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Omg where do I start
I've always been a worrier and started with panic attacks in my 20's. I've had lots of counselling but nothing seems to work, I was put on paroxetine and it did the job. I'm now in my 40s and suffered with anxiety off and on for years. The past few years I've been suffering with health anxiety and I'm now at an all time low. I Google my symptoms constantly sometimes over and over again on the same day. CANCER!:that's all I see. I'm now convinced I have pancreatic cancer. I've lost a stone in weight in a month and am sick with worry. I took myself off to A&E last night because I worked myself into such a state. They did lots of blood testsbut everything OK. I went back to my doctors today and she's sending me for a scan more of a peace of mind thing I think. It's the losing the weight that's frea king me out, I have lots of wind and my stomach makes noises. I've Google this and it came up with pancreatic cancer. But if it's not this cancer it's another 1. I'd rather be dead than live like this, people just don't understand and laugh at me. My partnerves is sympathetic to a point but I know I must get on his nerves. He's even threatened to take the Internet out because it's an obsession. He can't possibly know how I feel because he doesn't suffer. I'm currently on proactive because paroxetine stopped working, but don't feel like it's doing me any good. This horrendous illness has zapped all the life out of me and I can't take any more. I told the doctor I was suicidal and she just said she wold refer me to see someone.I need help now! Forgot to mention my appetite isn't great at the moment either. Feeling very frightened wish I could feel normal😓😓😓
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