If my son loses his fight for life so will I....

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My 12 year old son is currently battling for his life with AML (Acute Myloid Leukaemia). He was diagnosed 31st May last year. He also has been diagnosed with a thing called FLT3 which is a change in the chromosomes which means the disease is harder to treat. He had a bone marrow transplant last year and things were looking good until his blood was taken the day before Good Friday and the results revealed my nightmare that this evil disease has returned. A few weeks before we knew the Leukaemia had returned I had a really hard emotional day at work and when I came home to my wife I told her if anything happens to my son Timothy I won't want to live anymore. I'll be honest my faith in God is pretty low now as I don't understand why my son has to go through this intense treatment again and if he does he will only have a 10% chance the cancer won't come back. I know it's selfish thinking about killing myself but I have thought about doing it in such a way it looks like an accident so no one ever knows.

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  • Posted

    What a hard and dismaying time you are having, my heart goes out your family. I lost my son a few years ago and I felt that there was no other

    way but to take my own life..I took pills with drink and just lay down and thought of my boy. I came around in hospital with my husband and

    daughter sitting by my bed. The first thing my husband said was how

    selfish I was being and what about him and our daughter. ? He was so

    right. So please remember the family left around you and just think if this is what your boy would want.

    You don't say if you have other children. Everyone on this site will happily be here for you so please please just come to us when things are so difficult for you. You will get through this. I am not saying it will be easy but you will get there...I still have bad days where I don't want to get out of

    bed..

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    • Posted

      Thanks, you are right with what you say. Will definitely keep this site in mind as sometimes speaking to people I don't know gives me a different perspective on things.
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  • Posted

    Always here for you. X
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