Diazepam

All the very best mate 

Nicola  

I think you have a very strong contitution to do what you are doing.  Good on you but I no the hell you are in, I'm not a doc only going off what i've been thru, as I've said before I wanted off so bad I came off was on nothing for 9 months and my life was still a living hell, prob a little better than at the begining.  All docs were saying it should all be out of your system by now you should feel fine.  I was so sick of hearing that, I new my body and yes it may have been out of my system, that's the point your body and brain has to learn how to live without it in your body and re adjusting the pathways in your brain, getting your body to work again and I hate to say it but it can take years even after your completly off.  I think my longest was around the 12 months again doing everything I could to try to help feeling that way, everyone told me you have to ride it out and it would be the hardest thing you will ever do.  I did have one girlfriend, she came down slowly and her doctors gave her other meds to really help with withdrawals, she went along time around 2-3 years.  Funny thing is when I saw her again she was so happy to tell me she was off them and I was so happy for her, she said Life is so much better now, I said i'm so poud of you.  She asked how i was and i told her I just could not go on and on that way, I wanted to die and felt ashamed telling this to someone that achieved what I wanted to achieve.  In the next breath she said to me, and I quote "you don't have any on you do you", of course i said no.  I've had a few run in with people like that from the detox clinic, don't no if they have actualy come off if they are asking me for them.

I've gone off track,  just stay on th amount you are on for as long as you need.  That out of body, sweating tingling buzzing, no sleep feeling should get a little better, even though 23mg sounds like a lot I don't find Valum that strong, so from 40 o 23 is a pretty big drop.

I as you know went back on them, could not live like that, wasn't living but we are all different in make up, you may get better quicker and try to believe in that, I no it's hard to but you seem very determined.  Your at that stage where its like, just STOP ALL THIS and LET ME SLEEP FOR A WEEK, I no honey and i'm so feeling for you.  I'm not on large amounts so I'm not feeling wonderful but I can get thru the day without that constant clock watching etc.  Computer is playing up but i get on as much as i can.   Have you tried any over the counter meds, like phenergan, sedative they are a antihistimine also you can take 3 at night, i took 4 once when i was like you and i slept well.  Esp if your still having some valium, or mersyndol, its basically paracetamol Doxiciliyan {calmative} and a small dose of codine.  In Australia we can also get Restavit which is just the Doxicilyan (don't no if thats spelt right} but a higher dose, a sleeping tablet, they are all over the counter and only use for some reliefe here and there & Austalia is pretty strict with what you ccan get over the counter.  Tell the Chemist you just can't sleep he will explain all and non addictive.  You prob dont want to take any pills but your body needs rest my dear or you will go of your rocker.  Otherwise go back to doc and ask if there is something that can help with what your going thru, I read about someting the other day thats suppose to help big time, then my computer crashed.  Ill try find it again and let you know.  You are doing the best you can, im thinking of you.  let me know how your going in a cpl days OK.  Ill try some more research for you and me, as I dont want to be on them for the rest of my life, ill PM you soon also.  Take care as much as you can my sweet.  Chin up.   Nicola xxxx

Just wondering how you are and how things are going for you.   I hope you are maintaining the drop in the diaz. and have not been driven to up the dose  - as tempting as it may be.

I am off 9 months now,  still having waves of bad times,  muscle pains and cramps have not stopped at all yet,  BUT   I do feel better in the in-between times.  My skin is better, not so dry as it has been all these many years,    life is good, sharper, brighter,  louder -  more moreish in every way.  I remind myself of this constantly when the withdrawal washes over me big time again,  one day it will end,  it will all have been worth it.    One day Drs will learn how to treat patients coming off Diaz. and help them get through the nightmare.

Over 30 yrs I took diaz.  more than half my life,  I have changed in so many way as I have come off,  it has been one heck of journey and one I would not wish on anyone,  shell,  you will get off this drug,  you will feel better,  know this and continue SLOWLY  -  don't ever get impatient to have done with it and be off them once and for all.  It will all be worth while,

Very Best Wishes, you are in my thoughts

Regards

Jessie.

