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Coping alone after hip replacement

Posted , 29 users are following.

sueW4
sueW4

I'm due to have my hip replaced in three weeks. The friend (now a former friend) who was going to move in and help has let me down and everybody else I know is either on holiday or working. Is it realistic to expect to cope alone? I am a single mother with two teenage children. I'm 51 and very fit. I was feeling really positive about the surgery but now I'm dreading it and wondering whether I should postpone it. Any advice on what to expect in the beginning and how bad it's likely to be?

3 likes, 70 replies

70 Replies

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  • jeanwales
    jeanwales sueW4

    Posted

    ps, As I am a week or so before you I will try and post here each day when I get home  as it may help when it is your turn.
  • Nordic
    Nordic sueW4

    Posted

    Hi, I think you will need a lot of help - I certainly did after my op.  My partner had to get me dressed before he went to work, make a cuppa, breakfast, leave lunch where I could reach it.  Because of sticks, you can't carry anything, for instance from the kitchen to the sitting room.  He had to wash me - I couldn't get into my shower which was over my bath.

    I was also very depressed - having been very fit & active, working full time.  I felt like an old woman, & demoralised having my (newish) man wash me, put my underwear on me etc.  I've always been very independent, & the whole thing shook me.

    Don't be afraid to ask friends/relations for help - this is going to be tough.  Sorry.

    • sueW4
      sueW4 Nordic

      Posted

      Thanks! Yes, I can imagine all of those things.. the washing is going to be a nightmare and I am a bit down at the prospect of feeling down (!! - lots of negatives) as my ex is the 'friend' who was supposed to look after me and has now wimped out. I know this is weird question but can you do things like stand on one leg/crutch to make a cup of tea? It's strange, practical things like that that are bugging me. I hope you're feeling better now, by the way! Sue 
    • Jayive
      Jayive sueW4

      Posted

      Hi, when I was about to go into hospital I was given a raised toilet seat a perching chair for the kitchen, a walker type of seat roller thing, a walking frame and various small things, grab stick, long handled sponge, sock puller on, leg raiser to lift my leg onto the bed and an OT came to discuss my needs and showed me how to use them.

      All this was NHS so I guess you can ask for them if you need them, I also bought myself a trolly which enabled me to carry things, plates, cups, washing etc around the house, I still use this now as I find it so easy to cope with things. Hope this helps, good luck

  • Nordic
    Nordic sueW4

    Posted

    Hi Sue, you'll be able to balance to  put the kettle on - but you won't then be able to carry the cup of tea! Ideally get a kettle etc positioned near where you are going to be sitting.  I  don't want to sound too negative, but all sorts of things that you take for granted now will suddenly be impossible.  And don't get me started on elastic stockings....sleeping on your back for 6 weeks....!
    • sueW4
      sueW4 Nordic

      Posted

      Ugh - horrible thought. I practiced sleeping on my back last night and it was a failure. I'm hoping - and you're going to laugh now - to be able to work my juicer as I'm obsessed with juicing at the moment but I think I'll have to get the kids to cut up the veggies and make the juice for the day before they leave for school - poor things!
    • marey
      marey sueW4

      Posted

      good plan...and don't be apologetic to them...think that you're giving them a great opportunity to take charge...and let them know you have every confidence in them....OK!? 
    • marey
      marey sueW4

      Posted

      brilliant idea to keep up the juicing...especially veg so you won't have bowel probs... as well as the juicer can you set up filtered water beside you?
    • eileen64__UK
      eileen64__UK Nordic

      Posted

      Hi Nordic

      I got a trolly from the OT when I had both my THR's which meant I could hobble with sticks/crutches over to the trolly and prop the crutches up and off I went with it. Into the kitchen. Sue if you are feeling wobbly stick one crutch on it going in. and use the crutch when making the tea. pop it on the trolly and off you go back to your chair.

