Extremely painful swollen first herpes outbreak, Please help!!

Hey there,

Trying to push through but I definitely feel like its getting the best of me at the moment.

Thank you so much for your reply, I've heard the first is always the worst too and I'm really praying that's the case. I too have found the bath and the shower have very quickly become my best friends but as soon as I'm out if the water the pain comes straight back.

My doctor gave me Valaclcovlr which I've been taking for two day and i think it might be helping minimise the number of sores that I have but it does nothing for the pain and swelling. I'm still waiting to hear back from my swab test whether it's type 1 or 2 and my doctor said once we get that back then she'll give me something else.

Thank you again for replying, it feels so good to be able to talk to someone about this

Awww it must be horrible but just think once they clear up and scab over the pain is gone!

Do you know how you contracted it? As you would need to tell your partner/boyfriend etc...

Yes you need to know which one it is and then get the correct antivirals for them, apparently the antivirals do work very well and minimizes the outbreaks.

You can take OTC pain killers to maybe help the pain and swelling

I'm really hoping that is the case but right now most of my pain is coming from the actual swelling rather than the sores themselves.

I would have had to have gotten it from my boyfriend, he's the only guy I've ever had sex with I'm just confused as to why I've contracted it now, we've been sleeping together for 3 months and have even had (as much as I hate that it happened) unprotected sex a couple of times, but recently we've been really good and using protection and being careful and now suddenly I have it, and I know that people can be asymptomatic and not know that they gave it but the timing of it all just confuses me that's all. I'm really scared to talk to him about it because I don't know how he's going to react.

So I've heard, hopefully ill be one of the lucky ones that have little to no re-occuring OB thanks to the antivirals. Also I've been taking OTC painkillers as often as I can but they seen to do little to no good, i feel like I need something stronger.

That is not really uncommon to be honest - 3 months minimal unprotected seems fair to me, do you think he has the virus and not told you MAYBE he doesnt know he even has it or maybe you could have been the carrier without knowing BUT he is the only one you slept with so unfortunately it does point to him, I dont know, I can judge but maybe you need to discuss it with him I think (in your own time), let the pain and all that subside and discuss it with him after, it can go either way - sorry if I sound nosey dont mean to be.

What OTC medication for the pain are you using as if paracetamol, that will do nothing for the swelling in the slightest, try ibuprofen or neurofen - not sure if you are in the UK but there is some strong over the counter pain relief out there, speak to the pharmacist if you can and explain the pain you having, they will understand 😃 including if you are using any other med's etc.

My friend uses ice in a soft cloth for the swelling and she says it works and gives relief, I think she said the swelling only lasts for a few days and then the sores begin to burst and then heal over in the next week after the swelling, try the ice and see how you get on, I hope you get some relief.

How are you feeling mentally though? If you want to talk I can listen 😃

I'm sorry to hear about your outbreak...it does suck but just know it will go away. First one usually takes about 2-3 weeks if I remember correctly. Just keep taking the Valtrex as prescribed as well as an OTC pain killer to help you. I used a water bottle whenever I peed which i found helped alot and wore loose track pants. I know you probably feel like it's the end of the world but it isn't. You learn to deal with it and the recurrent outbreaks don't hurt as much nor do they last as long - just uncomfortable but bearable. Have a chat with your boyfriend and tell him to get checked out as well. Hang in there.

That doesn't seem nosey at all, honestly any advice I can get on the situation I'll happily take. I'm almost certain given both my own and his sexual history that he is the carrier, I'm also pretty certain that he is unaware that he is though. I will talk to him about it but i feel like i need to sort myself out a little bit, both physically and mentally before having that conversation.

Ive been taking neurofen for that pain relief, I'm located in Australia unfortunetly but i might still try the pharmacy and see if they can provide anything stronger. My doctor did give me a gel which I'm pretty sure is called Lidocane or something along those lines and its meant to numb the area but I've found that it hasn't really work very effectively for me ☹

Ice pack is definitely going to be my next step so hopeful it will show some promissing result haha

I'm going surprisingly ok mentally so far, when I first found out I cried and felt like being sick but after the original shock wore off I did a heap of research and read up a bunch and honestly hearing how common it actually is and other peoples life stories with it and how intense the stigma is that's attached it is, I felt a heap better actually, I feel like at the moment alot of my mental stress is just about the pain and the conversations I need to have with people from now on

Right well you sound much better than your original post, one thing I have learnt is that talking helps so much!

I agree, take time for yourself, get physically right again and then you can speak to your boyfriend, I really hope it goes well for you, it might be a shock to him also at first but who knows these things have a way of working themselves out, you know...

Yes try the ice pack and epsom salt baths apparently they are quite good also, the swelling will go down I am sure, just keep dosing on pain relief and ice packs etc.....make yourself as comfortable as you can which ever way works for you.

Apparently its very very common, I have read that some people will get an outbreak for the first time and have the next one like a year later but they will last less and hurt less, just going back to my friend, she got her's in her 20's from a guy she was dating for 2 years, she suddenly woke up one morning and boom..... she never had any other sexual partner but him, he has never had an outbreak in his life - she leads a normal life, she had a baby about 3 years ago with him and she says she hasnt had an outbreak for about 5 years - she takes lycine and antivirals....right now your body is trying to attack the virus hence why all the horrible symptoms but in time your body will know what it is hence lesser the symptoms.

I hope you start to feel better soon... are you missing work?

