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Lost confidence!

Posted , 7 users are following.

elle127
elle127

Hi Ladies,

These last few weeks have been weird to say the least!  Firstly, my confidence seems to have vanished.  I've never been full of confidence anyway but it's now affecting my work.  I question everything  I do, feel a failure if I get the slightest thing wrong and panic if I have to do something that I've not done for a while.  What is wrong with me?  Anybody else been like this?

Secondly, I've had a weird dizzy/muzzy head and also experienced vertigo on a few occasions with a pulsating in my right ear.  I can hear my own heartbeat and it's quite loud.  Fortunately, it's cleared for the moment but it keeps coming back.  I do have tablets for vertigo as I've had this in the past but it just appears out the blue.  Does anyone else have it and know what sets it off?

Thirdly!!!  I've an overactive bladder (which started with onset of peri) and I've tablets for this which I take at night as I've been up several times and now with the help of the medication I'm just up the once.  But I'm suffering with a  irritable urethra.  Probably due to me peeing all the time.  God when does this end???  I don't think I've an infection but I'm sore and irritiable down below......anybody any advice for this please?

Apart from the above I thought I was coping quite well :0   I have completely stopped HRT.  I finished at the end of January.  Seem to be gaining weight and want to eat as much chocolate as I can lay my hands on!!  Wonder why my weight is increasing??!!  :0  Oh dear, please don't tell me this ALL to do with my hormones??

My main worry is the confidence issue.  It's got to the stage where I don't want to go to work yet I'm the only breadwinner so I don't have much choice!  Help!!

Elaine xx

2 likes, 23 replies

23 Replies

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  • caroleUJ62
    caroleUJ62 elle127

    Posted

    Hi Elaine,

    I too have lost alot of confidence. I'm 53, and am in the middle of the perimenopause, and have quite a few health scares, which have turned out to be nothing serious, but totally panicked me at the time.  My hormones are all over the place, and my doctor put me on antidepressants and a low dose of proponolol about 10 days ago.

    I have gone ot feeling still 'quite young' and 'with it', to thinking I've got early onset alzheimers and am totally out of touch with the modern world in a  few months!!

    I feel a bit better tonight after meeting up with my cousin who is 67 this year ans still dresses like shes in her twenties and looks great, and was very empathetic about the menopausal years being totally awful - but it does get much better!!

    So I am somewhat cheered up.

    I keep doing all the stuff one is advised to do and taking all the right vitamin supplements, and am hanging on in there.

    I have had leaky bladder, palpitations, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, agraphobia.

    I am also on sertraline, and I think - hope its starting to help a bit but might ask my GP for a higher dose, am on only 50mg a day.

    • kim94523
      kim94523 caroleUJ62

      Posted

      Awww Carole!  That stinks...!  I just replied to another post about antidepressants... they didn't work for me for panic, anxiety and plapatations but benzodopamines did (Klonipin).  Don't lose hope!  Just come here and "blow up" everyone's screens with rants like mine.  the nice women on here don't seem to mind and it helps smile
    • caroleUJ62
      caroleUJ62 kim94523

      Posted

      Thanks Kim. I have used benzo's and they are calming, but I am trying to get off them as I have been I think too reliant on them.  I have also been told I'm not allowed to drive until I come off them which is inconvenient to say the least.

      Just trying to carry on and hoping the antidepressants kick in properly soon. Trying to do some housework which is totally knackering!!!!!!

       

    • kim94523
      kim94523 caroleUJ62

      Posted

      Good luck Carol! Whatever works is perfect! My doctor told me the same thing about benzo's but, obviously, my natural path told me they aren't as bad as the press would have you believe and she would like me to stay on them… Go figure :-)
  • elle127
    elle127

    Posted

    ****UPDATE****   

    Hi Ladies,

    Well I visited my GP today and it seems I have a UTI.  I was given antibiotics and he said the vertigo was probably set off by me having this infection.  I've been given Betahistine 8mg tablets.

    I didn't mention any of my other peri symptoms as he was a male doctor and young enough to be my son!!!

  • shaznay96184
    shaznay96184 elle127

    Posted

    Hi Elaine

    Think I went through a drop in my overall levels of confidence about 18mths ago.

    We'd sold our Business/family home of 22yrs. The process of selling took 8mths and was probably up there on the stress scales as a bereavement. Bad.

    Had worked 11hr days for those 22yrs in a very 'hands-on' customer-based business: me being the 'face' of that (nah, you didn't need a good-looking face, so I was perfect for that!).

