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I can't take it anymore!! Perimenopause horrible..HELP!

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jennifer85396
jennifer85396

I am 48 years old, stay at home mom with two children.  They are in school, I try to keep myself very busy.  I have had OCD and anxiety, I have been fighting it for years. But, now the Perimenopause is really terrible..depressed, mood swings, tension headaches, dry and itchy skin.

I have spoken to my sisters who are all past Menopause, they tell me their stories but I just cannot believe that hormones can cause all this havock.  I do not feel myself at all, my PMS is worse and the week of my period I actually feel like I have a disease and I am dying.  Feel like I am going crazy!! Please tell me if this is normal to feel this way at this time, because I am obsessing and cannot get my mind off of it.  Need Help!!!!

32 likes, 739 replies

739 Replies

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  • amy341731
    amy341731 jennifer85396

    Posted

    I know this was 3 years ago but being it was still up, I wondered how you are doing now? I am 46 and at times just feel awful! I feel crazy, sick, tired..I am "pretty" sure it is all hormonal perimenopause stuff even though it's a combination of emotional and physical symptoms...anyway..just thought I'd try because a lot of this you wrote sounds like me! 😔

    • maisie05
      maisie05 amy341731

      Posted

      Yes we are here all the time Amy! I have had a lot of comfort from this forum on different discussions too. There's lots of helpful tips for coping. Or just to offload if you have no one who understands at home. Take care x

    • amy341731
      amy341731 maisie05

      Posted

      Thank you so much, it's incredible how much it helps to know others are here and understand..I can't believe I had NO idea what this whole perimenopause/menopause thing involved...never heard of it! How do people just go through life like nothing is wrong?? Lol. Thanks again, have a great day!!

    • amy341731
      amy341731 maisie05

      Posted

      Thank you so much! Just knowing we are not crazy or alone is wonderful!💕

  • leah03747
    leah03747 jennifer85396

    Posted

    Aw it awful I didn't realise that I wasn't the only one who felt this bad .. I'm trying everything and o feel as I'm not taken seriously .. I could easily become a hermit .. and that's not like me at all .. low mood and feeling like it's the end of the world .. xx

  • amanda50131
    amanda50131 jennifer85396

    Posted

    I know the posts on here are old but thank god i came across them. I thought i was dying i am 43 and have suffered panic muscle pain sweats and heart beats like mad have had numerous ecg and blood pressure checks all normal even at one point a contrast ct scan to check for clots etc. Yet still i panic still i cry because i think i am dying. My doctor is awful and is female surprised the male doctor slightly more understanding. They seem to just give me prozac and fob me off, prozac made me worse was shaking and sweating like i was withdrawing from heroin. So have stopped taking it and am just an anxious and lost mess. Asked Dr for Diazepam wow she went mad made me out to be drug addict i was given it once while on holiday as doctors needed to calm me down as short term solution on the really bad days it works and 2mg isnt a high dose or addictive. Just dont know what to do i feel like a timewaster with my A&E trips, and 111 calls and it all put down to anxiety

    • julie39600
      julie39600 amanda50131

      Posted

      Don’t feel bad, it’s all awful and unless people’s been through it they have no idea. Even my colleagues who are similar ages think I’m exaggerating as they only get flushes or sweats. Feel stupid when having attack as know it’s my hormones but as feel like going to die it’s hard not to get stressed. Saw lots of Gp before found sympathetic one. I’ve pretty much had to investigate my own medicine regime to find what works. Bit better now but still don’t go out much due to pain and fatigue. Hormones are awful, thought my periods were bad enough and Endometriosis. Stay positive and if one doctor unhelpful try another.

      Hope things improve soon, I remember my first 6-12 months and were brutal! 

    • Bellaboo1
      Bellaboo1 amanda50131

      Posted

      You really aren’t alone, I think I’m dying too. I’ve almost started clearing my house out so the kids don’t have to do it as I keep thinking the docs are missing something. I’ve had terrible anxiety which started late last year and then in January I started peeing ALOT of blood when I have my period. I’ve had cystoscopy, bladder biopsy and going for another cystoscopy this month as the last CT scan showed thickening of my bladder lining.  I’ve also got bile reflux which is horrible, makes me nauseous, weight loss. Had an endoscopy which showed all ok apart from bile in my stomach. Now I have a pain from my knee down my shin, I get pain in my right flank, heart palps, pulling type pains in my head, shakiness, tired constantly, neck pain, runny nose, the list goes on. The peeing blood is down to low oestrogen and I started on HRT and I didn’t pee blood last period, the hot flushes aren’t as bad but my anxiety is still there. I wish my docs would give me diazepam instead of fobbing me off with anti depressants. I feel like I bother them too much which makes me worse but at the moment I need a doc living with me, I have so many questions and need a lot of reassurance. I want to go back out to work but right now I’d fall apart at interviews. Sorry I’m not much help but you aren’t going mad, my mum only had hot flushes and I’m a wreck. 
    • julie39600
      julie39600 Bellaboo1

      Posted

      I take Venaflaxine and my panic attacks are rare now. They were causing chest pain, arm numbness. Blood pressure drops etc. Like you thought I would just go one day. Had a CT angiogram and endoscopy for reflux but had ulcers. Sleep on left side and found herbal tea helped as well as Ranitidine. I take black cohosh and Agnus castus for flushes and sweats. Piriton for itching.

