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I think I may be depressed but I'm too afraid to go to my GP about it

Posted , 8 users are following.

cablackett
cablackett

So for the past 5 months I have been feeling really down. I was in a relationship with this guy and I was head over heels in love with him and I still am. I put everything I had into that relationship, we was living together and decided to start trying for a baby (he pushed for it to start off with and I ended up saying yes.. I wanted to spend the rest off my life with him and I do want children so I thought why not). One day he messaged me at work out of the blue saying he didn't want to have children with me anymore, he didn't know if he wanted me, and he didn't think we had a future together. I felt broken receiving this message I broke down at work. That night I stopped at my mums. We spoke and he said he missed me and he wanted to try with me. So we tried but ever since then I havnt been able to shake this feeling of sadness. I used to cry every single day at work, sometimes up to 4 times a day, but I never told him and I pretended like everything was ok with him. I couldn't understand how one day he was telling Me how much he loved me and that I meant the world to him and then the next day him not wanting me.

I was offered a new job at work. More responsibility and working with the management team. But I was on my own for a lot of the day and thoughts would run through my head. I'd cry. I even took some days off work because I just couldn't handle it. I wasn't eating properly. In the end I told my manager I couldn't do the job. I found it hard to concentrate and remember things which is not like me at all. He understood, he knows what's been going off in my personal life and he has actually been great at work. He always comes over to me to make sure I'm ok.

After a few months of trying with my partner he told me on holiday he didn't know if he loved me anymore. I didn't think it would hurt as much a second time round. When we got home I packed my bags and left I said I it wasn't fair him keep doing this to me and I wasn't going to sit around while he decided on weather or not he wanted me.

It's been a month now since I left and I just feel so worthless and empty inside. I'm physically and mentally exhausted. I have got to the point where I just don't see the point in life. I still cry a lot. Some days I just don't even want to get out of bed. There's been weeks where I have gone 3 days at a time without eating. There's days where I can't sleep and then other days I can sleep from when I have got home from work right through until I have to go to work again the next day because I'm just exhausted. I've been isolating myself from my friends. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about it because they just tell me I've got my whole life ahead of me.. Il get over it. I just can't seem to shake this feeling. Which is why I thought I would try on here.

Is this depression or am I just sad.

I'm really sorry for the long post. There's still so much I have missed out but I just don't know what to do anymore.

I'd really appreciate any advice. Please can someone respond to me xxx

2 likes, 25 replies

25 Replies

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  • tami0522
    tami0522 cablackett

    Posted

    Hello my name is tami i am 29 and live in wisconsin. I know the pain you are going through because it has happened to me quite a bit and ive gone through the heartache but just really glad im single again cause i find it easier to deal with things my way and no one elses. And if you ever need to talk im here for you as a friend even though i dont really know you
    • cablackett
      cablackett tami0522

      Posted

      Hi

      It's horrible to keep going through it. I feel like utter crap at the minute. Not sure what to do with myself.

      Thankyou. It's nice to have someone to talk to even if I don't know you xx

  • cablackett
    cablackett

    Posted

    So I'm having more trouble now which really isn't helping things. My ex partner got me to get a credit card in my name when we was together and make him an additional card holder. So he had his own card with his name on it.

    We have now split up and he's left me in a few thousand pounds of debt and is refusing to pay any of it even though he has all of the items in his house that that the money went on.

    I've got credit card statements to show that everything has been spent by him using his card and any payment that has been made paying the credit card off has been from my bank account.

    Is there anything I can do about this or not as I am the main card holder?

    Any advise would be much appreciated

    Thanks

    Thanks.

    • laura11452
      laura11452 cablackett

      Posted

      I would go to a solicitor for advice as to be honest I don't know what way that works.. 
  • laura08496
    laura08496 cablackett

    Posted

    i was just wondering about your credit card...call the credit card company and explain your situation. you want to cut him off, right? maybe you should cancel the account/card all together. now, what about that debt you may have to pay for? i dont want to say this, but i believe you become responsible if he doesn't pay for all that stuff he charged. and is currently enjoying. with him in his place. that greedy selfish guy. do you have a family lawyer? or someone who knows how to handle this stuff? man, lawyers cost a fortune. i wish i knew what to do exactly. you know? it was smart of you to keep all your bills. they may come in handy. i know a girl who owed thousands, and thousands....she couldn't even pay the minimum amout that is expected monthly....and some repo guy,(reposses things) came and took all her valuable stuff that she bought using her card. i hope they go and take all his stuff if he stops paying. i am hoping your bills will show what you charged, and what he charged. now, this is a big step, you might consider fileing ing bankruptsy. yea, sorry about the spelling....hope you understand what i'm talking about. you shouldn't have to pay his portion. good luck sweetie!!
    • cablackett
      cablackett laura08496

      Posted

      I took him off as an additional card holder about a month before we broke up as he had started using it for repairing his TV etc. So the account is still there as I'm still the main card holder. But as far as I know I'm the one whose responsible for paying the card as I opened it in my name. I hate what he has done to me. He is a sick man manipulating innocent women into doing what he wants.

      He did the same with another ex and spent £2500 of hers. I bet the majority of the stuff in his house has been paid for by women he has been with.

      No I don't have a family lawyer. And I know solicitors cost a bomb as I have been trying to sort my house out with my ex before him and they charge between £190 and £240 for a letter! Things are so expensive. I just want some help but I know I'm going to have to spend loads trying to sort it all out and I could end up getting nothing out of it.

      He's a very sly man and some how managers to worm his way out of situations xx

    • laura08496
      laura08496 cablackett

      Posted

      i see....so happy you took him off your card. so, thats how he gets on with life?by taking advantage of women, taking their money, stealing their hearts, and then dumping them. and then the next young lady comes along, and he starts it all over again. sounds like a pro. he must be attractive or something like that, to get any woman's attention...hahaha,pardon me i have to laugh, because this cannot go on forever. whats he going to do when he gets older? and loses his hair, exposing that tiny point on the top of his head he's been trying to hide. and then,he will not only have a huge belly, he'll have a huge butt that matches. and he will have the ugliest feet in the world. and his teeth? they will rot and turn black, and whats he going to do then? he'll sit in the park looking for any woman to look in his direction...whoever sees him will run fast and far away from this beaten down missfit. i hope i haven't upset anyone...just trying to lighten the mood. girl, good luck to you...you deserve much better!!
    • cablackett
      cablackett laura08496

      Posted

      Yes. He seems to get some sort of pleasure out of it. He alright looking. It's his charm people fall for. He goes for kind hearted or vulnerable women because he can manipulate them easier. I left my ex for him. I'd just bought a house and my ex at the time was making me pay for everything. He was messaging other women. I had to clean up after him etc. He didn't care. So when I got with my last boyfriend.. To start off with he gave me everything. He paid for things (I'd still pay for things too because I feel that is the right thing to do) he showed me he loved me and gave me the attention I wanted so I easily fell head over heels for him. He knew then he could do what ever he wanted. I'd fallen into his little game.

      He carries on doing this then yes he will end up a very lonely old man. It will get the the stage no-one will want him. And I hope he does end up alone.

      You havnt upset me and thankyou xx

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