Excruciating pain with shingles

Don't beat yourself up,Gillian.Your caring husband was clearly worried about you.Having just lost his sister he wouldn't want anything to happen to you.Likely to have been the stress of losing his sister that brought on your shingles.He couldn't do anything for his sister but he could help you.Try and ignore his relatives-they don't sound worth bothering with.Look after yourself and your lovely husband.

Fatigue post shingles seems to linger.I am still tired after about 6 months.Try and get out of the house-will help th edepraession

Hi Gillian433545 

I think it was a very selfless act on your husbands part by not going to stay home with you while you were going through such an ordeal. Now what he had to do is let his family members know, when he took you as his wife, YOU are his FAMILY NOW.

It is HIS PLACE TO TELL HIS FAMILY TO BACK OFF!  No one and I mean NO ONE can understand the pain and other affects this disease places upon you. 

Hope that you feel better and I know it doesn’t seem like it now but you will begin to feel a little better as time goes on. Follow your dr’s orders take all your meds and report any other pains aches fevers etc that may come about as well. 

Oh I found that adding Vitamin D3 & Vitamin B6 which is the vitamin that helps with nerve function. As this hides inside the nerve cells and comes out when your stressed. So NO STRESS ( If you can avoid it!) exercise is also good to ward off stress. Again I wish onlyfor you to feel better........

I am so sorry you have been suffering with this disease. It is agonizing pain, especially with the other symptoms that accompany Herpes Zoster-Shingles. No one should be judging your husband and you. Family comes first, always! As you were very ill, I certainly understand your husband staying by your side. What matters most is how your husband treated his sister when she was alive.If you and your husband are content with the choice you both made, that is all that matters.

I do hope you started on the Antivirals immediately As you do not have excellent pain control, please contact your Physician and ask for Opioids and perhaps Gabapentin.

Also you need to sleep and rest. Any activity or exertion will increase the pain.

Ice and cool compresses will help.

Some individuals find creams with Lidocaine applied topically helpful. It numbs the nerve endings.

Please do not stress about toxic relatives. They are not worth it.

I hope this helps.

I am a Nurse Practitioner in the States. I have had recurrent Herpes Zoster-Shingles in my right ear every three to five weeks for the past twenty-one years and twice in my right eye.

Best Wishes

Merry Juliana

Your husband I am certain is sad regarding his sister, and should not have to deal with family melodrama.

Please tell your husband my deepest condolences for his loss.

Merry Juliana

Oh Gillian,

I am so sorry to hear you are suffering - and how awful that your relatives are treating you so badly.   It's an unfortunate fact that unless you have suffered, or a close to someone who has suffered, with Shingles then you don't realise how really devastating the virus is.

I am in my 3rd week now, most of the shingles are just scars now, but the area where they were on my back and tummy is numb and the area on my side and groin is so tender and painful - plus I have this awful stabbing pain in my lower back where the rash first started.which is the worst pain ever when it gets a grip, so I know what you are going through and I empathise.Gillian I really do.

I have had some wonderful advise from fellow sufferers on this forum, read through what has been said, you ma like to pick up on some of the suggested medications and remedies - but please don't beat yourself up about the funeral, you were too ill to attend, and your Husband loves you too much to see you suffer alone.  He did the right thing by staying with you, and if his family can't see that then they need to take a good long look at themselves, as you have done nothing wrong Gillian - and I am sure that your Sister in law would be saying the same thing if she were able.

Concentrate on you and your Husband and ignore those that are being so horrible to you - you need to get yourself fit and strong again - it's going to take time but you will get better as long as you take good care of yourself.  You are ill, tired and emotional at the moment, so be  kind to yourself, let yourself heal - don't look back, look forward to happier times with your caring Hubby.

Take good care Gillian - here's hoping we will all feel a lot better very soon and beat this devil of a virus.

Babs x

Dear friend. I am truly sorry for your family's loss and the pain you have endured. You are correct in that "NO ONE can possibly know how bad" except for others who have experienced the shingles. Even so, there are different degrees to each person's outbreak, as some people only have a mild outbreak, while others have extreme outbreaks that are debilitating and repetitive. I know you may feel some guilt that you held your husband back from where others felt he should have attended but your husband knows you better than anyone else and if he'd felt you could be left alone, then he would have done so. The misguided judgements of others are not your problem. Not to sound harsh but ignore it. Dealing with shingles alone, is enough for anyone's plate. I've been in that very same spot during funerals, family reunions and holidays. My best friend was where I needed him to be...at my bedside and he's never regretted it. Just as you and I would do the same if the tables were turned and our husbands were down sick. People are going to talk. Let it go, friend. Instead, spend that energy on getting well and letting your husband know how wonderful you think he is for being close at your side when you needed him the most. Stay strong and think happy thoughts : )