      I wasnt on my own but my husband was working full time. If you are not offered a trolly ask for one. They can onlysay no  LOL

      Love

      Eileen

    • RossshireBuffUK
      RossshireBuffUK Nordic

      Posted

      Hi to Nordic, & everyone else following this thread.  I was sent to a community hospital 5 days after my THR; & stayed there another 4 1/2 days before going home (it probably would have been a day or two less, but the W/E intervened).  I'm writing regarding carrying things.  The occupational physio was going to provide me with an excellent small wheeled trolley to enable me to carry food plates, cups of coffee, vodka martinis, etc., from the kitchen to my telly chair ~ when I discovered that I could negotiate the 10 feet or so walking with only a stick in my hand on my 'good' side, thus leaving my other hand free to carry the essential brandy & soda!razz  I don't know if this was just me; but I suggest you try and see if you can carry a mug (empty for the trial!) from your kettle to your chair.
    • eileen64__UK
      eileen64__UK RossshireBuffUK

      Posted

      Hi

      I'm glad I'm not the only one who knows about the trolly  LOL

      Thats good going.....one stick and balancing things in the other hand

      Love

      Hileena

  • Nordic
    Nordic sueW4

    Posted

    Yes, ask for as much equipment as you can!  I wasn't offered a trolley, so all this advice is good.  If you've got 2 sticks though, you won't be able to carry anything.
    • eileen64__UK
      eileen64__UK Nordic

      Posted

      Thats the point.....you put your sticks down and get things you want to move on to the trolly and push the trolly. The trolly is as good for short distances as sticks or you can put the sticks {or one of them} on the trolly if you think you will need it when you get where you are going LOL

      Love

      Eileen

  • terri17835
    terri17835 sueW4

    Posted

    You will be fine. I am 51 and active. I had my hip replaced almost nine weeks ago. My 19 yr. old daughter helped me some. After the first few days I really didn't need any help. I used crutches but only one after a couple of days. I used the raised toilet seat and got the grabber and thats all. I was able to shower on my own and get dressed. I wore comfortable dresses that go on over the head the first week. I got tired quickly between tasks so would sit every little while those first couple of weeks.But it gets better daily. I drove after 3 weeks.I only wore the stockings the first few days and didn't have injections. I did have physical therapy at my house twice and they gave me new exercises to do since I had mastered all the ones I was originally given. I am now walking 4 miles most days. Don't postpone your surgery. Being fit will make all the difference. You will do great!
    • Nordic
      Nordic terri17835

      Posted

      I am amazed you only wore stockings for a few days - I was told I HAD to wear them for 6 weeks, & followed advice to the letter. Also was told not to drive for 6 weeks. I certainly couldn't have showered on my own, I couldn't balance & was very fearful of slipping.
    • terri17835
      terri17835 Nordic

      Posted

      I was suppose to wear stocking longer but it was too hot and my doctor said it was okay since I had no issues with blood clots and was moving around alot. I was told I could drive when I felt up to it.I never had any issues with balance. I also didn't go home on any painkillers. Maybe that had something to do with the balance issues? 
    • eileen64__UK
      eileen64__UK Nordic

      Posted

      Hi Nordic

      I agree with you. I was told 6 weeks and not one day less, I was moving about and I also had injections to do every day for some time {in my stomach} to stop clotting but still had to wear the passion killers LOLcheesygrin

      I wasnt allowed to drive before 6 weeks either....actually it was 8 because my first THR at 6 weeks the weather was horrendous and I hadnt the confidenc to drive at first

      Love

      Eileen

       

    • sueW4
      sueW4 eileen64__UK

      Posted

      I think the driving is a matter of when your insurance covers you and I'm pretty sure mine is six weeks or clearance from the surgeon. Will just have to see how it goes, The shower is a concern but I'll just have to get the kids to hose me down in the garden or something!
    • marey
      marey sueW4

      Posted

      love that idea...hose down in the garden!

      i found the details of that book if it should interest you ...its called "Hold on to your kids" by Gordon Neufeld ph.D  and Gabor Mate  MD.

      I am finding it to be really meaningful and supportive of the instinct to keep our kids close and away from negative inflences. I'd be very interested to hear what you think of it. Guesssing you have time to read? 

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