Doctors don't care.

Posted , 11 users are following.

Menopause has not got the attention it deserves by the medical community. Every year thousands of woman go thru excruciating menopause related problems for which medical science has no answers and worse they are not even looking for answers. Every doc that i have been too and said my libido is gone has given me the same advice. Try to spice up your sex life, go on a holiday with your partner, do meditation to reduce stress, use a vaginal gel for lubrication etc etc. I get soooo mad. There is nothing wrong with all that, i'm not stressed and holiday is not helping. We were having sex thrice a week just six months before my menopause started. The fact is now there is NO sexual feelings or any response from the body. Breasts are not feeling anything and orgasm takes sooooo long to happen that i lose all erotic feelings by then. It's a PHYSICAL problem but the doctors act like it's a mental problem, all in your mind etc. What idiots. I forced my doc to give me HRT but it's only estrogen and progesterone. What we need is testosterone i think. Anyone with a similar experience?

4 likes, 57 replies

57 Replies

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  • Posted

    I also just thought of a great ad campaign, "Are you suffering from insomnia, extreme sudden weight gain, fatigue, depression, bone loss, etc. well, then you're just a woman over 40 and doctors could care less." And then more after of course. But way to grab them in intro.

    • Posted

      Like it!! Don't forget to add brain fog, debilitating aches and pains, confusion, painful sex, headaches, forgetfulness... oh i could go on and on (and frequently do!!)

      xx

  • Posted

    This is all very interesting. It makes me suspect that Suki_girl is perhaps truly a research scientist who maybe thought they could suggest helpful products (which is appreciated) but also a man who maybe is just on the forums for research? And being a man didn't understand why we were all making such a big deal about lady issues. A woman would never joke about another woman acting too "hormonal" or emotional because her emotions are in an "upheaval". Women know that is an old joke that in reality is very demeaning and fuels a lot of female stereotypes that negatively impact women in all areas of their lives, work (salary, promotions etc.), home (relationships) etc. Similar but obviously not exactly the same, as a racist joke. Though I guess there are those women that would rather not support other women. But still this sort of expression seems really odd for me in a woman.

    • Posted

      Nope, just a woman who doesn't take life, or herself, too seriously and who has chosen to be mindful of everything good in her life rather than getting angry about things i can't change. Perhaps it is an American thing. Here in the UK we cope by having a good joke and laugh about it - hence my 'lighten the mood' joke that clearly backfired big time! My friends find your attitude odd, we are grateful to be living in this day and age and in the west where there is so much help available ... they said why focus on the negative and get so angry when that will only make things worse. My neighbour is from the US and her husband recently died but she said she would never go back to the US, where her family is, because she could never afford the health care. Her sister and brother-in-law were at her house and they kept me there for ages while they ranted about the state of health care in the US .... if you are from there, I am sorry this is happening in your country and I hope things get better for you soon. I am very grateful that I live in the UK, with the NHS and access to many different forms of HRT. Like mindfulness, living a life of gratitude is also very healthy for the mind and soul. But i think I'd better leave this discussion, like I said I would, not only because my kind of practical advise isn't what this discussion wants or is about but because the anger and negativity is not good for me! I shouldn't have got involved in the first place - wrong discussion for me. I will press the unfollow (or whatever it is called) button now and just respond to the private messages from women asking for practical advice from me. Sakura and Mee, I wish you the best for the future and hope you can find peace of mind and gratitude in your lives.

    • Posted

      Yes. Something very odd here. Can't understand why anyone would jump into a discussion about Menopause when they claim to not be bothered by the symptoms. When they think it's no big deal! Besides, all that talk about HRT in such a casual, flippant manner... it just doesn't add up. Someone trying to push some agenda for sure. Don't know what. But it's not real. Anonymity behind the keyboard, let's people say all kind of stuff.

    • Posted

      i noticed a consistent theme in her/his posts. Some sort of bashing of the US health care system. It is likely this is political. There are lots of these (paid) people jumping into various unrelated forums and inserting seemingly innocuous stuff to build a narrative that eventually influences the mind. This is not a conspiracy theory because i run a digital marketing company and people approach us all the time asking for what is known as 'forum posting' to push agendas. Naturally most respectable digital marketing companies refuse these but there are those hole in the wall companies who are quite happy to take up these assignments.

    • Posted

      Oh my gosh!!! I live in the UK! I can't get the help! I'm not happy! I used to be happy! We are all not happy here in the UK! I'm glad this lady is happy and has no issues etc but she's obviously living the menopause dream! Many of us are not, we are struggling big time - yes, here in the UK too!!! Please people, don't think it's any better here either as I feel those that are suffering and can't tolerate conventional HRT are in the same boat as the US.

      I am very grateful for my life, really I am, but as I've said I can't live it at the mo as the menopause is so debilitating! I want my old life back... asap!

      OK, another rant over! 😕

    • Posted

      Hi, you are right about US healthcare, it's terrible. I think that and people here being in debt for student loans (education also not free) definitely adds to our stress levels. Also workplaces that demand long hours, don't provide much vacation, no retirement, and no govt maternity leave. I have often thought of moving to/retiring in Europe for these reasons. We really aren't taken care of here and it adds to a lot of stress and health issues. I think it's tougher to have gratitude in these situations where you have huge student loan debt, medical care is hardly affordable, you're in debt for simply wanting a good education, and you must have a corporate job where you aren't paid the same as men, and are treated like disposable garbage. But my friends and I still say gratitude lists and all that, it's just tough when your basic needs aren't met and you feel ill all the time. Glad you aren't in same situation.

    • Posted

      I agree she did seem weirdly more like an observer/researcher than actual human needing menopause help.

    • Posted

      Get it out! You deserve to rant! We should have better options and be able to function mentally and physically. I think men have no idea really and more people need to talk about it. I actually saw a clip where a celeb was interviewed Viola Davis, famous actress and she literally said "Menopause is hell". We need to complain and talk about it so we get the care we need and deserve.

  • Posted

    Loss of libido is a common symptom of menopause. But is it a problem? I guess it depends on the individual. I note that some women on discussions in this forum welcome not having to bother with sex any more, or finding time for it ... it frees up more time to go other things and they find joy in focusing on their grandchildren. I was in the unusual situation of my libido getting stronger during perimenopause - couldn't get enough and my husband couldn't keep up, poor man!

    • Posted

      I seem to go back and forth. So strange. Thanks for sharing. Helps to know there is so many different aspects to peri.

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