its a long n bumpy road - 15wks run-down..... but it CAN lead to a brighter place!!!

Hi all

Update at wk 15ish. If you've not read my posts before I started getting ill august last yr with dark mood n constant nausea for months and rapid weight loss. Dr said down to anxiety as had happened briefly yr before when I was going through very stressful time. That time I took citalopram for about five months with no side effects felt back to normal after 3-4wks when nausea stopped. Stopped meds around 5 months feeling 100%.

This time went on cit, 8 wks did not improve nausea and still low mood plus was sleeping 3-4 days a week all day as well as night, wiped me out totally. Dr changed me to flu and instantly got more energy but lots of side effects (insomnia, nights sweats, jaw clenching, shakes, etc). The nausea didnt ease til around 6wks after anti sickness pills, propanalol and acupuncture.

Meantime dr started ball rolling on numerous tests to see if underlying cause for nausea. Things continued to improve physically but wk 9-10 slipped back to feeling very low being very tearful. May have been stress of xmas or ongoing medical tests weighing me down (had every scan, camera and physical exam going I think within 6 wks!).

Dr agreed 2-3wks ago my mood should be better (blubbing in her surgery for no real reason). Decided to try upping dose rather than weaning off n changing again. Started 30mg just over 2wks ago (alternate 20/40).

So how's it going? Quite often now I forget the illness, wake up thinking about normal things - thats the best way to describe it. Ive found myself singing along with the radio and teasing the kids plus ive been so much more chatty with friends and at work. Energy is great despite waking just after 5am and ive even been out with a friend for my first two short runs!(well run stagger walk - ive always despised running!).in essence Ive felt like myself despite insomnia occasional night sweats n jaw clenching!

Cant say for def if just timing, upping the dose, relief of medical results being not bad news or what but for now im enjoying being in that sunny place :-)

You need the patience of a saint to get through this which is not easy when you feel crap but there can be light at the end of the tunnel. The meds help though tyou have to make the effort too BUT the way I feel now it was all worth it- long may it last!

Im not daft enough to think thats it, im expecting bad days to throw me at times but will remain grateful for all the good days til then.

Hope this helps people who are just starting or part way through the fluox journey. I dint think id have persevered with the information and advice from this forum, thank you to all the lovely people who have given words if sympathy and support throughout. :-)

Here's hoping you all reach that brighter place soon.

Best wishes

Vix x

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