First day on Escitalopram?

did you ever have intrusive thoughts

Just got back from the Drs shes upping my dose to 20 mg. she asked that I give it three more weeks(scary since I an so tired if this feeling of nothingness).

I am also going to a specialist to have all my hormones checked and a nuerosurgeon to rule out any possible brain issues that may be causing any issues releasing dopamine, seratonin or perasomething.

She is also putting a call into get me into a psychiatric specialist that I am currently on a waitlist for. She is going to try and get me pushed through!!!

My blood pressure is a concern as it continues to drop but she wants me to check it daily and report out to her.

ughhhhh have i mentioned that i want this to end already!!

anyway love you guys!!

we are in this together!!

intrusive thoughts as in ?

i would always be thinking and worrying . mostly worrying and obssessing about these meds and if ill ever get better. couldnt get the thoughts out of my head.

andrea good deal!!

it may be just what you need !

maybe 10 was a little to low. its tough getting the right dose.

did dr say anything about going up slow? 5 mg or so then to 10 ?

i thinki'll loose it in public cry or yell.

andrea remember you are doubling your dose so it will be a few side effects coming . and when they happen you just knowing this helps a little. but please stick with it. i know its frustrating. but when she says 3 weeks thats way to early to tell if 20 will work. it took me about 4 months to start feeling better. i think you are doing right thing seeing a psyhciatrist. and seeing other drs can get confusing and add stress. when they advise you things just remember what you know for a fact.

1 you have anxiety

2 you are not crazy

3 cit worked for you for 19 years and it will work again

4 you came off for a week and had withdrawels

5 switched to lexapro and had side effects with cit withdrawels.

6 it takes many months to start to feel better

7 you know you body

no matter what anyone tells you or what your anxiety thoughts tell you , you know these things for sure!

stick with it and hang in there!!!!

praying!!

she told me to go straight to 20 which scares me and i told her so. If i feel anything funky at all i go down to 15 and call her straight away

I have intrusive thoughts about being stuck like this. Which led to fear of death because I started obsessing over if i was stuck this was for the rest of my life id rather die then that led to dying in general. Not afraid just the constant thought of everything dies.

sure wish this hell would die and i can get back to myself.

thank you Brian

She said we are going to reevaluate in three weeks. She said by then it will be 9 weeks and though i might not be where i want too. I should feel at least somewhat better even if its in the slightest form and even if it is inconsistent. Right now in 6 weeks I have gotten worse and worse and not even the slightest bit better.

I am just going to pray the 20 works and I feel SOMETHING in the right direction.

Lynn i have had my moments and had to leave and go to my car and cry. You need to allow yourself to feel the emotions in order to overcome them!!

been there!! id be walking around at work wanting cry . have to go to bathroom or to my car or take .5 mg klonopin. my dr said dont suffer take em if you need them. its only temporary.

i used to think it would last forever it seem like it. awful!

it will pass believe me!!

you can get a pill cutter cut it 1/4 s. and go a little each week or so. ive done this going up before.

you will!!!

oh i know!!

I currently have the following;

heightened anxiety

worsened depression

intrusive thoughts

no appetite

low blood pressure

emotional flatness and depersonalization

chest tightness

no sex drive at all

brain zaps

leg spasms

and bruising

loss of interest in EVERYTHING and EVERYONE

What else can i get????

ill be paying close attention though!!

forgot to mention severe morning anxiety as well!!

none of this was an issue for me before this started!!

Day 2 on the higher dosage of 20 mg of escitalopram

morning anxiety not nearly as bad as it has been but still woke up shaky and on edge nut again not nearly as bad as before!

I'll keep you updated!!

BRIAN IT CAN TAKE LONGER THAN 6 weeks for the anxiety to end

I had a good day. NOT great but better and i will take that.

I went for a massage with my daughter came home made christmas cookies and now i am back to emotional and a mess.

Gosh this sucks!! Trying to stay positive!

Hope you both had a good day!!!

yes

took me about 3 - 4 months to feel something getting better!!

at 6 months feel a whole lot better!

i took the klonopin when i could or delt with in other ways, so so hard to do. i just pray that switching to brands i continue to get better with anxiety and my tummy.

you will start to see light at end of tunnel its so slow you wont even notice it.

i had a pretty good day ! sounds like you did to except for a blip at the end there!

I woke up this morning very emotional.

just trying to stay focused. I want to wake up and feel peaceful so badly!

my first 2 weeks was pretty good. real good day yesterday worked some overtime !

woke up at 2 am last night little sweating and dreaming then worrying about meds dosage. tensing and releasing muscles . neck tensed up this morning

my body is trying to adjust!!!

prozac is slowly coming out of my body right now.

am i have prozac withdrawals or side effects lexapro or not enough lexapro?

i do not want to go back down that rabbit hole!!!

i read a few documents that 40 mg prozac is equal to about 18 mg lexapro.

i think the reason you feel betrer right at first is you add seritonin then you feel good then your body says hey this is too much so your body doesnt give you as much seritonin you feel bad and then back and forth until steady.

two weeks i will see dr!!

my wife just called our so called family dr and they have moved 20 miles further away and nurse ive been seeing is not there anymore. weve been wanting to change family drs for a long time because the dr we went there to see has been gone for about 3 years. BUT nows not a good time. thats were i get a script for celebrex. i guess we are changing maybe for the best?

anxiety building up today.

hope yall have a good day!!!!!!!

I am going to see my obgyn who is now 90 minutes away but the drive doesn't matter.

I just trust him with every ounce of my soul and i want to know what he feels about all of this and i also want to speak to him about possible early onset menopause. Since my current Dr blew me off and said i was too young to be having issues with that. HELLO i am 48!!

anywhoo its all such a sad emotional process. Really shouldn't be this way.

I hope you have a better day Brian!!

are you on FB?

i went through the change at 47 and had my 2nd child 3 months before i turned 40. i travel an hour each way to see my shrink

saw my doc today she said i could go up to 75mg. also changed the brand of generic to one pitzer makes which is really Pristiq. 6 weeks today. No klonopin so far today

not on FB yet.

been contemplating getting back on fb

we used to be on it.

addictive!!!

my wife had an appointment at family dr today and they didnt even call her!

i go fri for my norm bloodwork and check up didnt tell us they moved or anything! the dr we used to see was like yours trust her with our life but shes been gone.

lynn did you change dose of pristiq?

yall have some great drs to drive that far!!!

the one we had before was that good we drove 30 miles to see that dr! but im not driving another 20 miles plus that to see a none caring dr! i dont know what we will doyet ?

yes going from 50mgs to 75mgs. Trying to not take klonopin afraid of addiction take .5 once at most daily.

i was taking a little at night but havent had any in couple of nights.

people with anxiety mostly dont get addicted to because like us we dont want to take. i sometimes fear it and feel guilty if i take it dont know why??

did you find you didn't need any during the day when the antideppressant kicked in. at 3 or 4 months. how much were you taking at night

I am taking my ATIVAN everyday 2-3 times as directed but never more. I want to get through my days right now so I am less worried about addiction because i just want to be calm enough to get through the day. There have been a few days where I have only taken 2. Praying the higher dose of escitalopram works but if doesn't work I'll be back to square one and that scares me so much!!

at begining of 4 months on prozac i stopped taking klonopin.

6 1/2 months ago when i change dose of prozac to 30 mg i was taking 2 a day and maybe one at night . then 1 klonopin in morning and one at night then one in motning then none. it was a gradual thing.

when i started lexapro 2 weeks ago i started taking 1 at night.

i stopped doing that but i may need to keep doing it!

i would like to find something else to help me sleep. any ideas?

tylenoil pm makes me droggy in morning.

klonopin is good for sleep it doesnt make you droggy in morning.

i know as we feel better with antideppressant we will not take klonopin or avatin , i know for a fact!!! done been there!!

but when im not leveled out and having some anxiety . im worrying and feeling guilty about taking klonopin. its just the way anxiety makes us think.

im sorry mistake told you wtong lynn .

around begining of month 5 i stopped klonopin with exception of a couple around time of seeing stomach dr.

I only took a 1/4 of a .5 once today it was torture. somedays i can do okay on none., but should have given in and took a whole one. Friday i go up to 75 pristiq.

there are 2 other antidepressants they use for sleep Trazadone and Mirtazapine both at low dose. i've been taking Mirtazapine 15mgs for 1 month.

did you cut a .5 mg klonopin into 4 pieces?

Brian this stuff has saved my sleep life!!

its called CALMFUL sleep I got it at Vitamin world

I was so skeptical but ive been sleeping everynight for two weeks since I got it!!

