Posted , 12 users are following.
So today is going to be the challenge day for me. Saturday is the night I always binge drink at home. It wil be the first Saturday night in many years besides been pregnant or too ill or away at the inlaws that I haven't drank. I also binge on a Sunday as the craving to do it again is strong. I don't work Mondays so that hasn't helped the situation.
I have been feeling positive about it all week that I can do it & trying to look forward to spending the time with my husband after we put our son t bed watch a film order food & remember it all the next day. I always fall asleep as I am wasted & can't remember what the food tasted like or how the film ended. I wake on the couch in the early morning & make my way to bed. Last week I thoought I could try drink a little less but I tried to get as much down me before my husband came downstairs so I would feel I had enough to get intoxicated.
I have to not drink tonight. There is no vodka in the house so I would have to actually go buy it. I have to stay strong & see what it feels like to have a sober Saturday. Yesterday set me back when my friends came to visit I just felt so anxious. I think I just need a quiet life with my family for the next few weeks maybe a month to get to a better state of mind with this.
This forum has helped me so much. I really feel I would not have even gotten to this stage without the support from you lovely people. You understand & pass no judgement. When I feel panickiy I can come on here & vent. Thank you!! I'm hoping in the future I can be more supportive to others too.
Big hugs xxx
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