      Can’t take HRT as made my migraines worse. I feel a bit less stressed about it all now but still have the odd attack now and then. 

      Don’t let the Doctors fob you off as you know how you feel and they don’t really understand menopause well. 

    • Bellaboo1
      Bellaboo1 julie39600

      Posted

      What isn’t venaflaxine and is it script only? I too get chest pain, numbness, cold hands and feet. It’s because it’s just so unbelievable that peri can cause all these problems that I think I might have something horrible and going to die. I’ve started Councelling last week to see if that helps but it’s this weird feeling of emptiness and loneliness and also feeling very unfeminine that is also having an impact on my mental health. I’ve always been anxious with on and off depression since I was a child but got through then wham, middle age is worse than I was back then. 

      How are you on ranitidine? I’ve been on omeprazole but doc gave me ranitidine to try but for some reason I’m scared to try them. 

    • amy341731
      amy341731 Bellaboo1

      Posted

      I am in shock at how similar the things you describe are to what I have  been experiencing! From the shin pain, neck pain, headaches, exhaustion, heart palpitations etc...How crazy that our doctors (well, mine anyway!!) have NEVER mentioned any of this, just tried to put me on lexapro, which was a million times worse! Oh and the anxiety, literally makes me feel like I’m going to die..it came on very suddenly last year and Dr answer was the lexapro which was worse and didn’t help!! Sorry to hear you’re suffering but glad we aren’t alone!! Hang in there, as soon as one symptom gets unbearable, it leaves and another one comes, so at least you know it’s “just” perimenopause!! 
    • Bellaboo1
      Bellaboo1 amy341731

      Posted

      I’m just so so hoping that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Appointments are so far apart. I’m with endocrinologist on 25th but it’s been 3 months since I last saw her and feels like a year. I’m with urologist on 11th for my bladder and that feels like a lifetime since I last saw him and the gastro docs just seem to have forgotten me even though they found bile in my stomach but I’m still losing weight, nauseous after I eat and constipated. Yesterday my left leg was really tingly and I had to keep walking around to make it stop but when I sat it came back, then I went for a pee and the tingly leg went away..another symptom sent to just freak the daylights out of me. Above everything though I want the anxiety to go away and my hair to grow back. I feel so flipping unfeminine with less than half the hair I had 10 years ago, which is when it started falling. I hope you have some luck and find the right doc/meds’ and can find a way through all this. There just seems to be so many of us but the doctors haven’t a clue. I wish I could afford the specialists in London. 
    • amy341731
      amy341731 Bellaboo1

      Posted

      So as always, I go along okay for a bit..a week at most and now I’m back to having heart palpitations, feeling like I have a bladder infection but not even that is constant, just on and off..weird cramps in legs..since yesterday..but now that leads me to wonder if stress can trigger some of the symptoms..I had a rough couple days earlier this week and now feel awful!! I guess I should at least go see my general doctor and rule out a bladder infection...just all makes me so nervous..wish that would go away too, anxiety is so bad! Let me know if you find anything that helps. I plan on taking it one day at a time. 😊

  • julie39600
    julie39600 jennifer85396

    Posted

    Yes Vena flakiness is anti depressant but works well for panic attacks. Tried Sertraline but not as good. It is on prescription. I find Ranitidine better as acts on stomach directly.  Was burping for 4-5 hours and when wind was stuck felt like my heart would stop if couldn’t burp.  This then caused impending doom etc. 

    I stopped going out on own as didn’t want this happening and also kept feeling strange when driving. Things happened more at night and couldn’t lie down or sleep. 

    Stopped chatting about it as everyone looks at you funny as don’t get it. I gave up stressful job and moved back to home town to chill a bit then all this happened. 

    Hope you get the right meds to help you, may just take a few tries. 

  • diditato50
    diditato50 jennifer85396

    Posted

    Oh my goodness I feel your pain Im 50 and its been going on for 2 years already and I just cant see the light thru the tunnel.  Im just tired of feeling this way.  Im sweating all the time my OCD is horrible due to anxiety and depression I have so I can relate.  I was on Zoloft but took myself off cuz I felt like it wasnt doing anything.  My Therapist is putting me on 150mg of Zoloft in order to see if it will help.  Last Thursday I had an IUD put on so I can remove my birth control pills and have an estrogen patch well not to say things have gotten worse it seems my body cant handle the IUD so apart from all the issues of Peri Menopause I now have severe cramps.  
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