I still don't feel the same after smoking weed for the first time. NEED SUPPORT PLEASE
Posted , 165 users are following.
Hello, Im posting here to get some reassurance and support. It has been over a year and a half now since I tried an illigal high (weed) for the first time and suffered a panic attack in which I thought I was going to lose my mind and die, and end up in a mental hospital. The high lasted about 4.5 hours. Nothing felt real and when the high wore off things didn't feel the same as before. I found out about derealization and depersonalization and I think that is what I have been dealing with since. I was diagnosed with GAD and I think I might of had it prior to smoking the pot but not to an extent that it bothered me.
The best way to explain it it just feels like something is off, nothings the same, i feel disconnected in a way. Like i keep trying to compare how i fet before the high (normal) to now but I cant exactly pinpoint what it is.
My vision gets weird and its hard to focus on anything. I see "noise" or static like tiny dots (visual snow) when looking at the night sky and floaters when looking at the blue sky. All things I have never experienced before the high.
At the start of this hell I thought I had died or that I was in hell. (It felt like it and my anxiety was through the roof and i felt nausous and panicky). I was obsessed with thinking i was going insane (schizophrenic) infact I still do get VERY VEEEEERY scared about it. Thinking that i could go mad. I also have light sensetivity wheb i look at something i get an afterimage if it that stays in my vision for a bit.
I feel like i had all my life ahead of me and now i cant live life like before. As if a part of me died. (Im not delusional though i dont think).
What has made it tolerable is being busy with study and work... But when im free all i do is be upset about it and feel miserable. I dont want medication because if the side effects and risks of psychosis/suicide.
I have no energy to do anything at times...
And i think the more time goes by the more i lose hope.
Please PLEASE if you can relate or have advice/support please contact me or reply to me here.
Thank you so much
19 likes, 207 replies
alexis86576 Leah208
Posted
I have the same thing going on, I tried weed for the first time around January and went a little over board with it, but as soon as it hit me I started freaking out. My heart rate jumped to 160 when I was sitting down! I thought I was dying, then I couldn't breathe, like I couldn't catch my breath. I immediately called 911 and went to the hospital and they said I was fine, and just to sleep it off, but I didn't feel fine. The next day, I didn't feel like myself, it's like I was replaced with a different, more depressed version of myself. I didn't want to do anything, everything I used to love doing suddenly didn't seem very interesting any more. And to this day, in April, I still have the shortness of breath and can't breathe. My anxiety has never been more worse than it is now and it is driving me crazy! I just wish I could get back to my normal life, I know I had anxiety before, but it wasn't this bad! I freak out over everything, I can barely leave the house, I can't sleep, I can't eat, I'm being distant towards my husband, I don't know what's going on or how to fix it, but I wish it would just stop! I try taking warm baths and sometimes that helps me feel better or to walk outside a little, just do whatever I can to take my mind off of how I am feeling. When you're free try watching your favorite show or humming works, and just tell yourself that you're okay. As crazy as it sounds, I sit in front of a mirror and tell myself I'm okay, that way I can physically see that I'm, in fact, okay.
brandon89499 Leah208
Posted
hi, I am 18 and I smoked weed for the fist time 3.5 years ago.. was my first time getting properly "stoned".. and I feel exactly the same as youve described.. like in a way I have learned to live with it like you said... I smoked it one night and then felt horrendous.. went to sleep.. woke up exactly the same... felt like I was dead. I had about 15 showers one after another.. about 20 cups of coffee.. trying to wake myself up in a way.. that evening.. I got so worked up about it.. I had severe panic attacks.. pacing up and down the kitchen.. crying my eyes out... weeks later felt the same. would find myself breaking down in class at school and running home.. I felt like I was totally detached from the whole world.. vision different... hearing different... everything different... even now I still feel exactly the same and I always know its there.. but you tend to get on with it... but just about 5 mins ago I was sat in the garden.. then bang... it was like my brain said to me.. WOAH YOUR NOT ON THIS PLANET... I can describe myself exactly how you have.. and it was only from smoking that weed ive felt this way. and its horrible.. most of the time I havent the energy to do anything at all.. even walking is a chore.. literally I feel like im possessed... id give anything to go back to that night and to never have touched the rubbish. I worry that I will feel like this for the rest of my life.. it scares me.. im so glad in a way that I have found someone else who feels the same... because everyone ive spoken to about it has just laughed and said im a liar.. blah blah blah... I just don't know what to do from here.. please reply to this.. would love to contact you personally so we can talk to eachother about it and hopefully re assure eachother that everything will be okay... lol
stay strong!
Brandon
will54787 brandon89499
Posted
Hey Brandon, I have the exact same thing, you're going through, and I'm freaking out thinking ive died because i don't wanna leave my little nephew without his Uncle. Just wondering, did you have a visible pulse in your throat, and could you feel your whole body pulsing, as that's exactly what im Having right now. Every now and then the pulse gets 10x worse and I panic thinking that i died 2 months ago
jesus14508 Leah208
Edited
've smoked for about 2-3 years consistently and the only times i stopped was when i went on a plane to other states so i couldn't access marijuana but i never struggled in those times
3-17-21 - i buy a new bong that is bigger than the previous one and i smoked w33d out of it that i've previously smoked days before. after like 10 minutes i get this weird feeling in the back of my head tingling and then my heart is racing and then i start shivering really bad. i was pretty much convinced that i was having a shroom trip because it was like the exact feeling. i end up going to sleep fine with melatonin.
