I still don't feel the same after smoking weed for the first time. NEED SUPPORT PLEASE

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i have been really suffering... alot

i feel like i have been changed forever and literally talking about it makes me want to cry abit like even going out with family doesnt feel the same and i wish i could just go back in time and not try it

i just wanted to get the normal high and now i cant even live a normal life

i struggle with basic tasks and have short term memory loss but only at sertain random intervals

it feels like all my memories are melting into one and i cant imagine living in the normal world its like im out of it

i think we all have the memory loss and dont know it fully because look

say a random sentence right now out loud

then straight after you/me doubt yourself straight away on wether u imagined it or you actually said it but that will always happen and random actual memory loss

i first tried weed in my town centre and now it feels like anytime i go back there i get a ptsd and get high and panic attack... help me mentally

like HOW IS IT REAL PLZ HELP LIKE HOW CAN I BE LIVING LIFE IN A WEIRD WAY AND NOONE CAN HELP ME PLEASE I JUDT WANNA BE ME AGAAIN BUT ABIT OF ME JUST DIED CUZ OF A BIT OF S****Y WEED SHOWING OFF INFRONT OF MY FRIENDS NOW IM LAYED JN BED WONDERING IF IM EVEN HOLDING MY OHONE

BUT FR HOW IS IT POSSIBLE HOW CAN I BE LAGGING ALMOST AND MY ACTUAL LUFE BE WEIRD JUST FIX ME

everything your saying Im literally going through I’m i haven’t felt the same and the whole anxiety stuff and even the scared of going mentally ill im terrified of I’m sorry it happened it is very scary i know 😦 just know you're not alone 😃

I smoked weed for the first time about 5-6 years ago, we were playing this game called baseball, it's where u inhale & pass it around to everyone & u dont exhale until the blunt gets back to you, then you exhale & do it again, after the 3rd time of it going around i started feeling very weird, my head started spinning, i was so dizzy, i was tripping out, i was freaking out telling the people i was with to take me to the hospital and they would not so i ran outside and while outside running around freaking out trying to get help it felt like i was going in and out of consciousness, well i ended up going back inside realizing that i wasnt getting any help, they gave me bananas and milk and told me to just go to sleep, i did not want to, i wanted to call my mom and go to the hospital, well i eventually just layed down and fell asleep, woke up the next morning & i still felt really weird, it was like i didnt feel real, everything felt made up or something like that, idk how to explain it well i had to go to school, while at school, out of no where i had the same "spell" if thats what you wanna call it happen again, i started freaking out, i felt like i was dying, it felt like my brain was going out in a way. these "spells" kept happening for a while but eventually stopped, here i am, now 20 years old, i still feel weird, i dont have the "spells" anymore, havent had it in a long long time but i still feel weird, i dont feel the same, i feel as if time is going by SO SO fast, idk if that makes sense but thats how it seems, time just seems like its going by so fast, i feel like im living life in 2x speed, i still feel like some things arent real, it doesnt affect the way i live tho, i just ignore it & i keep going, i havent ever said anything about this but just was in bed and thinking about it and wanted to see if i could find anyone who has had this problem and is having to live their everyday life with dealing with this and everyone thinking youre perfectly fine, and another thing, im not depressed, im not sad, i have everything i want, i never get mad, i cant remember the last time i cried or felt sad. i dont think it has anything to do with depression. everything i seen on the internet said it was something to do with depression. i have never been depressed, i just want to feel normal again, and not have to live life in 2x speed.

I'm surprised how much I relate to you on my most recent bad trip, Ive had two previous bad trips or in the Uk as we call it "whitey" and those times I was extremely paranoid and out of control. The first one, my head would keep twisting to the side without me telling my brain to do so, which made me panic terribly. After that I swore I wouldn't associate myself with cannabis again, though later I told myself that because I was in the woods and not at home, that I had a bad reaction, or it was laced because my friends mentioned something was wrong with the joint. Second time I smoked was in the dark with my friends, hoping id have a good reaction, all my friends did but of course not me! We were walking around in the dark to get the smell off, and then it hit, it felt like everyone was being suspicious, like they were pretending to keep calm whilst simultaneously speed walking away from something in the dark. I got extremely paranoid and had a panic attack, all whilst there was nothing wrong, we were simply walking around whilst i thought we were being followed. (the head thing also happened again except i could stop it) It felt like I was completely aware of all the effects that were happening to me, every time something new would happen i would shout it out to my friends in disbelief, it wasnt good sensations and experiences, they made me feel anxious and not good. That was worse than the first for me. The most recent time, I decided I really maybe did need to be in a comfortable safe place like a warm cosy house, so I ate a 100mg gummy with my friends at their house. We all had the same type of gummy and it hit us all at the same time. My first realisation was that i had immense tingling all over my face and body, almost uncomfortable, though after the tingles got painful, I ignored it because at first it was a pretty good trip, me and my friends were laughing none stop about absolutely everything to the point my stomach hurt. I'm not sure at which point i fell into my little 'paralysis' but it happened on the couch. I could hear and feel everything but i could not move or speak, my eyes were shut, and i could hear my friends laughing thinking i was asleep. Fyi, i was not. I was stuck in like a paralysis, which i managed to slightly get out of and run to the bathroom because i could feel myself gagging. Ran to throw up in the toilet, and this is where I was completely gone. On top of the toilet I may have fallen asleep or something along those lines, I was conscious in my head, but not in a physical place, There were horrible painful flashes, (the worst pain i have ever felt) in sort of the shape of a triangle, going around. The pain flashes were really unbearable because each flash was like pain, then it fading out and teasing me into thinking it would stop and then carrying on into a loop forever. It felt eternal and i thought it'd never stop. In the moment I thought I was in hell, like I was certain that's exactly how hell felt and that id be in it forever. I still have the doubt that what if it was? After those trips, Id been really paranoid just like you, knowing how easily I could go psychotic. I thought Id always be in control of my thoughts and it was impossible for me to be out of control. But I feel like i'm very likely to lose myself and it scares me.