I tried sending a photo but it would not let me.

if you PM your number or email ill send you a photo!

yes not enough i need more

Did you have periods of sadness while recovering

Brian or me?

I cry everyday 2-3 times a day. I am surprised i have fluid left in my tear ducts.

i did early on. i havent cried in probably month or two. i have a few weird sad and guilt blips every now and then

did you try sending photo in pm?

yes of the calm sleep i use but it would not send

oh it went that time

are yalls emojis working on here ?

i may give it a try thanks andrea

Yes try it! It works and it won't mess with the meds.

My emoji's never work on here.

how are you doing BRIAN AND Andrea?

I feel like complete crap today. High anxiety and my mind is racing. Trying to stay calm. Just want to sleep.

what vitamins do you take that the doctor said were safe

I take the following:

BComplex 125

B12 liquiid form

Ashwanda

Calcium magnesium zinc

Fish oil

Womens One a day

I have been taking them for two weeks.

call me if you need to talk

yesterday felt good today much more anxiety.

pretty good to day

Brian yesterday was so much better. today i feel much mor anxious. i raised my dose to 75 mg from 50mg just popped the second pill. was it a gradual improvement

are you going to your daughters?

I am going tomorrow.......

are you feeling less anxious now. increased dose to 75 from 50.

yesterday feel good sometimes means you are improving. also you could be feeling good because you are not worrying about upping dosage. you made the decision! during recovery i always would feel a good day then a good week then a bad three days until i made it to end of tunnel.

you could be anxious today because you just upped your dose ( fear thoughts). which is most likely. or it could be a little side effect from upping dose.

i will tell you this when we are in anxiety stress mode and we change our status quo we do not like it and ugly fear thoughts starts messing with us . its only temperary.

either way you know it will pass it has before!

did your anxiety increase initially when you raised the dose?

I wish i would feel better. I have spent the whole day on the couch in and out of sleep and crying.

I'm tired. More emotionally then physically. I keep waiting to wake up wanting to feel some sense of happiness or excitement or will to do something and everyday i wake up exactly the same.

i have been only taking one .5 klonopin a day if it gets bad i'll take another. i am allowed 3 a day

What mg are you on, how many weeks in

i am on pristiq 50mgs 6 weeks.

I am 7 weeks in.

Started back on citalopram for three weeks and she changed me to escitalopram 10 mg for three weeks just upped me to 20 last week.

I feel like this is never going to end!

BRIAN Did your anxiety go up when you raised the dose

just got back from the gym managed to make 40 minutes on treadmill before anxiety over took me and came home. trying so hard not to take a klonopin, which is foolish. i try to save them for having to go out and socialize with others. how are you doing

congrats!

40 minutes is great! Congrats!

I was able to get up and make several batches of cookies. Now I am resting because I started to cry from anxiety which is self induced because i can't stop thinking ill be stuck like this.

GOOD FOR YOU. I had to go out and shake the snow off the weighted down

branches. we are supposed to have an ice

storm tonight. Then walked a half mile with the dog. NO klonopin yet trying to

exhaust myself . SIDE EFFECTS ON THIS NEW dose are anxiety slight headache and chest pain that comes and goes. i know how we bring on more anxiety but

how do you stay positive. yestrday i got so excited seeing 8 evening grosbecks at the feeder i grabbed my phone to take a picture and knocked a huge christmas

catcus on the floor missing the shot

awe thats great!

I can't wait to get excited about something again!!

I miss feeling happy and excited and relaxed the most!

ugh i just cant wait to feel those feelings again!!!

I just took a drive and cried all the way home!

hopefully will feel better soon!

is it sunny and warm ? i'm jealious

its cold and rainy!!

another good 3 days!!!!!!! stomach is getting better too!!! i doing more things other worrying about anxiety and meds. its a gradual thing but i think im seeing the light. ( knock on wood ). i being proactive at work . feeling more confident. gaining weight back, i wished that wouldnt happen though ha!!!

Hope you all are hanging in there!!! Better days are coming !!!

was your morning anxiety bad for a few months

Thats awesome Brian I am so happy for you!

I hope it continues!!

I woke up with really bad morning anxiety. Just took half an ativan. Praying that will help! I fell asleep crying so maybe that has something to do with it.

How many weeks are you in again?

morning anxiety probably around 3 or 4 months .

on prozac 30 - 6 months. started feeling better at 4 months . started feeling real good at 6 months except for stomach . changed to lexapro 10 3 weeks ago. now 3 weeks in i feel a lot better. stomach is alot better. gaining weight back.

ive been on it for 4 weeks and I just don't know!

I am still so emotional and sad all the time and i am still so anxious.

Maybe the meds are working and i am sicker then i realize?

ughhhhhhhhh

im encouraging yall to stick with it! on a certain dose and on a certain med. ive done this 4 times in 18 years on the antidepressants and every time it is 4 months better and 6 to 9 months recovered.

folks with anxiety donot like change . it takes time for body to accept med and then takes time to recovery and finally your body says hey this med is ok its not gonna hurt me.

got to give it at least 6 months to know if it works and if any side effects doesnt agree with you. for a fact i know its hard and seems like forever. learn all the tips you can to ease the suffering during recovery time. im feeling better and better but who knows im may have a blip today? had a lot of stress last night and this morning with both kids, dead battery in car, horse out in back yard, and late for work. a month ago this would have sent me over the edge. it didnt so i know im getting better!!!

i always think i dont need the ssri and i quit taking it. youd think id learn by now !!

i tried to gouup but the anxiety was too much. i had to take a KLONOPIN this morning . its just hard o believe it can get better after 6 and a half weeks

it is hard to believe. but it works so gradually you dont even notice it. thats what makes it so hard to stick with it.

did you ever have periods where bad anxiety came on real quickly. just had one got up vaccuumed and washed floors

yes sometimes i would going about the day and it would hit and build up. sometimes it would just hit me. during recovery it would depend on stress and what i was doing at the time.

is this all happening since you took the meds or even before?

it happened before and after. a little worse after med start up and then gradually got less and less the last one i had was about a week ago when my family dr moved. katecogs calls them blips. for me they are going away getting fewer and fewer!!! knock on wood!

Brian how do you keep going anxiety and chest tightness was out with 2 friends all day one klonopin this feels awful

lynn

when it was relentless every day i would take klonopin 2 or 3 times spread out over the day. i was consistant with the amount and time of day for a good while maybe a month and then i would try and drop it back if i felt better. its there to get you through your medicine sideffects. my thinking of it was to take klonopin before anxiety hit not after. even though i didnt want to. i would do this trial up and down until the ssri took over. early on i would try and only take it if i was so bad i couldnt take it anymore. but that didnt work to good for me.

I take my ativan as needed as well. TomorrowI am going to try and take 1.5 maybe 2 in the morning to see if it helps me get through my day easier.

well i was feeling real good for 2 weeks. i went see family dr for 6 month check up. the one that moved without telling us and our nurse practitioner left and thats been going downhill the care. 3 weeks ago my wife made us an appointment with a new family dr one my daughter goes to . we havent got in with them yet. well i saw the new nurse practitioner at the dr that moved on us and he said i need to stop celebrex or lower it because of gastritis. i told him about back pain and anxiety. i told him i took prozac for a year and 1/2 . and it hurt my stomach causing heartburn and that i stopped celebrex for six months during this time and i still had heartburn. i told him that i stopped prozac and started lexapro three weeks ago and stomach is gradually getting better. i told him that pin equals eorry anxiety and worry anxiety equals pain. he said celebrex is causing stomach pain. and have i considered surgery for my low back i said 4 surgeons said not to . ive done been down that road. he wants me to see an orthopedic dr. this guy doesnt even know me. im having obsessive worry anxiety today!!

andrea how are you doing?

I am the same. How are you?

I was taken off the escitalopram by my obgyn he put me back on my original med because he felt that worked for 19 years and should still work if i give it time!

Brian I have been talking to another brian everyday three times a day and I thought it was you?

i just realized that the numbers at the end of your name are different.

I feel so dumb!

im doing real good with lexapro. doing more things, more proactive, more confidence!!

met with dr today we are staying at 10 mg. yes i have talked to brian04174 i think he is on lexapro also.

when i stopped paxil after 6 years and started back a few months later it worked just the same and it took about same time till recovery around 6 months. and i had some people tell me it wont work again blah blah neg nancy.

it seems to be easier to start back up on same brand because we are familiar and comfortable with it. we with anxiety do NOT like change.!

you know cit worked before and it will work again !!! stick with it you will get there!!

thanks

keep us in the loop need encouragement. today pharmacist told me antidepressants don't help anxiety

what your pharmacist told you is so not true. you would think a pharmacist would know better. several of them are licensed for anxiety. paxil is approved for all 5 anxiety disorders, zoloft for 4 of them, lexapro 1 of them etc. even though one is not approved for one type of anxiety it works them same and it will most likely work for a type of anxiety it isnt approved for. they call that off label uses. effexor which is a snri like pristiq is approved for anxiety. antidepressants are approved for anxiety. it takes time and patience to know if it will work. hang in there and keep going!!