I definitely think that talking about it helps for sure and being able to hear other peoples experiences dealing with it makes it seem not so scary.

I'm really hoping that the conversation goes well because i really don't want this to come between us.

I've also read that epsom salt baths are really helpful so I'm going to try them and icepacks today and hopefully they will help the swelling go down.

I'm really hoping that will be the case for me, as long as I can be taking an antiviral daily and I really hope my attacks will be minimal and much less painful.

I'm really looking forward to it feeling better too, I've read a few cases of peoples first OB lasting a month or more and I pray to hod that doesn't happen to me. Stupidly I've gone to work the last few days and so being on my feet all day and walking around has been so painful and definitely hasn't helped the swelling at all, I thankfully have a few days off now but feel like I'm just going to get it under control in terms of pain and swelling only to go back to work and have it flare up all over again. So I'm in a bit of a tricky situation there.

Thank you for you reply, i have been taking my antiviral and i feel like its definitely helping, the sores appear to be opening and trying to heal, but because everything is so extremely swollen when they do open there is no where for the moisture to go and so they are staying damp and unable to scab and heal over. Right now the swelling is causing more pain than the sores themselves. I can no longer close my legs properly because it is so swollen down there, sorry for TMI.

I've had a break though with the bathroom situation today however, thankfully, I've been drinking Ural for the last few days (Ural is is a urine alkalinizer that you mix into water and it reduces the acidity of your pee) and it has been a literal god send it feels almost normal to pee again so I would definitely recommend anyone struggling with that issue to try it.

Thank you again for the response and kind words. Definitely doing my best to push through

How are you feeling today? Better I hope, It seems you are handling this quite well so well done you!

I read you have had some relief having a pee so that very good 😃

Let me know how you are today

Contrary to what it seems things have actually gotten worse today sadly haha

The peeing relief was definitely a win for sure but I am in so much more pain today, everything is even more swollen which I didn't think was possible, but I have spent the whole day either in bed or in the bath because I literally cannot walk without being in pain. My sores have started opening too which is usually a good sign I would think but because I'm so swollen the moisture cant get out and they cant heal properly and so it is so painful.

Thank you so much for checking in ans seeing how things re going though, it is so appreciate

Oh no..... maybe the pain is worse as you say the sores have broken and once they start to heal the swelling and pain will subside....can you put anything on the sores to keep them dry? Can you maybe put some cotton wool or a soft cold cloth maybe?

There is some numbing cream you can get but to be honest if the sores are breaking and the virus is shedding it might make things worse maybe?

Yeh that's what I've been thinking, the pain is definitely due to the broken sores but the swelling also is not helping. I found the hairdryer was actually super helpful and painless (on a low setting and cold air) in drying them out but now that they are dry its so much more painful.

My doctor did give me some cream that is supossed to help numb the swelling but i found it didn't really work for me and like you said now that they are breaking i dont know how much good it would do as it would just be keeping them wet again.

Yes, I think the shedding lasts for a few days, when they start scabbing over then the shedding is over and the virus is therefore not transmittable.

The hairdryer sounds like a good idea and glad you found something has has semi worked for you, I think you need to just ride it out until the sores scab over, I wouldnt use the cream you have as you say did not really do anything for you anyway so why put it on them eh....

The swelling should go down once the shedding stops I would have thought, hopefully you not in contact with your boyfriend this weekend, could be slightly awkward?

Try getting some lycine for a herbal shop, apparently that works well for any future outbreaks

Sorry for the delayed response. The swelling is going down!!! I know that I'm on just a week into this OB but considering the pain I've delt with over the last few days the rest of this is feels like its going to be a so much easier. Today I have felt a million times better which is so good. Yeh no definitely no contact with the boyfriend this weekend haha would've made for a very uncomfortable and awkward weekend, we do plan to have a chat over the next few days though now that I'm feeling a better.

I also picked up some lysine today so that will be good to have on hand for the future which hopefully will never be as painful as this time

Hey sorry for my delayed response!

I am so happy to read that your swelling has gone down! You might be over the worst (holding thumbs) - how are you feeling today - probably when the sores start to heal and the swelling stops you will feel normal again

Yes lysine is supposed to coat the virus to prevent further outbreaks and to make them less painful and last less time.

Awww I hope your chat with your boyfriend goes well.... when are you seeing him?

Thank you, the worst is definitely over! Now that the swelling is completely gone i honestly feel almost 100% again apart from some minor itching. Almost all of my sores are gone! I definitely think that seeing my doctor as early as I did and getting an antiviral as soon as I did made a world of difference in terms of healing.

Hopefully the lysine will prove helpful, god forbid I have another outbreak. I'm also going to go back in and see my doctor tomorrow and talk about future antivirals to help with prevention and talk about steps to take from here to minimise possible risks of outbreaks.

Thank you, me too, I'm going to see him tomorrow afternoon. I'm really nervous but I feel like I've really read up on everything I can and meed to know and just need to make sure I stay calm and collected.

That is so good to read - phew you must be so relieved that the pain is gone and the swelling - you seem to have handled it very well - yes speak to your Dr and get all the things you can to make any future OB as minimal and pain free as possible 😃

Well look all the boyfriend can do is either, point a finger at you, be mad, accept it and move on, or leave.......BUT he needs to get tested also as he could be a carrier & not even know it.... one question for you - have you or him either had the facial cold sores before as this is the way it could have got down there....