After my last bad trip, Ive felt like i havent been completely there, maybe this isnt even real. After that trip it had made me scared of dying, because thats the closest ive felt to what not existing meant. Usually i wasnt able to process the thought of not existing or being "dead", but when i was in that flashing state, it felt like i didnt exist. So that made me question what if that is where i go when i die? No one knows the answer so no one can convince me that that isnt where we go. Was never scared of dying until i felt that.

Hey i took an edible about a week ago and feel a little bit better. just crazy anxiety. While i was high my "inner monologue" was just a lot louder than usual.

Now after the fact, i experience little glimpses of that and makes me feel out of it and anxious all over again. Almost like a flashback. Its not voices or anything but just random sounds. I don't LITERALLY hear it but its more like a thought thats extra vivid and can imagine the sound that accompanies it.

Does ANYONE else experience this? If i dwell on it too long i feel like im going crazy, but I know its just me reliving that experience. Is this PTSD?? idk im just confused and a little freaked out and cant find anything online.

I just want everyone to know that you CAN most definitely over come this. Just like many of you, I had experienced that same feeling "reality not quite being the same" and everything almost being off in a way I couldn't explain. I was visiting a friend in a state where this was legal and I had never tried it before. I wanted to go the hospital and had tremors in the morning. The fear of losing my grip on reality lasted for weeks after.

Guys, what you have to understand is that you are already back in normal reality. Yes! it may not seem like it, but it's true. What is happening is that much like I did, I kept reliving my trauma and convincing myself that things were not the same, even though it was just pure fear and psychological trauma. Take this head on. Continue to live your life, focus on your goals and what makes you happy, have fun with friends or family, play video games, join a gym. Do not let this own you! Pretty soon, you'll forget all about your "second perspective reality" and enjoy the same life you've actually always had. I know it's hard, and it may feel like it will never end but it will! You just have to escape your own psychological trap! If you think it will help, seek therapy, or join a support group. But you will come back, even if it takes time. And screw it, let's say you were in this other perspective forever, life is STILL very much, and equally worth living! I had the same fears, and same very scary experience, but now I am doing great! I know all of you will too.

I JUST WANT TO REASSURE EVERYONE THAT YOU WILL BE OKAY!!!

im not a doctor or anything but one thing I can promise is that if you are going through this, you'll go back to normal. Listen, to those who are long term users of weed, and I mean everyday for like 10 years idk what to do for you. Everyone else especially if its your first time listen up. I once tried a really strong joint from a dispensary and had the worst experience of my life. I was anxious and paranoid and wasnt able to sleep for a couple of days. I didnt feel like myself and my mind felt off. This is a completely normally feeling to any bad experience you have in your life. Your mind views it as a traumatic experience and puts you into a dream like state to try to make you feel better or something. I remember feeling like there was no end to this experience, until I started to get anxious about something else. I literally felt completely normal and totally forgot all about the experience from weed. The point of the story is, you just need to get through the situation and try to forget about it and you will slowly feel normal.

The more you sit on your couch thinking about it everyday the longer the affect will last. I started to focus on other things in my life and the only time i feel "off" is when I really think about it. For me its only been a month and I say theres no specific time that it takes to heal, but i mean weed is not going to screw you up forever. I remember thinking i was going to get some mental disorder like schitzo, but literally to get a mental disorder from weed, you need to have long term use of it. One or two times will NOT affect you. If you do real research there is no research that says that you can get any mental illness from weed. All of them show the affects of long term use. Also the percentage of the population that even has schitzo is like 1%. The dark feeling you might have right now is honestly just depression because of who knows what reason. Somehow you feel upset or guilty or whatever because you smoked or took an edible that one time. Literally you're okay and there are so many ancient civilizations who used marijuana before we did. Also if alch didnt affect you negativity then you're fine because statistically alch is wayy more dangerous.

I know this is long but I promise you will get better. You just need to push through it and forget about it and pretty soon you will be yourself again. I mean look at how many hard core drug addicts are fine after rehab. Your mind and body repairs itself. This is literally all your own head. You just noticed your anxiety more, or physical sensations you're feeling differently. I have talked to a doctor about all of this and I have been checked, All of these symptoms are normal and go away with time, People just never talk about it cause for some its worse than others.

After reading this, I hope you know you are okay. Try to distract your mind and talk to someone about it, especially someone who has experienced a similar situation. You WILL BE NORMAL. Dont look anything up because you’ll be more scared. If you really think something is up talk to a doctor, but first see how you feel after distracting yourself and a few months.

bro if you can see this i everything you said i have and think and see everysingle thing it has been going on for 2 months and bro i dont know what to do i wanna die like im so scared should i go to a therapist or like