Did you have morning anxiety the first few months

could use a pep talk 5 days on paxil 15.

Brian how are you doing these days??

I am still struggling but doing a little better today.

I really just can't wait to have great days instead of moments but ill take what i can get and be grateful for them until u fully recover.

im doing very well!! i go back to see dr in 6 months.

having to change my primary dr though always dred that cause i take celebrex.

you just stick with it and you will get there!

hope yall have a merry christmas and happy new year!!

stick with it lynn. paxil is a good strong ssri and is approved for all 5 anxiety types and depression. i was on it for years 20 mg. i started up slow secound round of it and that helped. its gonna be a few months until you start seeing the light. dont despair or give up. stick with and one dose!! it took me about 6 months . hang in there! yall have a good holidays

thank you Brian you give me hope!!

Did you have the constant feeling of dred when the depression first hit?

I just want that to go away so badly!!

i have been on 20mgs of paxil 4 days now going to need to take more klonopin than one till it kicks in

did you get any stomach nausea and tiredness the first 2 weeks on paxil 20

yes i did. it is a result of the anxiety/depression. the negitive thinking part. just remember youve been here before its hard to see that rt now.

yes then it went away. those are deffinetly initial side effects of the meds.

went down to 15 , 20 to strong

was morning worse for you BRIAN

yes it was. would wake sweating and anxious. stick with it and the same dose. it will take time . the dr i had when i was on paxil a second time had me go up slowly to 20 mg / 5 - 7.5 - 10 - 12.5 - 15 - 20 . that worked good for me . side effects were less noticable that way.

can i take 15 in the am and 5 at night

I would check with your dr on that.

I don't see why not but I would think you'd need the full dose at the same time but I could very well be wrong.

took the whole thing

i wouldnt take it no more than once a day because you will think about more. its best for me to take in morning and forget about it. talk to you dr first. do whateverhelps you to calm down.

brian did you take klonopin more than once a day been on 20mgs 9 days on 12 days total

Brian I am so happy your doing better!!

This brings me hope even on my darkest days. 11 weeks in and I still feel so scared and so sad. I finally go the psychiatrist feb 1 only took 15 weeks.

I am going to ask him to swap me to zoloft if i haven't felt a difference by the time I see him.

They say zoloft is good for the Obsessive intrusive thoughts.

I am praying that something changes soon 11 weeks in but my body and brain just feel so exhausted and not to different from day 1.

Still anxious, panicky and sad with no sign of happiness or excitement i once had.

I am exercising and eating but 11 weeks in I am still having to force myself to eat 😦

i sure did! thats what its for your just like me you fear these meds so yoo notice every little thing. so its harder to get going on these meds.and takes a lot longer than some peoples. its hard to do try and let be take the klonopin every day as you need it. you will see the end to this just beleive have faith it will work. when i was starting and so bad i just took .5 klonopin every morning with the ssri. stick with it every time you change meds or dose clock starts over.

2019 be a good year!!!!!

andrea you have to hold out you know this med takes longer than 3 months for some people no matter what the dr says. the anxiaty we have makes us make rash decisions when i started paxil i went to him to complain anxiety was so bad and he said just stay on it so i did i was good at 6 months. second time on paxil different dr said stick with stick with it take klonopin as needed i did about 9 months i was good to go again. now the last 4 years ive been seeing a different dr i start a med and go see him complain anxiety so bad AND IT WAS! he would change meds or dose. so ive been up and down for about 4 years zoloft prozac cymbalta i look back and see the whole picture if id stuck it out with the ones that side effects didnt hurt me i would have been good in 6 months not 4 years. so the last time i saw him in dec he ask me if i wanted to go up on dose i said nope im starting to feel better. so i want to encourage you to stick with it longer than 3 months i can tell you are feeling better! you know celexa worked for you for years so it will again you know this ! you are taking celexa rght? ive finally got my confidence back even though i still have back pain and my stomach is healing up

happy new year!!!

I want to stick with it. I truly do. The last thing I want to do is start over but for me the biggest thing is the intrusive and obsessive thoughts of death that i want to stop. They're so bad and these meds nor the Benzos seem to help with those at all.

I am not changing anything as of right now but can I ask you because I'm sorry I can't remember. Did you have obsessive thoughts?

If so did they eventually subside?

That is the worse part for me right now. That and not being able to feel happy or excited. I wake up and just cry and cry sometimes all day. It's just so crazy to me.

I told my nurse practioner i was shocked its taking so long for these meds to help me even a little bit when last time they helped so fast.

She said "yea well last time you were naive".

wtf does that even mean? she didn't even know me last time I took these meds 😦

its such a long process!

did you ever get tighting in the chest from holding on to emotion. some days did you take more than (1) .5 KLONOPIN I am glad you are better

yes i had obsessive thoughts some dark thoughts couldnt focus at work crying anxiety in morning etc

crying at work thoughts were so bad sometimes i couldnt work had to find reassurance of the future will meds work etc . and headaches chest tightening back and neck aches tensed up emotional didnt want to be by myself . everything in my world that was negative was x 10 amplified! that is what anxiety does to you. try and simplify it all this is from anxiety and the medicine stops anxiety! easier said than done !

Thanks for taking the time to reply Brian.I am so happy your doing so well!

I am going to keep trecking on. The ativan keeps me calm but doesn't make me feel any better.

I am hoping the meds will level out soon. It's crazy how sad and exhausting this whole thing makes me.

i dont have those bad obsessive thoughts anymore. i cant overthink things like i was. also what i know is it took me longer the second time on this meds. ive read that happens to others also. by now you know as much as or more than drs do about you and this anxiety/depression and the meds. you lnow for a fact all this is from anxiety .dont look back like i did and say what if id tried that med a little longer id been better sooner than 4 years. for some reason its hell starting these meds. its hard i know. got to go through it i know you can get through this. read back over katecogs blog and her resources this always helped me. keep excersising that is good. ive just about gained all 15lbs back! we feel good we eat lol!!

im getting mixed up i may have already responded ?? lynn i did get chest tightness and back and neck and leg muscles would tense up. headaches. they all went away. i did take up to 4 klonopin .5 aday when i was so bad. but mostly one or 2.

thank you so much BRIAN

i tell yall lynn and andrea what else i would do because i know that going to drs or counselors with anxiety and overthinking thoughts will just put more info in my brain and cause more anxiety. this is what i would if i start thinking i cant take it im going to call dr i say what will he do well the dr im seeing now will say change med or dose i say need more time that wont help so i dont call. when i think should i go to counselor nope done be there many times 50/50 chance he will over analyze me and make it worse. like the crazy nurse that told me i would bleed to death if i keep taking celebrex for my back i need to go to an ortopedic surgeon i thought about it and said nope done been there he will put fearful thoughts in my head i need to wait until lexapro works good and calms me and then i can make decision. we have anxiety and when its bad and our big toe hurts we think our my i need to go to dr and you do and what they say do more tests makes anxiety worse. anxiety makes our thoughts and feelings and pains 10 x worse. before you make decision on drs meds or doses just say is this best for me rt now ? have i stuck with this med/ dose long enough? do i really need to see a back surgeon now ? etc etc just slow down and ask yourself a couple questions before making a decision with the drs and meds. sorry for going on and on but yall have supported me and i know yall can do it!!!

yall are so welcome! andrea klonopin also didnt help the thoughts and other anxiety issues what it did do is knock edge off and calm me and help me sleep which helped me through temporary.

brain doctor put me down to 10 said 20 was too high causing way to much anxiety..

Hi!

Are you all taking lexapro???

I am back on lexapro since 8 weeks.

but took 10mg for 5-6 weeks, 12,5 for one and now at 15mg since around 13 days.

I took lexapro in the past and it worked.

But since 2 years, I had several med changes.

I just couldnt find relief from nothing.

Doctor told me to stopped zoloft in october and I went really downhill with panick atrack, anxiety and bad depression.

since around weeks 6 back on lexapro, I started to feel less depression and anxiety.

