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Girlfriend has depression, and I'm finding it really hard

Posted , 8 users are following.

Worriedboyfrien
Worriedboyfrien

My girlfriend has been suffering with depression for years, since way before we met.

I understand that she can't help what happens in her head, and that when she has her "bad days" that she isn't her true self during those times.

I just find it so hard during these times, and I don't know what I can say or do to make her feel better about it.

I also work away Sunday am to Friday pm, so I can't always be there to comfort her physically.

She's having one of her bad spells right now, and is talking about not being sure if she can handle the commitment, that she doesn't know if her head can handle it, and saying that her life is just a mess.

Yesterday everything was wonderful, we had friends round, we cooked paella together, and it was all smiles and happiness. Then all of a sudden when we got in to bed last night she seemed a bit cold, and this morning when I left for work there were very few of the usual loving comments before I left.

Now she's saying that she doesn't know if we're ok, that maybe she needs space, but she doesn't know.

The problem I have is that when I'm with her, I can see when she's in a bad place. When I'm not, it's a lot harder.

It always seems that she has these bad times when her ex (father of her child) starts acting like an idiot towards her, calling her horrible names etc. This happened on Friday. It's as if we make headway with her depression and then he kicks her back to square one.

I don't know whether to give her the space she's asking for, or to just carry on as normal. I don't want to push her away. But I also don't want to let her slip away. I love her so much, and I know she loves me.

Sometimes it's just so hard, like today. When she sent me the message saying about needing space it felt like I'd been hit square in the heart.

I'm just really confused about what I should do.

2 likes, 17 replies

17 Replies

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  • muniza60065
    muniza60065 Worriedboyfrien

    Posted

    I may not be the best person to talk to but if u love her show her love can save her from herself and her past but she has to be willing to get help and sometimes it may feel like a roller coaster but hopefully it will be worth it sometimes u just. Know
  • tomhar
    tomhar Worriedboyfrien

    Posted

    Her past is still haunting her a lot. Without clearing that chapter for once and all, she will never find peace again.
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