3-18-22 - i wake up fine and go to college class like it never happened even though i told myself never again with that pipe. i end up going to buy a treetop hemp bar that's cbd with very little thc and i take a hit and start to feel like i did the day before. i thought to myself maybe it isn't the pipe and smoking just triggers it. days later i still felt the same and i've gone to a doctor and they only gave me medication and i've stopped smoking from how traumatizing of an experience it was.
now - i spoke to a psychiatrist and she basically said i have anxiety and she prescribed fluoxetine but i'm not sure about taking it. my dreams have been super vivid and sometimes when i wake up from sleeping at night and sometimes it's hard to go back to sleep i'm not sure whether the symptoms are from the withdrawal or just triggering it from smoking. i've been sweating like crazy almost every day from exercising and drinking only water and i'm willing to do anything to get better.
And whats weird is that ive been smoking and never had any anxiety problems but its just so odd to me that weed is making me feel this way and makes me think that if taking shrooms a couple weeks before and throwing it up had any affect on me and that smoking couldve triggered something . im not trying to be in denial that weed did this but its so odd that i buy a new bong and it makes not only me feel weird but my brother as well but even days after this it only affected me and he was fine after that.
steven86961 jesus14508
Edited
how do you feel now? i am going through something weird myself, its been 5 months, sometimes i feel like i am getting better, but then hazy feeling comes back stronger , its not anxiety, but the feeling is causing anxiety, its almost like i wake up high everyday.
tony44950 jesus14508
Posted
goddamn,i absolutely have the same shiver in the back of my head after weed. i think its trauma. i also got symptoms of depersonalization-dr. did you find out,please describe bro. im so exhausted. i dont feel the same as before ... its been a year...
jesus14508 steven86961
Posted
i almost feel normal again but i know im not cause i cant even drink alcohol and i get the urge to want to smoke but i know i cant. but for the first couple weeks i woke up feeling weird and that feeling went away but it sucked cause i couldnt concentrate on anything but that feeling because it was just there but i would just suggest taking your vitamins and getting weed out of your system which i bet is already gone
jesus14508 tony44950
Posted
i never found out what it was which sucks because not having an answer really sucks cause i cant find the solution but ive definetly felt better 2 months after. i wanna ask you what exactly happened to you and how it felt.i cant really remember the feeling it gave me because its mostly gone but it felt like an adrenaline rush in the back of my head and in the first weeks i was crying and that feeling would get to me throughout the day but i would take these pills prescribed to make me feel better and i did but i wanted to eventually ease off it to not depend on it and i eventually didnt need them. But what i would say to you is that youve been going through this for a year which i would assume that youre a strong person for making it that long and you just have to realize that it will get better even if it feels like it wont you just have to keep pushing cause you will definetly will get to the point where you dont get that feeling as much.
tony44950 Leah208
Posted
I feel the same s**t for a year,in plus that i cant normally think as before. i started to worry when i talk to others,i feel like antisocial,i never had any problems with memory,concentration or communications.
damn,im so tired bro.
how do you do now,do you use any meds,please advice me how to feel normal. i am really tired of it!
Sean7777 Leah208
Posted
Leah, unfortunately if you have a underline anxiety issue, smoking weed isn't a good idea, I used too smoke when i was in my youth, and it was all good, untill one night everything changed, time slowed down, was paranoid anxiety was threw the roof!!
Will take a few weeks for you're brain too get back to normal, as it can be a traumatic experience, can happen with any drug but people seem to have a relaxed view around weed, if you get a high strength strain with high thc, can be to some as potent as taking acid.
You will be fine though, its a learning experience don't dwel on it too much.
will54787 Sean7777
Posted
Its been over 2 months since the Incident and Ive smoked for 3 years now, it's not like it was my first time. Im starting to believe that I actually died that night and I'm just imagining all of this. Thank you though
will54787 Leah208
Edited
Im super scared, and i honestly think ive died
randy41812 Leah208
Posted
Some people suffer their first panic attack after smoking weed or doing some drugs. People say weed is harmless but anything that alters your brain chemistry is never a good idea.Some people have their worst panic attacks after drinking booze.
phillip93120 Leah208
Edited
NO WAY!!!!! EVERYTHING YOU SAID EVERYTHING TO Sensitive to lights to scared about going crazy to thinking you had gad before but wasnt strong enought to bother you but after you smoked it REALLLLLLYYY showed its self. Sometime my brain tells that my surrounding what i Believe what happened was the gad worsened to a point we where like OMG whats happening and gave us severe Depersonalization disorder/realization disorder. I thought i was alone do you have any platform we can message on ?
123pinetree Leah208
Posted
I had an edible for the first time a couple months ago and it got me and my boyfriend super high, it hit me in the weirdest way possible like I never thought weed could make someone feel. do you know that feeling when you're a kid and you suddenly gain consciousness, that's how it felt to get high, it would happen over and over and I was in this slow motion, I threw up multiple times telling myself that if I puke it out I will feel normal again. this was not the case. days later I still didn't feel normal, but the high was gone, I didn't believe it was and just kept telling myself that once it was out of my system it was going to be okay. I also looked up what was going on in the moment of the high panicking every time, depersonalisation came up and I knew that's what I must be going through. A couple months later I still feel like I'm not myself like I'm living in my head and being controlled by and auto pilot version of myself. I had accidentally got too high too times after the edible incident and I felt the same feelings and fear. I hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I will find the missing puzzle piece to feel like myself again and be able to enjoy being alone again.