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Lichen Sclerosis

Posted , 20 users are following.

markygeezer
markygeezer

My girlfriend has just been diagnosed with Lichen Sclerosis and I wondered if this is the end of our sex life as we know it.

Sexual activity has been minimal over the past few months and I would like to hear from others about how this condition affects Oral sex, Anal sex and full penetration.

I know she has pain but men do have sexual needs too.

I would be most grateful to hear other sufferers opinions.

1 like, 34 replies

34 Replies

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  • diana71766
    diana71766 markygeezer

    Posted

    I don't want you to take this wrong but if you love her it shouldn't be all about you first. Talk find out what she is going through. Make it work for both of you. See what she has lost her needs. Don't be selfish it is not just about you.

    • markygeezer
      markygeezer diana71766

      Posted

      Diana believe me when I say that I am one of the most UN selfish men that a woman could ever meet.

      In the bedroom department my philosophy has always been to consider the needs of my partner before my own ,at all times, so can assure you and anyone else that may respond that I'm in no way selfish.

      I just wanted some advice on this issue, my partner was only diagnosed on Thursday and it's come as a bit of a bombshell to both of us.

      I could live without sex permanently if I had to so am seeking advice for BOTH of us. ...

  • Guest
    Guest markygeezer

    Posted

    This is a forum for sufferers of Lichen Sclerosis where the majority of members are female. I empathize with your girlfriend as LS is and can be VERY painful. I can only speak for myself, but I do not want to hear nor do I care about your selfish sexual needs. I don't believe this is the forum for you.

    • markygeezer
      markygeezer Guest

      Posted

      I think your right, because the two responses I've seen so far have been full of negativity

    • susan43705
      susan43705 markygeezer

      Posted

      Hi Marky, It doesn't have to be the end of your sex life once the LS is managed which is possible and many people do have a sex life and define it however they want to.  Also you might have fun with different size dialtors so that penetration from you becomes easier and easier.  A friend of mine's doctor recommended them.  They come in a package of like 5 or 6 and you work up to the size you can handle. The couple I know had a ball.  Look Marky, everyone has something.  I don't know how old you are, but when you really love someone, you do a workaround. RIght now your girlfriend is going through hell trying to figure out how to manage the pain and integrating this new upset in her life.  It ain't pretty, but it's manageable.

  • seginns
    seginns markygeezer

    Posted

    Your girlfriend has a condition that will affect her for the rest of her life. It’s painful, embarrassing, depressing, and you feel totally isolated because you can’t tell anyone about it. I personally went through a six month period where it was too painful to even walk long enough to get groceries. And you’re worried about your “needs”? I am feeling really lucky right now to be married to a man who put his “needs” aside because he could see the emotional and physical pain I was in. Yes, you could be pleasured in ways other than vaginal penetration if that is too painful for her but you need to stop thinking about yourself. Man up and be there for her. 
  • dee62130
    dee62130 markygeezer

    Posted

    I, unlike the previous responses understand your concern. Hopefully with proper treatment, she will have it under control and your sex life will return as it was.  Possibly with her understanding and appreciating your concern, she will have a greater appreciation for you. Don't lose hope. Sex is a part of life and maybe the previous women's responses are from women who never had a good sex life. I think it was great that you found this thread and asked your question. Good luck. 

    • markygeezer
      markygeezer dee62130

      Posted

      Dee thanks for your response and understanding, unfortunately the general response on here seems to be that I am a typical selfish male who thinks only of himself.

      Responses that have made me realise that this obviously isn't the site for me, I mistakenly thought this was a site where I could get some valuable insight to a condition that is going to affect both of us.

      Unfortunately there seems to be too many small minded individuals on here.

      Therefore I shall go elsewhere for the help and advice I was hoping to find here. ........

    • cynthia40883
      cynthia40883 markygeezer

      Posted

      Hi Mark, I applaud you for entering this arena. I wish my partner would have been as sensitive. It is too soon to panic, Your situation with your loved one may well be manageable. There is hope, for sure. Education is the way to approach this. If she finds a knowledgeable doctor, go with her. Stay positive,dear. I have a feeling that you both will survive this. Sorry for the negativity from others.
    • diana71766
      diana71766 cynthia40883

      Posted

      It's not negative attitude. My first thought was for her. Making her feel good about herself. Knowing that she has others that care.

    • diana71766
      diana71766 dee62130

      Posted

      I have been married since I was 17. 45 years. He still loves me.
    • Guest
      Guest cynthia40883

      Posted

      What part of I know she's in pain but men have needs is sensitive?

    • cynthia40883
      cynthia40883 Guest

      Posted

      Sonya, I think he is trying to figure it out. I doubt that he would deliberately put himself in our midst, to be ridiculed. Don't forget it is rather mind blowing when you first find out. I remember my reaction and my partner's reaction in the beginning. We have since dealt with it differently than when first diagnosed. It has gone through different stages. More at peace now, but not so in the beginning, just like any life changing health disorder..

    • jill4444
      jill4444 markygeezer

      Posted

      Please do not be put off by these remarks .. we do not all lack sympathy. Continue checking into this site and you will find lots of valuable information and support. I for one have found olive oil to be my saviour. Just general olive oil - u personally use the Samaritan brand. Tell your partner to use it after every toilet visit plus before bed. Smear it on all areas. I now don’t have to use the dermovate and it has cleared the white patches up. I am still slightly sore after intercourse but then another couple of doses of the oil and I am fine again. Good luck and please don’t let the negative comments you have had put you off. You are obviously a caring man to have posted for help in the first case. Good luck. 
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