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I’m scared I’ll never be pain free again. How to think more positively?

Posted , 5 users are following.

maria38027
maria38027

I know my case might not be as severe as some of yours out there, but I’m worried and anxious and sad right now so I’m gonna tell my story.

I’m a 22-year-old female living in the UK. My knee pain (both my knees) started in 2013. I had been doing intense cardio exercises for 4 months or before, all of a sudden, my pain started during my cardio session. The pain was so bad I had to stop. I remember the next day I walked to school and the pain was so bad I could barely walk and I was in tears. I went to my doctor and he said I “stretched “ my MCLs and recommended rest and a gel that was supposed to help with the pain and reduce inflammation. My knees weren’t swollen or anything and I could bend them normally, just that they were very sore. The pain went away in 2-3 weeks.

In 2014 I started working out again (squats and lunges with no weights this time), but after the second session  the pain started again. Went to see an orthopaedist, he took an X-ray , everything was normal and he said I was suffering from Osgood-Schlatter Disease. The pain went away in 2 or 3 weeks again with rest.

Less than a month ago I was really determined to start working out again so I tried to do a few simple leg exercises and I noticed my knees were a tiny bit sore. I decided to see a physio and after a long conversation she said I have Patellofemoral pain syndrome. We did a few shoulder bridges and stuff like that to see what hurts and what doesn’t and the session left me in pain, but only like 3/10 pain. 

When I got home I did a few leg extensions and my knees started hurting even more. The next day I had to go to work (my job is really physical, I work at McDonald’s) and by the end of my shift I was in agony. I had worked here for more than a year and never had knee pain before doing those exercises. 

I had to take time off from work, but I went back after 5 days like an idiot. I don’t know if I made it worse or not, the pain is always there even when I rest,

 Naproxen does help a, but it doesn’t remove the pain completely. I had to stop taking it because it gave me acid reflux. Tomorrow is my last day of work and after that I’m gonna be off for at least 2 weeks. I also have another appointment with my doctor tomorrow. He hasn’t been of much help tbh, he told me not to go to work if I felt like it was too much. Ordered another X-ray which was fine, I want to ask him  tomorrow’ to refer me to an MRI. He also recommended me to get a blood test which I haven’t yet because I have the worst blood phobia ever.

now I’m scared that my pain won’t go away like it used to do in the past because I went back to work while I was still in pain.

i get pain on the right and left side of patella, under it especially when walking and sometimes behind the knee cap.

My left knee also feels very tight or something like that, it’s hard to explain, when I’m in bed, resting. It’s a weird sensation. I sometimes get pain in my quads and down to my feet as well which I don’t know if I used to in the past as it was a few years ago and I don’t really remember.

i know I might sound dramatic but I’m really scared I won’t be able to enjoy the rest of my life cause of this knee problem. There’s a concert on the 13th to which my friends are going but I don’t know if I should go I’m so scared that every move is gonna make it worse, I’m not even sure if I’m supposed to be in bed all day or not. I can’t afford to go back to physio either.

Just looking for support and people with similar experiences. Sorry if this was hard to read. English is not my first language and grammar is not really my thing either.

 

0 likes, 20 replies

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  • maria38027
    maria38027

    Posted

    My knees also feel stiff and the pain can be burning, stinging, dull, I don’t even know.
  • Somny17
    Somny17 maria38027

    Posted

    Naproxen won’t touch that kind of pain. I suggest hydrocodone and if doc won’t give you that then I suggest Tylenol 3. I have been in pain for 9 weeks following 2nd knee surgery . If pain pills make you nauseous then ask for nausea medicine  to take at bedtime . Phenergan is a good one that I took religiously when I was on chemotherapy years ago. 
    • maria38027
      maria38027 Somny17

      Posted

      Thank you! I’ll see what doctor suggests tomorrow. I’m really scared to take anything tbh because I don’t want to destroy my stomach as well. I wish you all the best and hopefully we’ll be pain free soon enough.
  • fran70537
    fran70537 maria38027

    Posted

    So sorry to hear you are in so much pain ,I myself to answer one of your questions is no do go to bed all day , but do not over do walking etc. I think you should go to your doctors again and again until they can sort you out with a pain relief that works for you ,get you to a specialist for a diagnosis for what is wrong with your knees but you will have to be brave and get the blood tests done so much can be found out from blood tests .Having tests done is nothing compared to the pain you are obviously in,and there will be an end to your painful knee's when you find out what's wrong and get the problem sorted. Whatever pain relief that works for you take it regularly and don't let the pain take hold .This is only my opinion after just having a knee replacement operation ,I too was in a lot of pain ,mine was arthritis pain ,but after having the operation ,the pain is know where near as bad as the pain I was in .I am not saying you have the same problem as I had ,just that whatever is wrong be strong and brave and get it sorted because the outcome will be better than the pain you are obviously having now ,don't do too much ,take your prescribed medication and rest .Hope this makes sense and helps , If you are not happy with one doctor , go and see another ,you can ask to be referred to a physio at your local hospital on the NHS and that is free .