I started to feel also inner shakiness or vibrations. Like in my stomach, arms and legs. Its there some days then stop, then start again for few days,... I had that also with zoloft. Why all a a sudden, antidepressants cause me those shakiness.?

can it be vitamine deficiencies?

I still feel anxiety but when I upped my dose at 15, I felt good for around 4 or 5 days, then then anxiety and shakiness start again?

I really dont want to change med again. Just want to be okay, and me again.

Still feel really tired most of the time.

I see Brian suggest to stick with it. 8 weeks is still early I guess....mostly with my dosage changed???

thanks for advises and support

i am on paxil for 12 days tried 20mgs but to strong lots of anxiety. start back on 10mgs tomorrow

brian says it takes 3 or more months to even out. keep going

I so hope to have relief.

cant stand this anxiety and inner shakiness.

it makes me feel really down.

I had days were I thought I was on the right track but its never constant.

Hi Brian!

I just have a question....

Did ypu experienced internal shakiness ? Im at weeks 8 and my dose was increased 13 days ago and I had glimpse of feeling better around weeks 6 and 7. But since a few days, I feel more low, anxious and nervous inside and have this shakiness in my stomach and body.

i hate it! just want some relief. And constancy. I dont want to change again since the past 2 years, i have changed too much with med and had to stopped back in october which sent me in bad bad anxiety and depression. Now its better but I have still trouble to settle and have constant relief.

Hi Lynn...Hope you're doing great!!

hi lolita im not sure on the internal shaking . the good days weeks hours and bad days weeks hours are definetly gonna happen so be prepared for that they slowly happen throughout recovery until they are gone. i had those for about 4 - 5 months. i doesnt happen all of a sudden its slowly goes away. i did have the shakes in my hands. one time in october 2015 when i was slowly coming down on zoloft and i got down to about 37.5 mgs we were out and about and i had the shakes all over i felt like i was freezing. shaking bad. i bundled up. about a week or so later the anxiety came back with a vengence. also going up on the dose on all ssris that ive taken except prozac ive had muscle tensing in legs, chest, shoulders and neck etc. they would tense release tense release etc. and most of the old injuries ive had in past hurt much worse during this time. these are side effects of ssris your body is trying to adjust. these are temporary and go away. the anxiety and fear amplifies all of these and you start thinking you have a terrible disease and you call dr , ask every friend what to do , google it, read and research, and the fear cycle continues. its so hard just try and slow down . despite my anxiety sabatoging a speedy recovery over the past few years. the positive take away is ive learned so much about ssris and this anxiety. we all want imediate relief but its not gonna happen with anxiety. its a slow process to recovery. it took a long time for the anxiety to develop so . if you are a marithon runner and you tear a tendon in your foot its gonna take longer than 6 weeks to recover more like months! most people with anxiety on here the recovery time has been a minimum of 3 months up to around 9 months. every time ive started up on these meds its taken me around 4 months to start feeling better and around 6 months to recover. when the drs say 4 to 6 weeks just change that to 4 to 6 months. when you change med or dose the recovery clock starts all over. so if the side effects like anxiety are really bothering then stick with it another two weeks and if they are still bothering you stick with it another 3 weeks and so forth. believe me i know its hard. ive went hiking in the woods just crying bad thoughts , on the tread mill at three in morning because i cant sleep. with this meds you have to sacrifice some pain short term so you will have long term recovery. i will tell you this excersise and doing things around friends will help the meds work better. water areobics in a group really helped me with ssri start up. there is a member on this website forum named katecogs she is so full of advice and encouragment . she is on the celexa and prozac forums. she has a blog with knowledge and resources that helped me get on through this. she goes into more detail on recovery ( slowing down and accepting and the ssris). i can send you her blog address and all my resources if you like. hang in there recovery is just a little time away!!

did you feel tired when you first started on paxil

yes sleepy

did you take them at night

Thank you Brian.

Of course I need time to recover. Thats one thing I didnt give myself in the past 2 years. Doc would change my med or ad othet stuff, etc. until she ask I quit med which was a total mistake after being on AD for 12 years.

I hope like you say, my side effects including anxiety, shakiness and fatigue will go away.

and yes, i would like to have the info you were telling me about.

you help a lot!

yes exactly i wouldnt give meds time enough and i would go back to dr and tell him anxiety side effects not working etc. and he would change my dose or med or add something to my ssri. i think drs either dont know how long it takes or they just dont want to tell you because it may make you more anxiuos. now he and i are on same page. ive explained all that ive learned to him. and we just leave the meds alone and let it work unless the side effects are not tolerable and clearly dont go away after 6 or so months. i was on paxil for 13 years. im on lexapro 10 and last time i saw him he said thats a low dose do you think you need to go up to 20 i said nope im getting better leave it alone. everybodys dose is different but 10 is just rt for me rt now. sending resources through PRIVATE MESSAGE.

no first thing in morning and i didnt have to think about what time im going to bed etc i just took it morning and forgot about it .

having a horrible day today

I am soo sorry for you!

I dont have a super day either. I am having my periods and back and tummy aches. More anxious and sooooo tired since few days.

Try to take care xxx

I have had two of the worse days in my 12 weeks. It's definitely not a dun experience at all. I would be happy if I could feel even the slightest relief just to give me some hope.

Psychiatrist is fitting me in tomorrow instead of 02/01 to talk about meds because my anxiety and thoughts are becoming extremely over obsessive.

I am not able to function on anything at all anymore because all i do is cry and shake.

We are all in this together but our journeys can all be the same but also different.

I pray we all get some relief soon.

did you ever try paxil

it didnt suit me!

im now 8 weeks in lexapro but 2 weeks at 15 and since a week I feel miserable ! So much anxiety in my stomach, soooo tired all day long, lethargic, whats wrong!?

brian did you ever have days like you could jump out of your skin

Lolita unfortunately those are the side effects.

They're pretty rough.

Have you tried implementing some Vitamin B and D?

I take it everyday....I t doesn't give me a ton of the energy it should but its better than nothing.

ALSO some non caffeine green tea is great also.

avacados-Pineapples-Blueberries are also great for helping with that. AGAIN it wont have you running marathons but it's a little help.

EXERCISE as well even if it is a walk around the block. ANYTHING to get moving!!

I know it is hard as I barely make it myself but as much as you can do. Stay strong sweetheart.

We are all in this together!!

Thanks !

But the anxiety is still normal you think at 8 weeks total and second at 15. Its like the first week at 15 was better???

I will try taking some vitamins.

sometimes do you feel like you could jump out of your skin

maybe....I dont know. But its mainly in my stomach and some shakiness.

Its mostly being anxioux and inconfortable for sure.

And Im 8 weeks in but second at 15mg.

I had read some of Katecogs posts and she mentionnes it can take 3 or 6 months to recover.

lynn

yes one time i was come down on paxil dosage like a dummy and one day going to work i got irritable and mad i felt weird i wanted to kick a whole in the floorboard of my car i had to take my shoes off.

my body was trying to adjust to the dosage change.

unfortunately that is indeed a side effect. Worsened anxiety.

You can also ask your Dr to give you something to calm the anxiety as well.

I take ativan once a day sometimes twice a day if the anxiety doesn't go away.

It helps but not a lot.

sorry its so bad. It does get better they say!!

STAY strong!!

Lolita have you asked your Dr for an aid to help get you through?

I am on ativan but they also have others you can take as well.

They truly help with the added anxiety

Thank you Andrea!

I do take clonazepam everyday since almost 2 years. I just hate beeing stuck with benzo since that meltdown and roller coaster on meds.

Never took those before.

But i take it at night for sleep and half dose in the afternoon as needed.

I hope I will be able on day to stop those when the lexapro finaly do is job.

Its a long road to recovery with ups and downs.

I just feel like staying in bed these days.

Must be the start-up anxiety of the dose increased like ypu say. Bit isnt it weird that its worse the second week after that increase???

lynn

thats what it felt like wanted to jump out of my skin. it goes away only temperary

Brian, you seem like you are doing good now.

I tried to read your previous post bit cant acces it.

How long have you been on lexapro.... sorry if you already told me....my concentration is low.

Finally went to the psychiatrist today.

He is keeping me on the citalopram but has added lamotrigne to help with the obsessive and racing thoughts.

Start that tonight or tomorrow depending on when pharmacy has it ready.

Praying this will help get me through until citalopram levels out for me!

He also has a plan B and Plan C ready in case i do not get results from the Lamotrigne.

This whole process is so daunting, exhausting and emotional.

