STEPS, good luck jess. gail :cuddle: