Hey Mike

First of all, Happy Birthday for last Friday Mike, hope you had a great day.

Paul, do you have trouble sleeping on the mirt? I find the 15mg dose alot more beneficial.

I saw my doctor yesterday who has now put me back on the mirt, even after my first tablet last night i was able to get a good nights sleep for the first time since i came off it. I think i'm going to be stuck on the mirt for quite sometime now.

I'm glad you managed to have a good birthday and 80's night. Maybe its early days but do you think the 30MG has made a difference?

Dan, then only thing i think the Mirt did to me was give me nightmares at the beginning og the 30MG dose. I don't really think mirt has helped me one bit because i am still of work with anxiety.

I have started feeling alot better recently, i still have no motivation to do things but i don't feel down all the time. I am feeling really guilty for being off work, at the moment i just feel like i am slacking off. Having said that, god knows how i feel when i actually go into work. My problem was never being at home, it was the anxiety that work causes me which made me depressed at work. Not being at work for 2 weeks has lightened my mood alot.

If i do get to see the Mental Health Team before i return to work i don't know what i am going to say. I guess i shall have to tell them all about my emotions and feelings that i have been through because my current state of mind seems ok. It is probably the Lorazepam that is making me feel better, and the fact that i'm not at work.

Take care you both

keep in touch

Paul

PS Has either of you joined as a member of patient uk, because everytime i do it says it will send me a 2nd email to allow me to log in. It never does though.

Not heard from you in a while.

My life sucks at the moment. I called my boss today to tell him i will be returning to work on Friday. He basically told me not too. He was disappointed i still haven't seen the specialist and said that he would hate for me to go back to work and then panic again. But that is always going to be a risk whenever i go back. He recommended i go back to the doctor before i return to work. I think he thinks i should be signed off again. But my company are not going to keep paying my wages, i have already had 4 weeks off, they will have to draw the line at some point and stop paying me.

I am so confused and don't know what to do. I can't really be sure whether Friday is too soon, but i was certainly going to try and return to work. But i can't ignore the fact my boss does not think i am ready.

So depressed, confused and tired. What to do for the best.

Paul

I'm so sorry your having a rough time at the moment.

I'm with your boss see your G.P. first paul and if your signed of so be it you will still have some money coming in you should also get statatory sick pay.

i had my first councling session on friday and seemed to go well and have another booked for this friday also see my G.P. on friday.

mirt seems to be working i'm almost like my old self but then i have been busy taken up a new hobby (keeping tropical fish) and i still have two weeks left on my sick note so time will tell as it gets closer to me going back.

take and keep in touch

mike

My doc signed me off for another couple of weeks, and gave me more meds. My appointment finally came through for the Mental Health Specialist, it is 6th April. It is terrible i will definitely be back at work by then.

I spoke to my boss and we have come up with a solution. I am going to work part time for a while, to slowly get me back into it. My doc appointment today was not my regular doctor, i am going to see my regular one next Tuesday. I will suggest to him part-time working and see if he will amend my doctors note. I shall also ask him to swap my meds because mirtazapine does not work for me.

It is good you have a hobby, and i am glad you are feeling better.

Take care

Paul

Paul - Sorry to hear the Mirt isn't working for you. How long have you been taking it for now? Glad to hear your appointment has come through, is there anyway you can postpone your return to work until after your appointment?

I came off the Mirt for about 2-3 weeks and it was hell, i couldn't get a wink of sleep and subsequently my mood was terrible. Since coming back on it my mood has been better and i've been able to sleep a couple of hours a night, although i do have extremely vivid dreams and nightmares. My appetite has again gone through the roof. Just constantly craving food.

Mike- It's great that you have a hobby to occupy your mind. i play football semi-professionally and without that distraction i don't know where i would be.

I have been on mirt for at least 4-5 months now. I am on it for anxiety and in that time i have been signed of twice for anxiety. So this is how i deduce there are not working. I guess they must have some effect though, especially at 45MG. I want to tell my doc to change there mirt, but i am scared because maybe they do actually work and i don't realise it. I don't want to downwards spiral.

I reckon my doctor would sign me off for as long as i need. But i have bills to pay so thats not an option. Also, my main issue is with work, which i have to return to at some point. So if i go back to work next week or in 2 months time i am still going to be very nervous. So i must face my demons i guess. I am already nervous and i can feel myself getting more depressed at the thought of returning to work.

I don't really have a hobby, i am so non-motivated at the moment. I haven't really done anything constructive in the entire month i have had off.

Take care

Paul