Hyper awareness to my existence

, b, help

Has anyone found any sort of solution for this issue? I have been struggling with it for years and I feel my antidepressants don't help enough .

Hi there, im late to this post, but my experience just happened today and it led me down a search that brought me here.

I woke up this morning around 6am, and I almost don't know how to explain this, but my consciousness was aware that it existed. it was like my consciousness was a separate entity within me that I could observe and communicate with. the first thought I had when I woke up was "I'm conscious? why am I conscious??" it was as if my consciousness itself suddenly realized it was alive and was panicking because it "shouldn't be," like it didn't understand why it existed as opposed to the infinity of non-existence... I know I sound like a crazy person, but idk how else to put it. it asked why it existed, as if something was wrong, and I could feel it starting to panic. MIND YOU, it still was as if it was a separate being, but it was still me and I was still me. I could feel it panicking and I thought to it "it's ok, this is normal," but I could still feel it panicking and not understanding. I laid there for like 5 minutes trying to calm it down, then I thought I needed to distract myself and started watching tv. I haven't been able to go to sleep since because I don't understand what just happened. it wasn't a panic attack, because I was completely calm during the whole thing and I felt no anxiety even though my consciousness was panicking. my mother teased me and said perhaps it was a split in the personality, but it wasn't a different person, it was me 100%. I don't even know how to effectively communicate what I'm trying to say, but I'm hoping maybe someone will read this and explain it to me because now I am completely freaked out by what happened this morning.

Hey Mech, you're not alone at all. I have had this same feeling as a kid and it is a horrible experience. It used to just be a feeling I would get every once in while and would go away. I recently went through a traumatic experience and it has gotten so much worse. I feel completely overwhelmed by it and it consumes me most of the day now. I can't sleep at night anymore and I feel like I am going crazy. Everyday activities keep my mind busy but once it is time to go to bed I can't handle it. After a few sleeplesss nights I am about to seek professional help. I hope you find peace of mind and I will keep you in my prayers.

Hi everyone.

I can completely relate to what everyone is feeling/experiencing. I first dealt with this 17 years ago while having a panic attack while smoking cannabis. I have had several episodes since then, but can reassure that it always eventually passes.

It is essentially a battle between just "being" i.e auto piloting and just living, and "observing". Observing your own thoughts thinking about your own concisousness. You try to do both at the same time and you hit the paradox that is life. Its scary. But why? The mind is an incredibly complex thing. Being logical humans we want to make complete sense out of every thought and feeling. When we cant it's confusing and scary. This is where the acceptance will eventually happen - Some things just are and we don't yet know why.

There will be a stage where you become totally desensitized/ fully accept these thoughts, and the anxiety no longer triggers and therefore you lose the reason to keep "self checking". While you are in the mist of the hyper-awareness grip, it can seem unfathomable that it will ever get better, but once you anxiety is under control, you can get enjoyment back and it will no longer bother you.

I want to say "its a long road", which in a sense it is. However its really just a road that you have to keep walking. The hard work will happen along the way.

Since first dealing with this in my late teens, I have experienced some of the most memorable, loving, enjoyable and profound experiences - Including traveling, studying, getting married and having children. My latest episode was brought on by huge amounts of stress and anxiety that "pushed" me over. Before that I was 6 years COMPLETELY free from its grip. And before that, years again.

The key take away from my position is: Get the anxiety under control and the mind will follow.

Hi Guys,

please read this if you want to help support eachother through this!

Positivity Only please! i know it can be hard but lets support eachother.

I came across this today and wow a sense of relief to find people going through the same as me! i really thought it was impossible for anyone else to think this way. let me explain my current situation.

So 6 months ago i had a panic attack which sent me into a prolongued episode of derealisation/depersonalisation, this caused me to feel like i was living behind glass for months, exestential thoughts, felt like i couldnt see properly and i was in a dream, this also lead me to be in constant panic over my mental health and i was sure i was going crazy. Recently i noticed i didnt relate to the derealisation symptoms as much but i still felt an overwhelming fear and disconnection. Its like i found my own mind and eyesight and being alive totally freaky and surreal and also well aware its freaky to be scared of your own life! just waking up in the morning is so scary!

i had small episodes of this when i was young but after burning out after a panic attack it would go away. before my panic attack 6 months ago i has a long period of dealing with anxiety from work and after being attacked. i then smoked some weed to try calm be and had a panic attack because it made me feel very dizzy and weird. For a while i thought it was the weed that made me crazy but this is not the case, it was simply my body having a panic attack to losing control etc, which is why the derealization happened.

Anyway!

I think the reason we may get to this state is after having a long period of disconnect from reality, emotions, feelings. because i know i havent felt comfort,love or happiness in a while. but my point is, after being disconnected for so long and now i think things look more normal etc i think the fear and ruminating has carried over and now i percieve things as too real and like being reborn.