    • maria38027
      maria38027 fran70537

      Posted

      Thank you so much for your reply and for your encouragement. I promise I won’t give although there are times when I just lie in bed and cry thinking that it’s only going to get worse. I hate going to the doctors but I’ll need to figure out what’s going on with me. I promise I’ll book a blood test tomorrow as well. At first I didn’t really see the point of if , but now I understand...

      I think for now I have to focus on my knees and forget about everything else. I have holidays booked in May but now I’m thinking I might not be able to go. That’s life, I guess there will be other holidays to look forward to when I feel better. 

      I had to wait 2 weeks for the appointment tomorrow so I feel like I’m just wasting time doing nothing to get better. Maybe I just need to be more patient and accept that some things don’t happen over night.

      Thanks again and wish you all the best!

    • fran70537
      fran70537 maria38027

      Posted

      hi Maria ,After my total knee replacement on the 1st of Feb,absolutely no artheritis pain at all ,only pain from operation and exercises which have to be done and its a different pain nothing or not near as painful as artheritis . and at the end of it I will be back to normal walking again ,its not easy but you have to think of the end result and for me that's not far away,, now gets easier with pain relief and exercise both very important. .you must take pain relief to be able to do the excercises . Do not leave your doctors without getting good pain relief ,blood test app. which can determine whats wrong and from there referrals to the right specialist for your specific problem . DO not give in , there will be a  solution to your problem be positive and you will get there . There is no need to be in so much pain nowadays .  

    • maria38027
      maria38027 fran70537

      Posted

      I’m happy to hear future looks bright for you! Keep going, I’m sure you’ll be back to normal soon enough. You give me hope, thank you. It’ll all be fine. Just need to have faith and be positive. Lying in bed, crying doesn’t really help.
    • maria38027
      maria38027 fran70537

      Posted

      Hi! That’s me back from my doc now. Booked my blood test for next Thursday and he said I can’t get an MRI before the blood test. Need to see if we can find anything in my blood first.  He gave me something for my stomach so I can be able to keep taking Naproxen.
    • fran70537
      fran70537 maria38027

      Posted

      Yes that's quite right your bloods will tell a lot about what's wrong ,glad you made the appointment ,the thing is now will you keep the appointment !!!! .Nothing will get sorted it you don't ,you have at least taken the first step with making it NOW MAKE SURE YOU GO please .🙋x.I take 1 Naproxene in the morning with 2 Paracetamol and the same at bedtime .I also take Omeprasol ( I don't know if that's spelt correctly)1 either in the morning of at night .(That's to stop stomach upset ).So glad that you are going to get help .🙋

    • maria38027
      maria38027 fran70537

      Posted

      I promise I’ll go, a friend is coming with me so I won’t be alone. I’ll survive. I’m in a lot of pain right now after a long day at work and off my pain killers, but I’m glad I can take as much time off as I need. I’m not looking forward to being in bed all day but I’m ready for it because I’m not well and it’s not fair to do that to my body.

      Keep in touch.

      xoxo

    • maria38027
      maria38027 fran70537

      Posted

      Hi! I did the blood test woohoo. Wasn’t too bad, my boyfriend was there with me to support me tho. Now have to wait a week for the results. 
  • Oldfatguy1
    Oldfatguy1 maria38027

    Posted

    You are between a rock an a hard spot. Fear and pain are difficult to deal with especially when you are young and inexperienced. As far as getting blood tests.......close your eyes and look away. It will only take a minute and you will be the better for it. My suggestion that you find a sports medicine Dr before you go a by further. Even though this isn't a sports injury, some if the symptoms parallel sports injuries. You may need an MRI. Mris pick soft tissue damage where Xrays only report bone issues. Most often, in young people, these things, although painful, can be resolved with therapy, etc. There is one thing that should be resolved, a rare tumor that most often hits young people and its called PVNS. I doubt it's the culprit as it causes really severe, almost crippling pain plus possible severe bleeding. That's what started my problem and continues to create havoc. It didn't hit me till I was 65 and still bothering me at 81. It takes a good radiologist to find it but an MRI or biopsy are the only way. Keep us advised.

    • maria38027
      maria38027 Oldfatguy1

      Posted

      Hi! I booked my blood test for next Thursday so there is no turn back now. If they can’t find anything in my blood test, they’ll give me an MRI. Any tips on how to cope with the fear? I feel like it’s making everything 10 times worse.
    • Oldfatguy1
      Oldfatguy1 maria38027

      Posted

      Talk to your Dr well in advance about your fears. Maybe there is something they can give you to get you by for a fee minutes. Fear is very real and shouldn't be ignored. The old "bite the bullet" routine just doesn't work for everyone.

    • maria38027
      maria38027 Oldfatguy1

      Posted

      I did tell my doctor but he didn’t take me seriously tbh. I hope I won’t faint lol.
    • Oldfatguy1
      Oldfatguy1 maria38027

      Posted

      Very unprofessional but I guess that's all you can do except reinforce it over and over.

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