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I can't take it anymore!! Perimenopause horrible..HELP!

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jennifer85396
jennifer85396

I am 48 years old, stay at home mom with two children.  They are in school, I try to keep myself very busy.  I have had OCD and anxiety, I have been fighting it for years. But, now the Perimenopause is really terrible..depressed, mood swings, tension headaches, dry and itchy skin.

I have spoken to my sisters who are all past Menopause, they tell me their stories but I just cannot believe that hormones can cause all this havock.  I do not feel myself at all, my PMS is worse and the week of my period I actually feel like I have a disease and I am dying.  Feel like I am going crazy!! Please tell me if this is normal to feel this way at this time, because I am obsessing and cannot get my mind off of it.  Need Help!!!!

32 likes, 739 replies

739 Replies

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  • Karenac1965
    Karenac1965 jennifer85396

    Posted

    My girlfriend had ensomnia and had a lot of anxieity and many other symptoms. She went from one doctor To the next. They told her they couldn't test her hormones until she stopped having her periods. She had extreme ensomnia maybe only a couple of hours a night, she lost weight. Her family doc had her on anti anxiety and sleep mess to no avail. I tried to get her to see my doctor who is a intergrative medicine doc. She canceled the appointment and never went. She was so distraught and lost all hope and ended up jumping off a 4 story parking structure last week and dying. Ive been googling peri menopause and suicide to see if this is common among women and then I stumbled on your post and the insomnia. I'm not putting this up to scare anyone I'm just trying to figure this out. I would say to others on here to try and see an intergrative medicine doctor. Get a full blood work up. Get a copy of your blood work a find out what the normal numbers are. Do your research and don't give up. Sometimes you have to be your own voice. I think my girlfriend had an extreme case of perimenopause and didn't realize what the symptoms where. She thought she had some incurable disease. I tried to help but failed her.

    • julie39600
      julie39600 Karenac1965

      Posted

      Sorry to hear about the loss of your girlfriend. Peru menopause is very hard for doctors to manage as your blood hormones may come back normal if your periods are still happening. This makes it hard to convince them the symptoms are hormonal. I suffered with chest pain and impending doom which kept getting fobbed off as panic attacks. My blood pressure was dropping and I was nearly passing out but everyone assumes it's psychological. Took me a year and a empathic hospital consultant who actually did tests to make sure was nothing serious. I started lots of pills, some herbal and other prescription and now finally feel half my normal self. Still can't sleep sometimes (it's 01:15) get flushes and crushing fatigue.

      It's a tragedy that your gf didn't get any real medical help or get to know what she was going through was very real and that others understood. You certainly did your best to support her but it's very hard for anyone who is not going through this to get it and the effects it has physically and mentally.

      I wish the NHS was better informed and had clinics for this with experts but it's unlikely.

    • Space1cat
      Space1cat Karenac1965

      Posted

      Hi I’ve just read your story, I’m so sorry and very sad nothing was done to support her more..

      Bless you friend you must be devastated at losing her..

      I hope you understand more about what happened inside your girlfriend by reading all these posts, all these few women who find this page, write straight about the struggle, and we don’t mess around with words. Like being taken over!

      Wish you well my friend x and you didnt fail, you were all she had sounds like you did every thing you could x 

    • Karenac1965
      Karenac1965 Space1cat

      Posted

      So I want to make myself clear here. I'm not sure where everyone is located on this geographically? My point is you can get help with your hormones. You don't need to wait until your periods stop. Find an intergrative medicine doctor. Someone that understands the ranges of the numbers of the blood work that can help ease the symptoms. If one doc isn't getting it go to another one. If your feeling really terrible mentally and you're frustrated and feel hopeless, just know that's it's your hormones and that you will be ok and don't give up. I went through this. I know the pain and frustration. No one talks about this stuff so others don't realize what's is going on with their bodies. There is a solution.

  • tammy45904
    tammy45904 jennifer85396

    Posted

    I'm sooo over this! Pretty sure my perimenopause started about 3-4 years ago, that's looking back and thinking about some of the odd body changes... I'm almost 46 now and thought the past year was hell until about 2 months ago... For the past 2yrs I had menhorragia accompanied by bad headaches, anemia, heart palps, horrible cramps, flushing, can't lose weight, PMDD(normal to crazy in 30seconds) but at least period was still regular. I tried Prozac for the moods, especially the flippin crying for no reason but it started to make my tinnutis worse so I stopped. This past month I have had bad night sweats, my period twice (16 days apart but at least a normal flow) and BAAAD cramps, like 600mg ibuprofen every 5hrs-I chalked this up to a double dose of antibiotics and prednisone for a cold... Period stopped but a few days later boobs are very tender, which I have had this before, sleep comes in bits and every time I go to the bathroom I'm afraid to look at the toilet paper for fear of seeing blood again. I've always known my body-started my period at age 10 so it's been 35 years of this crap!! My mom and grandma went through menopause right around age 40. While I'm fairly certain all of this is due to perimenopause I still have fleeting thoughts of cancers and think I'm dying or going crazy... I'm yearly at my gyn so that gives me some piece of mind. I started a business the middle of last year and there are days now when I just don't want to leave the house. My husband tries to understand but I feel bad because since I don't know what's going on down there I avoid sex. My daughters are old enough to understand but still get bothered by my bad mood swings-even the dog gets yelled at for no reason. UGHHH!! I'm hoping that by "getting worse" means it's closer to the end??? If I could I would remove my uterus myself-enough is enough!