    Had busy busy life. Coping with mentally-ill sister for 9 of those yrs; had tto cope with losing 3 parents/in-laws and working/grieving. That was just so bloody hard. Actually think some of my Peri symptoms got hidden there too.

    Well once we'd sold our business, it took me 6mths to recover from that. Having gone from the one everyone turned to, I was alone with nothing to do. I'd craved 'Me' time, but I suppose I missed the busy life......that another year of would probably have done me in!

    Think because of this my confidence took a knock; I was getting more and more Peri and missed working - ironically!! Have worked/spent all day with my husband for past 26yrs. Hard for most as that may seem, we've loved each others company. We laugh/joke a lot - our complete savour. Oh, and my swearing addiction - great for relieving stress!!:-)

    Found quite naturally after 'coming down' from the stress of the sale that things changed for me confidence-wise. Have to admit that i come across as bubbly, super confident and 'happy-go-lucky' which I am essentially. But I don't like going out socially/in the evening without my ol' man. I've always been like that. He's more socially 'social' than me (loved a drink/banter in the boozer etc). I wasn't very good at drinking - but very good at getting drunk then sick, hence I don't drink much at all now!!).

    What I will say Elaine is there's no better meds/support than from someone who knows you well/loves you. I'd say another side of my personality is that I'm a tough nut, tell it as it is and don't waste my time worrying about crap, which has probably helped me 'recover' from all the really challenging things in my life!!

    But best of all is having a good laugh every day, even at yourself. Seems to work for me, but I appreciate oh too well that not everyone can do that without medical help. My eldest sister being a prime example. (Out of us 5 kids she was always the quiet, sensitive one. In my family, that made you 'different'........little did we know what was in store!!)

    Cheer up Elaine, as you'll see there's some great support for you on here. First step might be to get some B6/12 vits, look at a good 'Menopause' vit/min supplement then have a good read around this forum. Its full of great, first-hand experience advice!!:-)

    Failing that, go and see your Doctor ha ha!

    Sx

    • elle127
      elle127 shaznay96184

      Posted

      Hi Shaznay,  It's me your daft friend who you compared to Dave (with the big bum and heels) on that silly tv advert!!!  smile  lol

      Thanks for your lovely long message.  I am already on loads, and I mean loads of vitamins and a herbal tablet for menopause too.  Including the B vits.  I think I felt so down as I went to the doctors yesterday and I've a UTI so that made me feel yuck.  I'm now on antibiotics.  I had an awful weekend and couldn't stop peeing due to this infection....I've become highly acquainted with my toilet and now know every blemish/mark on the toilet walls!!!

      As for getting support at home, well hubby is there and I know he loves me but hes not one for showing emotions so the support is lacking.  My dear mother is in a home as she has Alzheimers and I miss talking to her.  We were really close as my Dad died when I was only 10yrs and Mum and I were like sisters/friends as well as Mum and daughter.  Don't have any close friends really but I'm pleased I've joined this forum if only to let off steam and have a good old moan!

      Thanks for your support.

      E. x

    • shaznay96184
      shaznay96184 elle127

      Posted

      Hi Elaine

      Sorry for not replying. I've been feeling sorry for myself for a few days.  Got yet another bang-on-time Period that was really heavy. Also had a real guts ache which is not like me.

      Think it might be me having started using Magnesium for my on/off constipation.  Concluded its not a good idea for me to take that when I have a heavy P.  Only good thing: I wasn't constipatedsmile!! Stopped taking them today and feel 1m times better. Its either that, or because I've stopped bleeding.  So bloody hard to know what's what!!

      Have to say that I do believe taking Menopace with its B/D vits and mins works for me.  Been in a much better mood and my joints are so much better since I've been on them. 

      Feel for ya kid with your UTI.  I appreciate how uncomfortable they are, but can't remember the last time I had one.  Hopefully the Antib's have done their job?!

      Like you, I miss my mum terribly. Lost her 14yrs ago: my dad when I was 20. So felt 'orphaned' aged 40, which sounds silly but the 'baby' finally had to be her own person.  Thank God for a wonderful husband xxxxxx

      Love this site for the almost anonymous opportunity to rant and rave, and the cherry on the cake is that most of the ladies on here agree with me, ha, ha!!!

      Keep the faith Dave, tee hee (he's got better legs than melol!)

      Sx

       

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