Fed up.....

Posted , 16 users are following.

TKR was 3 weeks ago yesterday, and I thought I was making good progress, but today I feel like Ive been hit by a sledgehammer! 

Im getting very little sleep now, cant get comfy for love nor money. Even my "go-to" comfy places i.e. the sofa or spare bed offer no respite.

Im trying hard with the exercises, including the ones the Physios have shown me, and I know Im making progress (I managed a straight leg-lift today) but my positivity and humour seem to have vanished.....

With daughter in hospital, and the prospect of her being off work for around 3 months depending on her surgery date, Im doing my best to keep her spirits up, but I feel like Ive got nothing left.....

Poor hubby is looking at me like he doesnt know what to do or say for the best.....

Good job Ive got you lot, at least you know what Im babbling about.....


2 likes, 26 replies

26 Replies

  • Posted

    I know the feeling oh too well! I'm nearly 7 weeks and still finding it hard sleep wise ... that is the hardest for me !! Let's hope it does eventually get better! 😁 xx
  • Posted

    We sure do. I looked in my diary and that was a low point. Impatience, frustration and pain from overdoing it. I wrote sick of pain, sick of having no sleep and sick of relying on others. Now at eight weeks still get down days and soreness but with sleep it's all more manageable and I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Take one day at a time - hard for anyone to understand unless they've been there. Roller coaster ride and hold tight scream and eventually it will end
  • Posted

    I'm 3 months after a double TKR. Sleeping through the night I have yet to master. But, everyday is easier. It's still hard to sit for long periods or stand for any length of time. I do know that things are so much better. The three week mark was probably one of the toughest times. I did ask the doctor for something to help me sleep. With a few consecutive hours of sleep, the next day is always more manageable. I don't take something every night. I gave up on a full night and just bring some music or book or iPad to bed with me. When I'm not sleeping I can distract myself and then try again. Every day is a little bit easier, just remind yourself. 
    • Posted

      I have a question about double TKR . . how on earth do you manage stairs without a 'good' leg to rely on?  I've only recently been able to go down stairs properly at ten weeks, and if both knees are done at the same time it must be impossible. . . .  ????
    • Posted

      Stairs are still tough. I still need to go slow. I stopped using a cane 2 weeks ago. The first few weeks I always had my husband or one of my kids in front of me or behind me, one leg at a time. I always led with my left going up and my right going down. The first couple weeks I only did it once a day. If I took my time it was manageable. Even today, it's still slow going but to point for me is I am going. Before the operation I was struggling to walk.
    • Posted

      Glad it's been a success for you  . . It must be REALLY tough havoing a double TKR . . Hat off to you!
  • Posted

    I am 9 weeks post op now and in fact still having sleepless nights although not as much now....I remember 3 weeks thinking why would anyone have this op as it's the worst thing I've ever done but now I am so much better I know it was just the healing process and the feeling you can't do much for yourself or anyone else if you are used to being the one in control. I always cook clean go to work etc and just had to let it go and not worry...I had to do my own physio and to be truthful didn't do as much as I should but my bend is 115 and they say I'm doing well....don't worry about the tears and the down days it's all very normal and it will get better xx
  • Posted

    Every day is different, some good, some bad but eventually, fingers crossed, the balance will shift and we can appreciate the reason why we put ourselves through this.
  • Posted

    Terri, I really do know how you feel, and it's honestly a terrible time. . I think that three weeks was about my lowest point. . To begin with, it's terrible, but you think. . this is going to get better daily.  But around three weeks, and there still being so much pain, tiredness, lack of sleep, no appetite,  . . and on top of everything, the worry with your daughter.   . . I can only say that it will get better . . a couple more weeks, and you'll begin to see a real difference.  then I have to admit there are still weeks when it seems you make no progress, and it's easy to lose heart . . Maybe you are trying a bit too hard Terri?  It's also important to rest,  . . don't push yurself too hard!  cry
  • Posted

    Hi terri - Just wanted to say keep your chin up, you will get through this. Sorry about your daughter but try and stay strong for her as well as yourself.  Martin may be right in that you may be trying too hard but I guess we are all guilty of that from time to time. Take each day as it comes - you will get through this biggrin


  • Posted

    Hi Terri can only reiterate what the others have said,  it wont last forever.  Every couple of weeks it will get better.  Those first six weeks are hardest.  It is lack of sleep.  Try and not concentrate too much on exercise, you need to heal.  Best healing is at night.  Drink plenty of fluids, take meds at right time and rest.  It is a worry when our children are ill but save some time for yourself. Xx
  • Posted

    Hi Terri, I can only agree with Susan and so many others. At 3 weeks I was still taking strong painkillers, was very dependent on my husband, feeling very tired and taking a regular nap in the afternoon and had no appetite. This doesn't last but progress is very slow and, as others say, you will have days when you seem to go backwards.

    It must be hard to have the extra worry with your daughter but try to help each other.


    I'm 8 months post op now and try to measure my progress on a monthly basis rather than weekly ( and I gave up on daily progress a long time ago 😊. )

    Although I still get some discomfort I now more or less do all the things I want to do and life is just about back to normal. So, take heart, it will be worth it in the end.


  • Posted

    Yes Terri, 3 weeks probably my worst time.

    i am  just over 5 now, sleeping better, mainly because the surgical stockings are off.

    knee bend good but have to keep exercising to get my leg straight.

    Went  to specialist Friday he is giving me another 6 weeks to get my knee straight, with all the exercises etc. if it isn't by then it probably won't. I am in still a lot of pain and tearful at times. I try so hard but when your on your own not as easy.

    must get it straighter on it won't have been worth it.

    chin up xx

    • Posted

      Isn't it funny, I have a completely straight leg now but the bend, that is something else!   Before the op I was walking on a bent leg, now I just can't get more bend in it without it being so painful.   I mentioned it to physio and she says it will come.  I am 17 weeks and am losing hope a bit.  People seem to have a great bend but the straightening difficult. Not rust me to be different! Lol
    • Posted

      I am only 3 weeks in and have no problem straightening my leg at all, like you I am struggling getting the bend. I know I am early days and have struggled a bit with the exercises, I still can't do the lift off the bed without help from my resistance band, but from reading previous posts that also should come with practice. Hearing of other people's experiences at different stages is a great help and makes you feel less inadequate when you haven't quite got as far as the text book says you should.
    • Posted

      It won't be long before you are able to lift off the bed, honestly.  I didn't have a lifter, just used my hand or pj bottoms, lol... Didn't know about them.  I think rest is the most important thin, I can't emphasise it enough.   Healing is done whilst resting.   I think when you overdo exercise it sets you back as has happened to many in here.   
    • Posted

      I could not lift leg on or off the bed. A nice little nurse said "Have you got a belt to your dressing gown?" I thought well yes but what has that got to do with lifting my leg?

      Put the belt under your foot and use it as a lever.

      It was quite a while before I could do this without the belt.

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