Praying we all see relief soon!!

lolita i also took klonopin off and on for about 5 years through the med rollercoaster. sometimes i would take 3 x .5 mg aday . the lexapro is working good now and i sometimes take a 1/4 mg at night to help sleep.

i dont need it at all anymore. i used to hear the naysayers your gonna get addicted to it and it would scare me even more but here iam i dont need nor do i want to take it. but it did help with initial side effects for sure. hold out with that ssri and dose for at least 6 months it will work!!!

thanks brian the klonopin helps

You are nice for your response Brian.

So it took 6 months to finaly help!? what dose of lexapro are you at?

How were you around week 8?

sorry for all those questions !

I take clonazepam everyday. 1/4 during the day and 1/2 before bed since almost 2 years.

I think it help sometimes but dont want to take more cause I think it make me tired.

I use the ativan as well. I refuse to completely suffer through this.

if you need more lolita i would say try. I was afraid to take more than one ativan and one day I had such a bad panic attack intook 1 and a half and it calmed me right down and I didnt feel anymore tired then when i took 1.

There is mo need to suffer if you don't have too!!

yes thats what I will do but it makes me so tired.

glad to hear its a common side effect for people with anxiety

Do you mean the tirednesd?????

Lynn are you referring to the tiredness as being a common side effect?

lolita i started paxil 19 years ago took me 6 months to revover then i quit taking it. started back on paxil it took me 6 months or so again. took it for 7 years decided to quit. started zoloft took it for 2 years. decided to quit. heres where the rollercoaster started. started cymbalta went back to dr after 3 months ( should have waited) he added abilify . went back to dr . started paxil again after 2 months went back to dr mistake he started me on lamictal for 4 months went back to dr we changed to prozac it hurt my stomach bad i stuck with it for 6 months i recovered . i went back to dr we dropped prozac dosage by half stomach got better but by 3 months anxiety came back. we went back up on prozac dosage a little bit stomach started hurting again. decided to stick with prozac for 6 months and i recovered but still had heartburn. we did a direct swap to lexapro anxiety came back a little 2 months later im recovered and my stomach is still healing up getting better and better. so you see going back and forth to dr and flip flopping on meds only made anxiety worse.

ssris work for anxiety and depression we just have to go through some discomfort and give it at least 6 months.

stress is the main cause for anxiety.

Thanks again for your reply!

Prozac also gave me some stomach issue and bad insomnia.

This week ( second at 15mg ) , I have anxiety in my stomach when I wake up.

But stomach is making lots of noise also.

Hi Brian

How did you fair on the lamictal?

I will be starting that tonight along with my citalopram to help with the intrusive thoughts.

Just wondering if it was helpful to you at all.

these ssris do irratate stomach some but that side effects should go away take it with food

lamictal didnt do anything for me but i only took it for four months

yall as for the klonopin ive taken it off and on for five years. i dont need it now but i do take a little at night. i was scare to take etc. i used to wait as long as i could with anxiety before i took it. it was too late by then. dont do that. those of us with anxiety do not like change we like steadyness. routine. dr told me to take it every day . so what i did is i took one morning. lunch, and bedtime. if it made me to sleepy next day i would take only half in morning and lunch. and so forth . and i made it routine. adjust as you need it but take it every day until your body adjust to ssri. then you wont need it and just ease off of the klonopin. its only temporary.

did lamictal help you. is Paxil a good drug

andrea lamictal is a mood stabilizer. make sure you start up slow and gradually come off lamictal very slowly. thats what dr told me to do.

yall

as for why you feel good the first couple weeks of starting med and then feel worse anxiety tired dont want to do anything----

first of all you have hope and positivity that this ssri will work and that releases good chemicals in your brain then you realize its not working immediatly like other medicinces we take like tylenol.

second of all you body creates a certain amount of seritonin. when we add seritonin per sayby taking an ssri after a couple of weeks our body says whoa hold up something is going on we have too much seritonin. so our brain shuts down the seritonin our body is making. and then our body tries to adjust . thus the good days and bad days. until it settles. steady again

it sounds simple but its hard as hell to get through.

last time i saw my dr he said see you in 3 months i said nope make it 6 months.

you have to let it be and just try and accept it and it will be better just not immeadiate.

i tried to deny i had general anxiety for years. and other drs and theropist would say i have this or that. i finally accepted it. as a man we dont like to have a weakness and ashamed to take this med. but ive accepted it.

learn and research all you can about your condition and these meds. !!!!! knowing what it is and how to treat it is half the battle.

avoid the naysayers at all cost.

was paxil a good drug for you

Thats a good answer.

My brain is totally trying to adjust. Hope it will for sure !

I look maybe to much on the internet so I now, prefer to person such as here, you and Katecog gave me good links. Because when we chat too much, it makes worries sometimes worst.

Doc wanted me to add risperdal but I said no.

For klonopin, I see you took it on and off but also almost everyday. Thats what I do....take it everyday.

It has been a difficult week for me. Not just a day. So I wish that setback just stop.

Hope this 15mh dosage is good for me also.

thats what my psyc told me. He is starting me very low and slowley upping it until i feel like im in a good place.

Do you remember it working for you? I was also given the choice of wellbutrin but I am more focused on getting my thoughts under control and my crying to stop then i am my energy levels.

That's what I am doing Brian, the problem is that in 12 weeks I have had zero good days. I cry everyday even though i force myself to do things I still have zero interest in life my kids my husband. I make myself get up and take part in life I just cant wait to actually want to take part instead of forcing myself to do so.

I am really hoping the lamictal will help. I ALREADY have the neggy nellies telling me its a bad med stay awya and it won't help but my friend and cousin both dis well going on and coming off of it so I wondered how your experience went with it. I start tonight.

Never mind Brian i see where you answered That for me already. Thank you!!

Since we are all different I am praying it works for me as it dis for my cousin and friend.

If it doesn't he said i can try wellbutrin.

i just cant wait for the citalipram to start working again!!

ughhhhhhhh

5 weeks in on cit and 12 weeks total!!!

what dose are you at ?

Have you tried lexapro instead of citalopram? Or other ad?

Its sad you didnt have one good day! At least, it would of encourage you. Maybe it will come soon with the new one you are adding. I wish you that it works!!@@

I was on citalopram for 19 years and I missed a week because i ran out. (NEVER LET THAT HAPPEN). I was absolutely fine until I missed this dose. I woke up on severe depersonalization mode meaning i had no emotions whatsoever.

soon the panic kicked in and then the paranoia and then the obsessive thoughts of not getting better and then I became obsessed with dying.

That was all within 3 weeks of missing my meds and getting back on them. I was getting worse and worse so they switched me to lexapro for four weeks and it did not help with my obsessive intrusive thoughts and my panic and anxiety became even worse so they put me back on the citaloptam which I have been on for 5 weeks now.

They added the ativan to help me get through with the severe panic and it has definitley helped.

Now tonight I will start the lamictal to see if it can control my thoughts and stabilize my mood bringing up some of the better mood and less of the sad moods.

It has been a very long 12 week process.

Its crazy what a change in med can do.

I think when you forgot and ran out of cit, your body went into withdrawal. That can mess things up.

Then you restart and your brain had to reajust all from the start. Then they switch to lexapro. But 4 weeks is early.

After my bad withdrawal, when I started lexapro. I still wasnt good at 4 weeks. Started having good days around weeks 5, then 6 and 7 but not 100% better. Now I have a setback but my brain is still trying to adjust from my last increase 2 weeks ago.

Maybe you cit dose is not enough?

of course, its been 12 weeks and its long.

maybe cit just doesnt work on you after 19 years and that withdrawal.

i really hope for you to have recovery from the lamictal.

My dr doesnt want to raise just yet. He feels confident it'll work and wants me to stick to it 4 more weeks with the addition of the mood stabilizer.

If that doesn't work hes going to try a change.

Did you start lamictal today?

felt a little better today. did you get on well on pazil. why did you go off

tonight I will. my Dr said that it can make you very sleepy so thought I would take at 8:00.

Lynn, I think if you look at the replies above he said he took it 19 years then stopped and restated it for 7 years then stopped again and after that he took zoloft and so on.

If he took it soo long, that might of been helpfull. But sometimes people stop just to see how they will do without.

Its good that you had a better day! Thats a good sign. Then you might have more and more good moments and days.