    • jennifer85396
      jennifer85396 tammy45904

      Posted

      OMG! tammy I am with you all the way..I am 50 now and I have myself with Cronic Fatigue Syndrome, anemia, heart problems, lung and breathing problems.  Everyday I think I am sick with something, and when I post on this site and all these incredible women give me such wonderful advice, I feel better.  But, then a week goes by and I get panicked and have terrible anxiety and depression.  Takes me forever to get motivated to do especially house work.  I don't even wear much makeup anymore when going out.  I feel like I'm falling apart.  I need constant reassurance that I am not terminally ill or sick .  I had blood work done about 8 months ago, and all was perfectly normal.  I keep reading it to reassure myself that this is Peri and not cancer or a brain tumor.  It is so hard to believe that hormones can cause such severt symptom.  66 I as I have read on this site.  I have mostly all of them at one time or another.  I try to eat right get good sleep and walk a lot with my dog, but it helps only temporarily.  I need some support again feeling very low.  I got a laugh about removing your uterus yourself, lol..I would rip out my ovaries too...!!! lets get through this together cry

    • shawnalynn
      shawnalynn jennifer85396

      Posted

      I just read what you ladies posted. No more periods are a blessing but the symptoms get worse. Trust me.
    • Pitbulllady727
      Pitbulllady727 jennifer85396

      Posted

      I swear I am living an identical life to yours. And I am so sorry! This is no way to live😭

    • cathy_34045
      cathy_34045 jennifer85396

      Posted

      OMG Jennifer you are me!!! Right now I am sitting up in bed with a hot flash snd a heart rate of 104 bpm. I have breathing problems very winded walking and going up stairs. Wore a holter monitor last weekend going for results Tuesday. Had chest xray and blood work all is normal except my horomone levels. Dr says menopause is right around the corner.....too many other symptoms to mention. Glad to know I am not alone but I am still scared of what is to come.
    • mary27278
      mary27278 cathy_34045

      Posted

      Hi Cathy

      What other symptons are you having? I wake up with symptons such as heart palpitations, anxiety, naseau. Etc

      It's seem never ending. Now I have no appetite. My quality of life has completely changed. I can't believe hormones can do all of this.

    • klm1213
      klm1213 mary27278

      Posted

      So glad I found you saying this! That is how I wake up the majority of my mornings with anxiety and a rapid pulse. Have you ever found any relief?
  • shawnalynn
    shawnalynn jennifer85396

    Posted

    Hi Jennifer,

    I never experienced peri but in my opinion it is normal. I am in forced menopause and have been for about 1 year now. I am 44 with 5 kids. I'm responding to you because I wrote the exact same think in my question that I feel like I'm going crazy. I wish there were a simple solution but I don't think there is. I'm finding some relief actually just talking to people who are going through the same thing and that makes me feel less crazy.

    Menopause is cruel and evil.

    • jennifer85396
      jennifer85396 shawnalynn

      Posted

      Wow! five children God Bless! you are a strong women.  I have heard that Menopause is terrible too.  What exactly are your symptoms with Menopause? are they similar to Peri? Or like you said, worse.  Can you tell me in what way? =((
    • shawnalynn
      shawnalynn jennifer85396

      Posted

      I'm not too sure about peri because I bypassed that and was forced into menopause due to a full hysterectomy because of cancer.

      My symptoms actually didn't start until about 1 year after my hysterectomy. I thought I was so lucky or just awesomely powerful wondering why everyone made such a big deal about menopause...boy, was I wrong.

      I have about 50+ hot flashes per day and night. They make me crazy. I also have developed insomnia. I fall asleep just fine but wake up between 3-12 times per night sometimes for long periods. I'm irritable, moody, cranky at times and I'm not sure if that's a symptom or just because I never sleep. I have zero sex drive. I've also put on about 10 lbs. I'm just a different person entirely not one that I'm proud of. I used to be so joyful all the time now I'm just "existing" I guess is the way I can put it.

      Sorry to be such a downer. Just being honest and I'm having a bad day today. Some are better than others. Today not so much.

    • jennifer85396
      jennifer85396 shawnalynn

      Posted

      hello shawnalynn, I am so sorry about your cancer. That must have been very hard for you.  I just watched a doctor on the internet talking about Peri and Menapause.  She is trying to help women feel better about all these changes and embrace them as a normal life transition.  Eat healthy, excercise, Yoga, stay hydrated.  Can you ask your doctor about something to help you sleep.? lack of rest can make everything worse. There is an end to this, but getting through it is tough.  Keep us posted on how your doing and stay strong.
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