I have LS and HSV2…

Hi Maggie,

I had a hysterectomy when I was 32. The doctor left my ovaries. A year after the hysterectomy I was diagnosed with LS. I am 53 now. I've managed my LS well. In January I got Hvs 2. My first OB was something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Then in March I had a second OB, I could handle it. What I'm asking is how do you get over the stigma of HVS2? My husband gave it to me, we are separated now. I feel like if I ever decide to date, how can I? I know many people have this but I'm devastated.

Thanks Maggie, I have been fortunate to of only had two outbreaks and not in the vagina but when you have this LS it makes me think I will be more prone. So want to get a handle on this condition...thank you for your input.

Hi Maggie, I have hid behind mine HSV2 for years and years. I haven’t dated anyone for years for the same reason, I didn’t want the guy to know. Rejection can take a big toll on your self esteem. Also, I work at a large hospital, was always worried the guy would tell everyone. Media has everything to do with “stigma”, they are allowed to present it as if it were a filthy disease when actually it is no different than the people who carry the same thing on their lips, that is not a cold sore...it’s herpes.90% of the world has herepes. 1 in 6 people have genital. I think it would be grand for everyone who has it to flood movie producers to stop making jokes at this and for talk host and pubic forums to get it straight. It the advertisers started marketing cold sores as herpes of the lips everyone would never make another joke because their family and friends would not think it amusing. Now that I have LS and Vulvadynia That can be my excuse. I have to see if I can get better and then I am going to try and meet someone. I am only 60 and now am feeling incredibly fearful about my future...things have not gone well. Blessings to you...try to date someone out of the area. My ex husband lived in another state, I did tell him, he did not care because he had it on the lip..

Just one other thought on the HSV2, many people have no idea they have it and only find out when someone does a blood test. No one is immune, the chance is there. We need serious education in schools about sex and self esteem....

Hi Marylou, as with most of us on here, I believe initial diagnosis is devastating when it's something affecting our sexuality. All that time ago it upset me a great deal, but over time it's significance faded, and just enjoyed a good sex life, taking Acyclovir when needed, and avoided foods which can bring on an attack etc. Many things can affect our self-esteem I think, I used to have thrush a lot regardless of diet changes, but since Fluconazole became available some time ago, that transformed things for me, including drinking Kefir probiotic drinks, also may help with LS, according to some ladies on here. I was devastated again after being diagnosed with LS, but over time you adjust to it. I am well-controlled now, never had itching or burning yet, but some fusing around the perineum fourchette area, may have surgery, don't know yet. But my main concern now is disappearing labia minora. I don't have white skin on there, but think it may be vaginal atrophy. Since the menopause/hysterectomy October 2016 I've become a different woman. I used to love sex, but with all these problems, including mental ones, I've lost my interest in any intimacy, the total opposite to how I was. I honestly don't know if I'll ever feel like sharing myself with a man again :-(

Hi Linda, thanks, you're very welcome. I used to get maybe one blister around my anal or perineum area, thank goodness, not often lately x

Hi Maggie,

Thanks so much for your reply. I have a bit of white skin, so using my Clob, but had no symptoms. Intercourse is painful for me, but since my OBgyn recommended the vaginal dilator it's helped. I have some fusing over my clitoris. Left labia has shrunk a little, so having LS all these years I've been fortunate.

I had alot of issues with my bowels and urine retention during my first OB. To be honest I haven't changed my lifestyle except using coconut oil. It took awhile for my bowels to get back to normal. I try and eat well, take my vitamins, avoiding stress has been impossible, but no OB, thank God. My doctor doesn't have me on suppressive. I feel fortunate, my second ob wasn't bad. My husband gave me the hvs2. March 26 he went to work and never returned. So it's been difficult, and I feel it will be impossible for me to ever date or get close to a man.

Hi Maggie, 

May I ask how you control HSV outbreak? How many outbreaks did you have and what foods do you usually avoid? My first outbreak was in March and I had flu like symptoms on and off for more than a months. I really want to feel normal again. Thanks!

Hi Qiang, the best treatment for any herpes is Acyclovir tablets. I very rarely get anything these days, but when I do feel an ache or whatever, I use something I got off Amazon. I can't remember the name off-grid, but it looks a bit like a lipstick, black base and silver lid. You press a small button and a tiny area on the end of the stick heats up for a few seconds. I zap the area where a blister is starting to form and it often stops it developing altogether. I just take Acyclovir when I feel an episode coming on and it can knock it out before much happens. Diet wise, arginine can bring on an attack, this is in nuts and seeds etc. Look up on internet for more info. Lysine counteracts arginine, you can buy this from health food stores. They are both amino acids by the way. Hope this helps x

Hi hun. I am 36 and also have HSV2 and LS. (along with many other rare non curable things). I find that the hardest part about any disease is wondering what our quality of life is going to be like. "whose gonna like me now?" etc. i got HSV2 from a boyfriend about 12 years ago when i was 24. we split up but not because of the herpes. i dated around, it was surprisingly very easy to date non std people... I met a guy who i then married, he did not have HSV. we were together for 6 years he never contracted hsv from me. we divorced because he became a grouch LoL. and now im in a happy relationship with a new man who accepts me for me, with all my "flaws" and conditions. I met him off an STD dating site "positive singles". i cant even begin to tell you how happy i am with him. LS is new to me, im talkin like days new, so i havent told my boyfriend yet the extent of this condition. He knows i have a white area and thats all ive been able to tell him so far. hes a great guy and i know he will stick by my side through this, its just ME that is having a hard time accepting yet ANOTHER issue with my body that apparently hates me. Its our own self inflicted fear that gets in the way of being open and free and happy.

Anyways, there is so much life to be had! get out there, feel sexy/pretty/confident, join the dating site just to get your feet wet and talk to people of the opposite sex who are in situations just like you.

Newly diagnosed conditions sure make us crazy dont they? You'll be fine and life will be fine too!

xo

Hi hun, thanks so much for the post to me. I still haven't tried dating or meeting anyone. I won't lie, i miss talking to the opposite sex, just normal everyday things. I did share my secret as i call it with a male friend. He wanted to know more about it, he tried to convince me i got it off a toilet seat! Ha ha ha I read everything  i could initially on HSV2, now not so much. I know you have to disclose, and of course i would, i think i am not interested in sex because of the fact i could infect someone even using a condom and think i could be viral shedding at anytime. I did read, outbreaks lessen, which has been true. But in the first year you have a higher percentage of viral shedding. My doctor wont let me take daily suppression tablets, but if i ever get in a LTR i will insist. Also i don't want any other STD's lol so i will share i have a virus that causes gential herpes and ask if they have anything LOL 

This forum is a great source of information for LS, i just felt having the two things, makes life a bit more difficult because symptoms can be similar. If you ever feel your doctor isn't invested in your LS care, please find a new one, so many doctors or gyno's don't know a lot about LS. Like i said ive had LS for a long time, from the first advice my OBGYN gave me, i did, and i think that has been important to my success with my LS. Of course i wish i didn't have to have a routine to keep my lady parts in check If you have any questions feel free to ask. 

Thank you again for your positive words, they mean alot!!

xo