Thats all we are waiting for!

sorry guys if i missed any posts.

lynn the reason i stopped paxil 20 mgs the first time is because i felt so good i didnt think i needed it. the second time i stopped taken it i felt like i didnt want to do anything anymore and didnt think i needed it.

paxil is a good ssri for anxiety and depression. it is approved for all 5 anxiety disorders. it is strong.

yall go to emed experts and compare all these antidepressants. all the ssris and snris work for anxiety/ depression its just time long time.

lolita my dr said to try not to talk about it or read about it. one reason i quit taken the zoloft is because i went to a natural dr/ pharmisist and he advised zoloft wasnt right for me which made anxiety worse. i should have never talked to him about it. i would still be on zoloft now. i hunted around on the web and found this forum and weeded out all the negative nellies. and the positive folks on here helped me get better. so i guess when you have anxiety you have to be careful what read and who you talk to.

im glad you didnt have to take risprrdol!!! all through recovery you will have good weeks/days and badweeks/days. these will happen just know this. kate calls them blips. gradually you will have less and less of the bad. i take 10 mg of lexapro. everybodys body is different and different life etc. no same dose or med is same for everyone. i think 20 mg is max dose for lexapro. and i think 10-20 mg is the theraputic range. do you take one 15 mg pill or a 10 and a 15?

andrea you have been on celexa for 5 weeks? were you on lexapro the other 7 weeks ?

Yes you are absolutly right!

I try to just read the positive parts. And I try now to chat only with the person who wants to hell or did. Thats more positive and encouraging.

I will start a cbt therapy (sort of) next week. I did therapy but not that kind. Because I have been off work and not well for 2 years, this program will help me socialise, work on my throughts, my daily functionning and self esteem. Cause all those had been impacted with the last 2 years.

I started to read the site that Katecogs sent me. Amazing stuff! Even if Im french, I will purchase the book.

Im trying to focus positif but I know I will need encouragements and time.

Im at 15mg. Thats my dose of lexapro and it was that 2 years ago.

When I had my burn out etc 2 years ago, my doc tried to up at 20mg. I had terrible dizziness at that time. It all started with those dizziness. I had lots of anxiety related. After 2 weeks at 20mg, I still had anxiety so my doc decided to changed. Probably that if I had left my body recover at that time, it would of been a better thing than starting the roller coaster of meds changes.

2 years after, I still have some dizziness. Doctor dont know why but think its only anxiety.

I still have it but not as much. Maybe just the last 2 days, I seem to get it a bit starting in late afternoon.

I take vitamine d cause when I stopped my meds in october, I had a bloodwork and was low.

Try to take magnesium also.

Do you guys take vitamines?

Anyway, your words and support means a lot and thank you again xx

I was on the citalioram 3 weeks they changed me to escitioram for 4 weeks and my anxiety on intrusive thoughts got so bad they agreed i should just stay on cit since it worked first time so i am back on cit for 5 weeks. I also have the ativan to get me through and my psyc added the lamictal to help with the thoughts and mood stabilizing. Thing is the only mood i have is sad so I am worried it will keep me at sad and not bring out my happy or excited moods.

Also 5 weeks in I still have zero interest in anything. It just sucks.....I am hopeful for the lamictal but worried about all the side effects and of course worried it won't work at all.

He said if i don't like this med then i can swap to wellbutrin or reluxti to aid with the citalopram

lynn how long have you been on paxil?

glad you had a good day!!!!

yes cbt is good. ive done that some its hard to find a theropist that is encouraging and clicks with you as person. like trying to find a good dr or mechanic!! if you know you have general anxiety stick with that, if you know you have depression stick with that. you do not want to get side tracked and go on a rollercoaster again!!! diziness can be also be a sideeffect i had that too when starting paxil when i would get up or a sudden move i would get dizzy. if you change dose very slowly the side effects are minimum. and the lower dose you stay on the less side effects you have. thats what my dr did change to this change dose add this or that. now i know to just hang in there with a steady dose and see what happens in 6 months!! you know for a fact celexa 15 mg worked for years so it will work again!!! just stay the course!!!

andrea

every time you change all the side effects start over. recovery starts over. and all this time you are still stuck with anxiety/depression. all the swapping causes more anxiety and depression cause you think you not getting better. so far you have been steady on celexa for 5 weeks thats way to early to tell you are not going to feel well yet this is normal. when we have anxiety everything is amplified we are sensitive to everything and what everyone says. we think different kinda make decisions in a hurry. over the past 5 years everytime i would go see dr and tell him its not working or im no better he would just change dosage or med. sometimes i think thats all they know to do. its not their body its yours and you know what to do. you know what you have . you know the celexa worked for 19 years it will work again. it may take a little longer this time. but it will work. you know this doesnt work fast. you know excersising helps and you know being around friends doing things helps etc. try and hold out and keep going you will see the light!!! try not to get side tracked keep the facts out front. its hard to do this with anxiety. when i was struggling so bad i wrote these facts down and carried them with me when i thought it would never end i would pull them out and read. if someone was telling me oh the lexapro will not work it put so and so in hospital i would read the facts i know. i even did it with the dr when we were making a decision about changing or whatever. because they see so many patients a day i want to remind him before we make a very important decision. these meds are a pain to get on every time. i had the overthinking obsessive thoughts too . they finally went away!!! are you taking the same dose celexa that you where for 19 years?

lolita i dont take any vitamins. i did try some vitamins when i was bad off didnt notice much change though but that was me its different for everyone.

im trying to catch up on my chats sorry i missed this one! or maybe i did tell you. anyway im on 10 mg since november. been a long day!!!

i know it has for yall!!

Im taking lexapro /escitalopram 15mg not celexa...lol

Whats weird is that I never had dizziness before then one day (thats 2 years ago) I had one big and almost faint. I was really tired and had anxiety from work from a while at that time.

I suffered dizziness for the past 2 years with almost all the meds changes and dosages. Even went I went med free for a month. When I started back lexapro it stopped a bit but I also started vit d.

Maybe it was a mix of med, anxiety and deficiency in vitamine.

Anyway... Im just trying to focus on recovery ! Thats all I wish for me. And for everyone suffering.

3 weeks on wednesday. is the morning anxiety the last to go?

The anxiety is just soooooo bad and the constant thoughts are so horrible. It makes it impossible to focus.

The ativan helps slightly but doesn't last very long.

We will see if the lamictal will work or not to help with the intrusive and obsessive thoughts.

I miss myself soooooo much. I miss being the wife the mom and the woman i once was. I just want to get her back or at least a portion of her.

I suppose because I had less morning anxiety but that returned went I had to up my dosage.

How do you feel with your first dose of lamictal?

I see you have lots of anxiety.

Maybe you can take a time for yourself today. Like a nice bath, a walk or write down you thoughts and destroy the paper after telling yourself with love that its just thoughts and it doenst define you. Watch a funny movie???

do you ever feel sad anxiety seems okay now can feel its in the background

i feel the same all I want to do is cry!

I just finished painting an old book shelf that i am turning into a wine bar. The whole time i wanted to cry because i wasnt enjoying it.

Have you ever done that?

I have lost interest in EVERYTHING and i have no emotions but sadness.

I just want to feel happy again. I want to get excited to see my kids or do something i love!

I haven't felt these things in so so long.

i feel sad anxiety all day and night. Never goes away. Its exhausting because that is what makes me cry.

I felt so depressed before I started Lexapro and it last until around 5 weeks. Now I dont feel low and sad like I did. It was bad. Sometimes I have low day and feel like crying. Like last week, and I was also in my periods and had a lost of anxiety.

I feel mostly anxious. Today is a bit better but the last week was much more. And of course I dont have energy or big motivation.

You just started your lamictal. I guess it will take some time to work.

I was crying and really depressed like I wrote to Lynn. Its now better but I have low days but nothing like it was. I still have the anxiety. And no energy.

But I try to just tell myself Im healing. Its hard but I really try to stay positive.

By monday, if you really feel bad, just call you doctor.

I was hospitalised 2 weeks in november thats when they started back on meds. When I got out, I wasnt healed and they told me it can take time.

If you really dont feel well, you can go and ask to be hospitalise. It was hard to let my husband and kids but I was surround and support reintroducing medication. But dont stay alone in your drpression.

its so weird last night i was planning my garden and looking at jewlery on the internet. i guess i felt hopeful couldn't fall asleep.

for me I just feel sad all of the time. I cant conjure up any emotions except sadness and fear 😦

I cant find my happiness my excitement my peace nothing.

Everything I try to bring joy to myself doesn't work and believe me I have a lot to be happy about but i just cant conjure up those feelings.

I think its in part because if my obsessive thoughts on getting better and i also obsess over death which i think is because my mom is dying.

I just want to feel relaxed and happy again.

someday!!!

I know a lot a people who didnt sleep well last...my kids and I included. Its the new moon phase and I seem to also have trouble with sleep and emotions surrouding that and full moon.

Andrea, do you do therapy?

That would help with dealing with your obsessive thoughts and your mom.