Do you get a dry mouth?  If so Try to avoid mouthwashes with Alchohol in them, they know out all your  good bacteria.  there is a product called Biodene and its for dry mouth and that odour, it helps restore saliva in the mouth which is our natural bacteria against. decay. gingavitus, bad breath etc.  A lot of the mouthwashes today are actually flled with sugar also, I know arse about face.  My dentist told me your better off brushing with a mix of bicarb of soda and water and even rinsing with warm salty water.  Your doing so well, I'm so proud it gives me hope that one day I can get off completly.  I no it's stil not easy but your over the half way mark.  GOOD ON YOU.  Best wishes Nicola.  P.S laptop completly died, sending it in to warrantly people which want to examine everything before they ok the warrantly AHGGGG. 

So frustrating.  Paid a bit for that extended waranty and only a year old.  Windows, it all happened after windows updates installed.  Wont go on bout that but that's why im not on computer much latley, im at the library for a litle while today,   Hopefully I'll be back on soon, no guarantee.  TAKE CARE. 

regards shell

so sorry you had the flu to deal with as well,   the itchy head,  yes I do have that,  it is getting less so than it was.  It is the cold sweats that start on my head that I find the worst,  almost as tho being pricked with an icicle!

I did not have bad breath,  or at least not that I knew of or tasted in any way,  but for a time there was a strange metallic taste in my mouth and what ever I ate or drank.  This did not last for too long,  I took to eating butter mints lol.

Well done for not increasing the dose while you were feeling so down,  big big hug for you girl.

Your period problem,  have you mentioned this to your Dr?  It could be totally seperate from the withdrawal,  I can't say for myself as I stopped them so many years ago.   Do you have a 'Well Woman Clinic'  at your practice?  Be worth having a check up,  also you don't want to be getting anaemic,   can't spell that lol 

It is really good that your Dr is supporting you and encouraging you to go slow with the reduction,   go as slow as you can shell, you will still get there.

A good thing about all this for me is the weight loss,  along with the other positives,  I have lost two stone,  a new wardrobe was needed,  my taste in clothes has changed as well,  for the better lol.

I keep thinking about you shell,   every time I feel really good I wonder how is shell doing,  hope she sticks it out,    it is sooooo worth it.  I am still getting waves of withdrawal but not so bad this last month.  My Dr told me a year,  and I guess it that could be right,  nine and half months now  and getting better.

Take care shell,  and keep letting us know how you are getting on.  Be good to yourself.

Jessie,  with a big hug x

I started a post a while back about being off the Diaz.    Had a reply from a woman  ' linda83143 '    she has come off and has been telling me how great life is,    my word  she has passed lots of exams  and  is soooooo  full  of life           she is very encouraging  about getting off them.

Hope you are doing OK,    stick with it shell,    you will  get through this    (  so will I  )       I hope the flu  has  left you by now  and  you can put that one behind  you.

Warmest regards

Jessie. 

Have not heard of Pregablin, pain relief.   Valium is more for anxiety and yes even muscle spasams.  Dont no how long you you have been on them or how much you take and while you are on them stable you wont think they are bad, if the day comes you have to come off them then you will know what we are all talking about Withdrawals from hell, worse than Herion etc and for so much longer.  Everyone is different, you may be a  person that can handle it but overall %98 of people that have to come of or even taper down pretty well lose there life.

You said you  have to have one to go out?  if that is the case you are well and truly DEPENDANT.  so when your body starts not getting the stuff, your body, brain even soul has to re adjust.  They really change the chemicle make up in the brain, those delicate pathways can take years to get back to notmal.  Just my exp and many people i talk too also.   It's a drug that when you can stop you dont want too and when you want to stop you cant.  Let me know a little more about how long and how much etc your on, iv'e been through two detoxes and they almost killed me.  litteraly in hospital with seziures and delirium and that was not the worst of it.   It stays in your system for a good 48-72 hours so sometimes withdrawals wont hit hard untill your over that time period.  I wish you all the best and look up any info you can on Benzodiasapines..  Hope to hear from  you again  Stay safe.  Nicola