copd can anyone give advice

​I'm hoping my comments won't upset too many but, as a male, I'd like to suggest an alternative route to help you both.

​We men pretend to be big strong guys but, behind the veneer we are actually frightened little boys who want to run to Mum for some assurance that everything will be okay!

​So, when we think we might be seriously ill we panic, we get scared and suddenly all logic leaves the room. The whole concept of doctors becomes a negative situation so we do everything possible to avoid them.

So how we you break the negative cycle? Well, to begin with you have to remember that while we are feeling really negative about the doctor you keep telling us that we must stop smoking – just another bit of negativity!

We actually want someone to bring some positivity into the cycle so how can we do that?

My suggestion is, for now, forget his smoking habit which will stop the negativity of constantly telling him something negative then, using information from this site, start telling him about the positive experiences of others here: how the doctor gives medications that make life/living better, how pulmonary rehabilitation has helped so many by understanding their condition … if he gets to PR then he will be surrounded by others who have either stopped smoking or are wanting to (that might just be the positive encouragement he needs to actually stop himself).

Once he’s diagnosed, receiving treatment and has a few positive moments in life then, in my humble opinion, it will be time to tackle the difficult issue of smoking but, until then, any attempt to stop him will have the opposite effect.

I know this puts yet more pressure on you (in your difficult situation to have to search for positives when life must feel very negative right now) but hopefully it might in a couple of weeks start to show some signs of improving the situation.

Sorry I ramble on so long but I just thought I’d try and give some suggestions from the male perspective and another approach to the problem.

Whatever happens and whatever he & you decide to do I wish you both all the best.

I keep a fairly regular check on all forum COPD topics. I find many of them quite moving, striking a sensitive chord during my own attempts to find a solution or two. (I think I have already made it clear that I have only myself to blame after 50+ years of moderate/constant cigarette smoking.)

My first step was to abruptly cease the habit. The only thing I miss about it is the perceived enjoyment. Otherwise I have not regretted it, nor have I had any craving to light another cigarette. So there is something to be said about having a strong mental attitude. I have recently written on "Can it be reversed?" The consensus seems to be a definite "no". I am not so sure.

One new area I am experimenting with is vitamin A complement. By that I do not mean overloading the liver with supplements, causing further damage. Although already a fairly heavy consumer of two listed vegetables I shall be filling up on a carotenoid-rich diet of carrots, cantaloupes, sweet potatoes and spinach. It is noted that a derivative of vitamin A called all-trans-retinoic acid injected into adult rats regenerated their alveoli. The alveoli sacs' damage are, of course, at the very root of our problems. I certainly will be increasing consumption of the produce, although cantaloupes/sweetmelon are hard to find at the moment.

I am not suggesting for a moment that eating four disparate items on their own is going to solve our problems. However, by adding them to your husband's diet without saying a word, may start a healing process. 

Unfortunately, a single step on its own is not enough: we all have to stop smoking, get all the exercise we can, and get help together with medication. 

Sorry to hear about your problems. It sounds that your husband is not going to take any advice at the present moment in time and you may have to wait until he is admitted to hopsital for a thorough medical and advice. I somoked until 12 years ago and gave up when my first wife died 12 years ago but still got COPD two years ago.

Ask your GP if he would visit or asign a nurse to visit..

I hope the mood swings are not gicen to physical hurt or emotioanal towards you. if you feel endangered ther are other support groups. 

I have to go out now but will read your letter again and continue.

Hi Christina,I myself has c o p d,I'm female age 54 i to am a smoker,I know exactly how you feel &I know how your husband feels,

i struggled to with awful breathlessness for such a long time,I myself struggled to go upstairs,I couldn't go to the loo or have a shower that I felt tired & breathless,

I had used the same Medes for yrs &a I got so ammuned to them that they didn't have the same effect,so I went to my doctor,he prescribed different meds,to which some had no effect or that they made me worse,so my doctor said I have to try what other meds their is available as there will be ones that work for me,

very true my doctor was,he also gave me a nebuliser,which I use once a day usually 1st thing in the morning,but I believe it can be used up to 4 times a day,with the new meds I had never felt better,I could walk upstairs,shower,do the garden etc,

so maybe your husband needs to get updated Meds if he hasn't already,

having copd wears you &a your partner down,I know I'm living it,it's a horrible illness to have,

also I would like to say as you had mentioned that your pay is the only pay coming in to the house,has your husband not tried to get disability benefit,having copd is classed as a higher rate disability,also if your husband needs help getting around,needing help with showering,needing a hand to dress,anything that you need to help your husband with puts him in good stance also for an additional disability benefit such as the middle rate & lower rate,you may well be eligible for all 3 rates,

its worth applying for Christina @

& if you for I hope you & your husband are sucsseful in applying.

i wish you all the best &a good luck

regards Sheila.