You focus on being cured but doesnt let your body have the time it needs to do so. I know its really hard, Im like that a lot. I have read some site that Brian suggested me.

We have to go throught acceptance of the fact that we live a hard situation and we dont have control over the time it takes our system and nerves to heal. We want to be okay for yesterday. Im like that and I realise that I get trap in that king of thinking too much. I will try working on that.

But remembet, if you really dont feel good, dont stay alone and consult. Go to hospital if you need to but dont suffer alone.

lynn for me the morning anxiety and the no interest kinda stopped about the same time around 5 months

andrea you will !!!

my obssesive overthing thoughts went away about 6 weeks ago finally !!!!!

Im relying on time to make my energy comes back and it gives me hope what you say because even if doctors tell us a frame time for meds to work. I know will try to allow my body and system its own time to regain that energy, etc. With no anxiety !!!! 😉

I will probably still have desperate moments but I will try to focus on the hope you message is sending.

Time, acceptance, changes, ....

I tried therapy and it didn't work out so i am going to see a new therapist in tuesday.

The first one only wanted to talk about herself and not address my issues. Hoping for better results this time.

andrea

my dr told me and ive read that anxiety will cause depression . it last so long and we dont know what to do we get overwelmed. get stuck in the fear worry anxiety cycle and then we get depressed.

lolita recovery will come !! we know it takes time and we know every one is different. and yes you will have some bad days thats for sure. they will get less and less overtime you want even notice it. stick with it and find a way to cope with bad days/weeks. !

The best therapy to help anxiety and thoughts might be cognitivo behavioral therapy.

Hope your therapist will work that way.

But any type might be good. The key is to have a good bound with the therapist. Good therapist will listen but will also confront you in a way so that we take more consciensness. Its okay to be confront in the way we think because it help us see that our way of thinking is maintaining something wrong for our self developpment.

And with our worries, anxious and depressive thoughts, we tend to think in a rigid way.

Hope you have a good bound with this therapist!

Maybe you can buy a good book about anxiety and beging to write down what talks to you. And just write about you thoughts to let them go out of your help.

Tell yourself when they come that its okay, its just thoughts ! Find that or another positive thing that you can repeat yourself lots of time during the day.

lolita, 18 days in on paxil you can still have sadness and anxiety right

Yes I know it will! It has too!

After 2 years, I just cant wait for that seriously.

I can wait for anxiety, depresion, imsecurity about everyday and curing, cant wait for all day to lift and go and make place for me to take actions in my life! To live it fully and joyfuly!

Cant wait for the 1001 symptoms to go away and make place to a zen happy me. For the shakes, the inner vibrations in my tummy, my aches, etc to be part of the past!

18 days..... Of course!!! I was still crying and way depressed! Its not even 3 weeks Lynn.

Now I deal more with my anxiety symptoms and anxiety but when I get too overwhelmed, I can have moments where I feel sad and blue but nothing to where I was.

I got in hospital for bad depression and bad panic attacks for 2 weeks and a half. They let me out when panic attacks were gone but i still had my depression and anxiety but they said it will take time to heal. Psychiatrist said 6 to 12 weeks at same dose to have full benefits of the med. But I think I remember asking her when I will cure and she said that it depends on every case. But she suggest me to allow myself time like 3-4 months. Plus the add of therapy.

I change my dose 2 weeks ago. They say that its not like starting from the start but that means you have to let more time. my nervous system is a mess from the last 2 years and the too many med changes AND the withdrawal in october. So now, I just dont want to change or add med again. Only if I have no choice but I will just try my best to give my body a break.

But you are early in your treatment. If you have to change dosage, dont wait too long and go very slow.

I just replied but its waiting to be moderated?????

But yes its normal.

Its really early in your treatment.

thank you BRIAN!!

Its crazy how the brain convinces you that you'll never ever get better.

i just want to smile again and look forward to anything at all. I don't care if its getting excited about cleaning the damn toilets. lol

I do write in my journal everynight. It was a gift from my daughter.

I am also praying this new therapist works out as well.

Thankfully i love my psychiatrist.

You made me smile....when you said that you can wait for getting excited about little things such as cleaning the toilet. Same for me ;

yea the all watching eye got you lol!!

yea love me some cleaning toilets lol!!!! had to put a new one in yesterday!!

yep! lol! Dont know why?????

the block some specific names and websites and any words that have to do with self harm . one time i mentioned a drs book that katecogs gave me and they blocked me!!!!! you never know!

Hi Lynn! So my reply from last night is now here.

How are you doing today?

And Andrea, how do you feel?

Hi Brian!

Today, I had my first cbt therapy. Its actually a group therapy 4 times a weeks and 2 hours per day for 10 weeks.

we have a psychiayrist, nurse, social worker, psychologist and other specialist following us.

we learn about anxiety / depression, tools, daily functionning, motivation, thoughts, distortion in thinking, etc, etc.

I think it will be a good thing. At least, it gives me a routine back where I have to get up and ready in the morning.

lolita thats great you have a team working with you!!! do you see them all every time ? do you see the therapist everytime and they all communicate and meet together to discuss getting to your goal? how does that work?

I had a very bad few days. Heightened anxiety and scary thoughts.

Lots of crying and believing I'll never get better.

I know I will but my brain sure convinces me otherwise during the day when my anxiety is the worse.

Lolita I am so happy your session went well!!

I start therapy tomorrow.

Praying for good Things!

It a group therapy. Every day, their is 2 specialist presenting. Like on wednesday, it the psychologists who makes sort of a team therapy were we can get support or even support the others.

If we dont feel good , we can also have psychologist therapy during the program of 10 weeks outside the hours allowed for the group. Also, during this program, its the psychiatrist who follow us regarding our medication follow up.

like on mondays, we have more theorical informations regarding the subject of the week. On tuesdays, its more like tools, how to change things, how to help our daily functionning , etc

Wednesdays is therapy and tuesdays is animate by a occupation therapist.

I just started today and it was just the presentation of the program so I dont know much but I felt good and I think it has no choice but help.

Like just to have myself get up, get ready and leave, I almost felt like if i was going to work but for 2 hours. So I think it will probably help reorganise a routine in that way and make myself be more out of the house and focus on tools for recovery instead of thinking about me, my symptoms at home.

we are 8 in the group and we always see 2 therapists per day. But we can have other meetings as needed outside the group.

Their is also one presentation for the family ( husband, parents or friend)if they want to address their questions and informed them about what we live and how to deal correctly with someone who has depression or anxiety.

I accepted to enter that group that was refered to me by the doctor at the hospital because it has been 2 years since Im not working and to give me even more tools to revover.

Andrea, do you feel you are feeling worse since starting the lamictal?

I

f so, you might want to give your doctor a call. Maybe its not working good on you. But you seem to be suffering a lot and never have a moment of rest. I know you are not suppose to see you doctor again soon but maybe give a call .

Have you ever consider going to the emergency/hospital? I know it can sound scary but they can help and supervise with finding the right med. Its just a suggestion because having scary thoughts everyday and that much anxiety is not fun at all.

Good thing for the therapy tomorrow!

Is it a psychologist? Tell her or he how you feel.

Hope you the best and I send you good vibes xxx

lolita oh that is great!!!! i dont know if we have that type of team group therapy here in the USA. if we do i would love to find it if i ever change meds or have to go through this again. as far as medical help i just see a psyhchiatrist and i did see a therapist cbt . ive saw a few therapist over the years its hard to find one that clicks along with you with the same goal. as far as the group therapy i didnt have that. this forum is kinda like that communicating with others with the same issue. that really helped me. and the family therapy would really help in my case . if you havent went through it you just dont understand ! oh yes thinking about yourself and problems sitting at home is the worst for anxiety/depression. sounds like you got everything working in rt direction for you. could you keep us posted and share some tips from your therapy?

Yess its great that i was refer to that group. Its relate to the outside clinic of mental health departement of the hospital. I live in Quebec so the medical program is really different from the USA.

Today we talked about what is rehabilitation. Of course, nothing is really new but went we have depression/anxiety issues, even if we are working in the domain, we dont see clear and it sure helps.

I was thinking a lot about what you and Katecogs said to me during the session today. Like they explained that rehabilitation is not necessarly being "cured" but to gain more empowrement over our lives but actions we make and take. Living more confortably with the disease without letting it describe who we are. We are not our depression or anxiety. And its really important to regain objectifs or dreams or passions so that we can make projects and that gives us more hope, mote satisfactions and energy. The medication is only a small part of rehabilitation, the biggest part is what we do and how we change our thinking, our actions, etc.

Our thinking, perceptions, etc are sort of a conditionning. If we do and think always the same way we condition our mind staying unwell or the opposite.