I think if we support eachother we can get over this! no matter how long you have thought this way. i think if we accept it and run at it head on, see it as a good thing like wow im alive, im conscious im here, i have the power to think and see. rather than seeing it as freaky, because my theory is that is only because you are a bit hyperaware right now, perhaps after going through trauma, DP/DR, depression etc.

if worst comes to worst we can all go on hyperaware hikes together and laugh about it!

i know you might be thinking i dont have it as bad as you but trust me i do, but i dont think we should be alone and scared!

i know at night you probably cant sleep well, maybe dont eat well. but take that as a sign your body and emotions just need to reconnecting! and you wouldnt be thinking this way if you were connected to these emotions snd felt safe and happy.

edit: i also think this is common with trauma sufferers, be it an an assault, a bad high etc. for me it was a bad high and i felt out of control of the high symptoms for days. the loss of control led to trauma and i believe dissociation. i have recovered from the derealization but i think that was a trauma in itself. all this leading to a disconnect. ofcourse if you feel disconncted from your past and your loved ones. you are gonna feel pretty weird in your own body. The answer lies in reconnected with your inner self, emotions etc. which i think therapist can help with, slowly your confidence should build as you find yourself again

i bet you realise that your logic mind is totally in tact and in over drive if anything! yet you still feel this way. its looking for answers to why you dont feel yourself. Find yourself, work on the trauma and you will grow.

Positive replies only guys! lets do this

hi! i wanted to let you know that I googled this feeling and found your post. I have the sudden realization that I'm alive, here, and experiencing everything all the time. several times a day. you are not alone. i was also just put on lexapro because I kept being afraid of this feeling. i hope youre doing well, though. i dont know how long ago you posted this but i wanted you to know that you arent alone.

thank you so much and being bold in sharing. i have felt the same way and couldnt describe it well.

Hello,

I'm a retired medical professional from the U.S. and would like to share my thoughts regarding your dilemma. First of all, I would like to touch upon a growing trend most common among persons in the treatment environment who have taken it upon themselves to significantly expound upon the premise of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder to include an immense multitude of OCD variants. I will state here that there is clinically only a single diagnostic classification for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, regardless of any specific factors that may be involved.

Furthermore, true OCD is not merely assessed by the presence of repetitive thoughts that are far and away more consistent with rumination. Understand that for a diagnosis of actual OCD, the presence of a compulsion must exist in all instances that has arisen in order to suppress the obsession. It is the compulsion and not the obsession that causes persons afflicted with actual OCD to seek help because it is interfering in some way with their social or occupational functions. In other words, there is no such premise defined as "hyper awareness OCD." Finally, true OCD is far more rare than people believe to be the case. You do not demonstrate the characteristics of actual OCD in any manner.

You are more likely experiencing depersonalization/de-realism as a consequence of significant anxiety, which occurs because improper nerve stimulation of the senses causes distortion of self-awareness and environmental awareness. It merely produces an alteration in the normal sensations used to constantly detect the environment.

Realize that these altered sensations can arise either due to the intense anxiety or clinical depression itself if present, or alternatively exists as a side-effect of taking SSRI or SNRI medications that alter serotonin levels.

Regardless, you're going to be just fine. Do not let the altered sensations frighten you. They do not constitute any type of permanent feature and relaxation to their presence can also diminish their impact to variable extent. If your symptoms increase, always speak directly with the prescribing physician to make adjustments where necessary.

Best regards

hi. im very very late to this but i feel relatively the same. but sometimes nothing even in particular triggers it. sometimes i just suddenly forget who and what and where i am and nothing makes sense anymore. i cant ground myself because theres nothing there to ground myself onto. I'm always so scared and currently shaking right now when typing this. nobody will see this since I'm so late but I really want to get my feelings out. I've been experiencing this since I was 12. but I've been so scared of it that now whenever I'm stresses it comes along and makes everything strange to me. oh f**k I'm getting it right now and I'm so scared. i can't describe it, but it's like nothing around you makes sense anymore and there's pressure building up in your chest and I feel like panicking its so so scary. People here are talking about like realising that this is your body and that everything is real and I get that sometimes too but I don't quite feel that that's what it is. I do think it's hyperawareness but it's just a pure feeling of not being able to comprehend anything around you. I'm always so scared : ( if someone sees this post I'd be so happy to hear if you can relate : )

This is my first time using this website... I googled asking why I have been feeling this way for the last couple years. (and honestly had some episodes when I was a kid) I am only 22 and thought I was the only person in the world going through this!! its so scary, I went to therapy for awhile for OCD habits and I feel like its connected. I am excited to start up therapy again to see exactly what's going on, I just want to thank EVERYONE on here for being so open about their experience with this. it sucks.. im grateful to be alive but it unfortunately this isn’t the best feeling to have. Again, thank you everyone for sharing. Reassurance and seeing others feeling similar goes a long way!❤❤