Don't know where to go from here

Thank u Rebecca things r just crazy at mo I feel anxious even when I sleep its horrible I have these thoughts running through my head and I'm not even sure what they r the don't make sense it's like I'm fighting some kind of demand but I'm not sure what it's trying to get me to do .. I have had 3 different anti depressant in 3 months which isn't helping I think my head is all over the shop I'm just so scared all the time xx

I have the same issue huni, I struggle to make sense of the things that are in my head, you've put it exactly right! Like its demanding something, but I don't know what. It can be very distressing and frightening. I'm not sure why they have changed your needs so often in such a short time, did you have very bad side effects? I'm on citalopram 20mg but I think I might ask to have dose increased, I'm feeling a bit better but far from how I should feel! I hope you are feeling well soon, take care of yourself xxx

They changed them coz they thought they weren't working .. I'm really nervous about taking these new 1 tho as says they can cause suicidal thought and at the mo I haven't really been experiencing that I'm scared that it's just round the corner .. That that might be the next step which I really don't want I looked after my nan who was like it and was awful I would never wanna do that to my family and friends .. Xxx

Thank u that helps I have been given mirtazapine which I am due to start tonight .. It's almost like everyday is getting worse coz I am just sat around searching for a cure ... Hopefully I will start to feel better soon thanks for your advice I will try it and see 

Hey huni, try not to give up hope! I know it feels so hard, I do the same thing myself, searching for answers and reason and never finding any other than "I must just be a monster/evil/horrid" but I'm contacting my dr to talk about upping my dose and trying therapy. Anyone I've spoken to or read says that's therapy is one of the best options, I'm frightened but I have to try! I won't let this win without a fight!! I want my life back, please remember that we are all here for each other, I don't know if any of this helps, take care of yourself xxx

Thank u Rebecca I'm trying just so hard .. What meds r u on ? I have just taken my first mirtapine think I should of prob waited till bed time as feel a bit funny now :-/ u are a lovely person not a monster xxx

Hey luv, thanks ☺️

Im on citalopram 20mg which I think is relatively low. I've never gone beyond that dose before and I don't know if that's why I was struggling to accept that it could maybe be increased, I spoke with a friend who is studying to a therapist/councillor and she said that it is a low dose. She also said that therapy could really make a difference for me and to try and not be afraid, it's hard work but worth it! I'm just so afraid to say what goes on in my head though! But I have a phone consultation with my dr tomorrow so I can ask for a referral and to up my dose! I will let you know how it goes, stay in touch, it makes things easier if you know someone understands xxx

I have just been taken off that I was on 40 it wasn't really helping much .. I will do Hun thank u .. I have cbt starting apparently it's amazing . Hope u get on well tomorrow also let me know xx

Good luck with CBT, I've heard good things about it so fingers crossed xx

Hi both,

Rebecca, that's very exciting! I understand what you mean- my first two sessions with a therapist I was just joking (of course I was also very depressed, so I am guessing my jokes weren't very funny :P ), only the third I broke and let all out. Although, the therapy alone was not enough for me (I tried 1 year without meds) it is a great experience and the amount of insight you gain into your own thinking process, etc is amazing. Also, I got quite few coping mechanisms (such as ones I wrote above). I'm sorry, I'm talking(well, writing) too much- what I wanted to say is good luck tomorrow and keep up inspiring kick-ass attitude!

And Domdomz-fingers crossed for mirtazapine. Myself, I am waiting for my pills to work (so far 4 weeks on them and still need to rely on behavioral tricks )

hugs

Hi Syl, your not writing too much at all! I'm always keen to hear what other people's experience have been, I find it helpful. I think I am getting there one minute then the next I'm crashing back down again! Hopefully we can all find the right way for forward and feel back to ourselves again xxx

Hi guys well took the first mirtazapine and slept for 13 hours and now feel well out of it :-/ it made me go very dizzy when I took it and made me sick not sure this is normal ... Fine while I'm off sick but not when I go back to work .. I took it at 5 and had to go to bed at 6.30 and have just woken up .... Scared tO take it tonight now as have my councling telephone thing at half 9 in morning ... What to do xx

Hi. When I started fluoxetine I had same symptoms for first week or two but then it went away. Although I felt sick  and dizzy it wasn't bad enough for me not to go to work. If you feel like it makes you very sick then maybe you can ask for a smaller dose. As many meds give you side effects in the beginning. Also the calming effect in the night will wear out a bit so you should be able to sleep normally after your body adjust to meds. It is really hard to find the right medicine so I wouldn't dismiss it just yet, but again- if you feel too bad...only you can know whether you can tolerate it. xx

I just feel like I can't even get out of bed it's awful feel totally out of it xx

I'm so sorry to hear that Sounds like you are on too high dose, they should have slowly eased you in. You should talk with your doctor because mirtazapine is both antianxiety and antidepressant. What you are feeling are calming effects that practically knocked you down. I've just read that mirtazapine can have these side effects for weeks. From my own experience, oxasepam did exactly this and I could easily sleep 15 hours but I adjusted quite quickly and then it worked perfectly fine. But you definitely need to adjust the dose if you react so strongly to it. If you have any other symptoms than feeling sick, sleepy and dizzy, then this drug might not be good for you. Otherwise, I am afraid, these re quite common symptoms when you start new treatment Again, I'm sorry for the way you feel. Keep us updated on what the doc will say. Take it easy today and I hope you will feel better soon. xx

Thank u I will do think it's gona be a day in bed for me ... Feel awful :-( xx

One thing I was recommend to do is make a diary, noting all the good things and bad things, so that you can reflect and it does to a degree strength the mind and remind you of the postives but also how you managed those bad days too. if you can be strict it does help. I use a site called patientslikeme ( google it ) and I can log all sorts there and then print it of if need be to share with my gp ( should I wish ).