They also mentionned about curing not being in a linear way. Their is ups and downs ( windows/waves or goog moments and blips) but the more we establish a rehabilitation process, the more the blips are sort or even not as down as they used to. Keeping a journal is a good thing to make us perceive that.

And during the session, we share about the subject. Its nice to hear what other comments people bring.

I will keep you inform of course if you wish to.

Now Im back home and really tired and spacey. Its normal I guess since I havent be "working", reading, etc like that for a while.

sometimes when you come out of theraphy do you feelspaced out

not anxious but spacey

do you ever get tingling or numbing sensatins in the head is it the meds not anxious

lolita did you ever get chest tightening

yes its true!

yes and I still do sometimes.

Its anxiety.

I feel about the same but the dr said it could take a week or two for the meds to kick in.

I went to my therapist today and cried a lot but it was the first day so it was really hard.

My anxiety started out low and now its starting to pick up but its because of my thoughts.

All I think about is how i feel and how im still sick. I also have a huge obsession with thinking about dying and I think it has to do with my mom is very sick and she is dying so my therapist gave me some exercises to work on.

I am so tired and i just want to be better 😦

feeling like its not going to work is bad how do i stop.

lolita do you take any benzos to help with anxiety. how many weeks have you been on lexapro. DO YOU STILL HAVE ANXIETY

Thats a good thing you started therapy. I hope you can see her frequently. And talking to her about your mother and the fact that it brings you fear of dying, will help. Its normal to be sad and scared. I would be too. I gave health anxiety and always worry to have something wrong and die.

But you have to try to establish peaceful and positive words or sentences that you can write and stick around the house for you to see it. ( like: im healthy, its okay, i love you, one minute at a time, im positive, smile,...) Or even tell them often outloud or in your head. We have to do This a LOT to re condition our mind. (

Im also anxious and soooo tired and that tends to worry me but Im gonna try to repeat to myself....

"its okay!" "im healing!"

Its not easy I know....

thank you lolita!!

That is what I am sling all the time. I try to remind myself but when the anxiety hits hard its almost impossible to get a good thought in.

so scary!

Im on lexapro since 8weeks and half.

started at 10mg for around 5-6 weeks, then upped to 12,5 and now 15mg.

My depression was really bad and I was a mess with anxiety and full panick attacks. Now my depression is way better. Only have moments but rare. No more panicks. Just anxiety inside. Sometimes more sometimes less. But still really tired.

I replied but its moderate?!!

Yes I still have anxiety but not like it was.

My message will appear tomorrow I guess.

lynn dont try to fight it . you know you have to go through it. its gonna probably take 4 to 6 months to get to feeling better. try and stay on one dose and one med for 6 months. when i would go to a different med before my body healed . it would make it worse fear anxiety fear will it work!!! it was just an up and down cycle for me going from one med to another. stay steady on one med one dose for long time . it takes time to heal. have you tried therapy. go back and read katecogs blog she will encourage you !!!

brian did your obsessive and intrusive thoughts ever go away?

thats the worse part for me and what brings on the most anxiety.

Now that I have a therapist and psychiatrist I will only do what they say.

lynn

ive been sick at my stomach, nausiated, headach tension in neck and back today. more little side effects of ssris. and some stress catching up with me !! the anxiety part of me is saying is that pain coming from old neck injury or is it stomach gastritis getting worse again will i still be able to take celebrex and lexapro etc see that fear cycle. i tell myself ok ssris do irratate your tummy a little at first this is normal. my stomach is still try to heal gastritis due to prozac. i tell myself this is normal just try and eat better during this time. continue to take prilosec and zantac until tummy heals. headache neck pain tension could be from worrying about stomach or i could have a crick in neck or it could be from alot of stress rt now could be from knowing i have a follow up with stomach dr thur . i almost started obssessing about all this and search internet but i didnt!!! im ok its aggrivating but im ok!!! didnt feel to good today but im ok !!!! yall hang in there!!!

Yes, what you say is right ! I have more faith this week with the therapy I just begin but my symptoms are still there. Still little anxious , back aches, really exhausted, and maybe fitting a little cold. All thoses symptoms stress me. But I try to stay focus and repeat more and more to myself that its okay, its part of healing. Easier said than done! But I really wish to re-condition the way my mind and brain works right now.

I know I put too many energy thinking about my situation, my daily symptoms, my low energy, my anxiety, my this and that.....So it kind of took all the place in my life and brain and it contributes to keeping me in the same boat. I can go on the "what if this" or "what if that" all day long but I just realise its soo bad to do so. Im not sure if my symptoms will go, if med will work, if my anxiety will be gone in couple weeks or months but Im tired to rely on the scary vibes it brings me to think so.

we want peace and well being for sure! I do so much!

Did you read the blog of Katecogs and the link about intrusive thoughts ?

If not, maybe Brian can send it to you.

i have a stomach ache tonight and feel very spacey. side effects 3 weeks tomorrow

I did. I have tried everything.

I have spoken to KATE through email. She is the sweetest ever.

ive just got to be patient and work with the therapist and pray i get back to the person i once was or someone remotely close.

andrea

yes they did overthinking obssessive thoughts are gone. like i said had a little bad day and started to obssess but i stopped myself and got busy at work and the urge to obssess and read about symptoms and worry went away within in a few minutes!

lolita they are gonna put you in forum jail lol!!! you keep getting moderated!!! lol!!!

I know its hard, but keep reading those infos, they are good stuff that we dont introduce enough or in the right way in our daily life.

Sometimes we read something and something just click in our head.

Yes time, acceptance, therapy, med, but most of all we all have to MAKE actions and change our way of thinking and acting in our life!

I feel also more anxious and tired today. I talk to myself a lot. Its not a miracle cure but I promise myself to continue to change my thinking one day at a time.

They say we make a new habit by doing something (or thinking ) repetively like a thousand time. So maybe we implant that to us. Our thoughts? I dont know, its just an idea!

I know...lol

And I never say anything wrong !

going to therapy. i'll just keep taking the klonopin if it gets bad. 3 weeks today on paxil

you have taken 2 klonopin

one is not working

Do ypu mean 2 × 0,50mg pills of klonopin? what is your doc recommendation?

people have different prescription. Some takes 3 times per day.

My psychiatrist is swapping me to XANEX ER so that its in my system longer than the ATIVAN.

The ativan works ok but doesn't last too long having me to take additionals. I am prescribed up to three a day which I do wind up having to take most days but I wanted to see if the XANEX er helps since it stays in your system for up to 24 hours and i would be able to take less.

Anyone else been on it or tried it? I welcome advice.

Also lolita if your on facebook my name is andrea Haas Nurse if you want to find me on there as well 😃

i can take 3 (.5) A DAY

xanax is similar to klonopin or in other name clonazepam.

I guess it will stay longer in your system so its a good thing.

Ill check for you on fb.

So you are okay.

no afraid to take the second xanax i know its crazy. have you ever taken more than 1 a day

I dont take xanax but clonazepam that is the same as kolopin.

I take 0.25mg at bedtime and as needed.

I have it since 2 years everyday. Yes I do sometimes take 0.5mg and at hospital they gave me up to 2x 0.50mg. But I become soo tired and zombie. But Im really sensitive I guess cause others took more without problem.

You can start but splitting dose in half and see.

are you alex smith on FB?

just received a request on FB

how much klonopin do you take

dont know if i should go in the hospital again so anxious 3 weeks on paxil

Yes

I take between 0.25 to 0.50mg per day.

i just took a 2nd klonopin and feel so tired

Maybe this med is not the one for you

But did you take the klonopin?

What other med have you tried?

I am SOooooo tired, exhausted,...

I have this feeling of anxiety in my stomach.

I just cant wait for all those symptoms to go away! Its been 2 years that I tired like that. I never have energy and that makes me more anxious.

usually only take one A day not 2

Thats normal!

Its sedative and it calms the nerves/brain. I only take a quarter or half and I feel tired. When I will be felling better, I hope I will be able to withdraw it. Im on it since 2 years. Of course it help but it tends to make me tired and drowsy even at tiny dose. And it stays a bit in the system so I wonder if that contributes to my fatigue???

did you try lots of antidepressants

felt better today went to the gym for an hour and ran errands it was 3 weeks yesterday on 10 mgs for 9 days now. thanks for being here BRIAN

BRIAN , I will stay on 10 mg until i stabilize more and go up slowly 12.5, 15, maybe 20.

also im on 15 mirtazapine at night.

thats what i did 19 years ago on paxil .10 mgs for about 4 months then went to 20 mgs.